A Tribute to Those Taken from Our Community Too Soon

A couple of weeks ago I posted to the surgical weight loss groups I belong to a question “What are the top three reasons why you wanted to have weight loss surgery”. Your responses were overwhelming, honest and the candidness of some of the answers brought tears to my eyes. The questions were posed so that I could write a “speech” for an event held this past weekend. I promised to publish the speech once it was delivered. Those in attendance of the “Coalition of Bariatric Patients of Ontario heard a version of my planned speech as my emotions got the best of me. Here are the words I intended to say…I believe my message was heard.

To be healthier; to be able to play with my children; to see my children grow, graduate, marry, have children of their own; to be able to shop for clothes in a regular store, to be able to look at myself in a mirror without disgust; to sit in a chair, with arms, without fear that it may break, without fear it will remain stuck to my butt when I stand; to avoid insulin shots, to get rid of my CPAP machine etc etc etc.

These are the some of the many reasons why we all signed up for this surgical procedure, none of us signed on for the issues we have related to the surgery (iron deficiency, micro nutrient malnutrition, bone marrow failure, bowel obstructions, ulcerations. . .premature death) Oh we were all told the statistics…even today we heard that there is a 3% rate of death associated with Bariatric surgery. We also knew the risks of complications and I know I rationalized all of these risks with the fact that the risk of complication and death after this surgery was still far less than my risk of disability and death without this surgery…that these “complications” happen to people who didn’t follow the rules (I will be a saint).

I stand here before you five years post VSG, nearly 2 years post revision first to a gastric pouch and then a modified RNY (four or five small intestinal bypasses)the poster child for post bariatric surgery complications. The last 18 months has been the fight of my life (TPN dependant, Bone Marrow failure, 69 units of blood in less than 4 months, 4 Septic events , the last of which they gave me a less than 40% chance of survival). If asked I would if I would go through this again. . .IN a NEW YORK Minute.

So when asked I accepted the invitation to lead an act of remembrance to those of our community who have passed since the last time we gathered. I will not list names, but I personally know of six. Inevitably it is asked, “was their death attributable to their weight loss surgery?” and whether we like it or not, the answer will always be YES…because once we have had this surgery the quality of our health care changes. Sometimes it helps our diagnosis, other times it hinders the treatment modalities that can be used and ultimately the fact we were once obese carries a legacy of damage we can never completely reverse.

So with that said I would like to pay tribute to those who have travelled this road beside us, but have been stolen away from our community too soon for our liking. May the knowledge learned from their passing make the road we travel a little smoother. A moment’s silence to those who now guide our journey in spirit. . .

Thank You

Thank you for the sobering post. It is all too easy to gloss over potential complications.

i am a fairly recent post op. If it is not too identifying to those who are deceased, would you mind posting what their complications were?

I personally find this request macabre and in poor taste. .I understand your fear, the fact that surgeons down play the risks etc.  I do remember one surgeon saying that spewing stats of 1 in 12 etc is immaterial if your that 1  because your personal risk was 100% probability.   I will disclose that one died of a pulmonary embolism (blood clot in the lung ) one of a ruptured colon secondary to bowel obstruction,  another of cardiac arrest possibly related to low potassium.  I know of a woman who passed of liver failure related to refusing to take her supplements and another to sepsis. ..the final I cannot disclose as it may reveal her identity. 

The point of my post was noth to emphasize the risk of death or life-threatening complications more merely to pay respect to those who knowingly took a risk hoping to benefit but instead became a mortality statistic

Thanks Dawn

Leona

Your speech and moment of silence was a great tribute to those who have passed in our community. You are an inspiration for others and a great resource for many I look forward to seeing you again at next year's event.  

Lynn 

Lynn

I appreciate your appreciation.  I don't do what I do for the accolades, I speak my emotions, wear my heart o my sleeve.  There is never any doubt about how I feel about something.  I think by sharing how I feel it validates the same feelings others may have but are afraid to share.

Thanks.

I thank you posting this and for leading an act of rememberance...gastric surgery patients don't have a lot of outlets and sometimes (few) don't have  a lot of support, just look at how some of society judges those that choose to have gastric surgery, it's not always polite. 

Thank you again for a lovely tribute and an topic worthy of noting

IT WAS A GREAT SPEECH AND YOU WERE AMAZING!!!