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My dear mother always said " Life isn't fair, deal with it". We can't have everything exactly how we want, you must adapt and drive on.

As for all the "mean" posts, well the way you're responding to people who have given their opinions (pretty nicely in my view) is childish. If you are dealing with the hospital in the same manner I can certainly see why they want you to see a psychologist. You ask for opinions then get mad if they don't match your own? Call yourself a victim numerous times? Heck even crying all the way to the bus and at work just screams not ready. If you can't handle a little setback now, what will you do when you are feeling sick after surgery, or hit a stall? Call the hospital and tell them they did the surgery wrong?

I"d like to provide a little perspective. There is a 2-4 year wait for RNY surgery here in Alberta. I had my surgery in Feb, and called the office 3 times during my 2 year wait, just to check the status of being shortlisted. I waited 2 yrs from consult to surgery, initially it was supposed to be a 4 year wait. I understand that it can be difficult to wait, but the time gave me reassurance that I was in fact making the best decision of my life. It was not something I wanted to rush into and I was comfortable, secure and relaxed with my decision by the time my date came around. 

Yesterday I had a 5mth follow up with the surgeon, and everything is great. Patience is a vital in this process. :) Find balance, jump through the hoops they set and the finish/starting line will be there.

What's the big deal about seeing the psychologist? Just get it done, then wait for your date.

Don't put it out there if all you want is rainbows and butterflies. This is a public forum. You won't get all Hugs and kisses. Especially when good sincere advice that is given is repeatedly ignored. Your hole is dug deeper as a result. 

my journey was a year and a half and yes there were times when I thought I was forgotten. Last summer I was so upset and at my wits end physically and mentally. I saw others glide through in 5 or 6 months and yes I was envious but then I realized these folks are ensuring I am ready and prepared for my surgery. I called twice in 1.5 yrs.

You are being processed. Believe me, they won't forget you! Five calls in 13 weeks is excessive.Can you imagine the errors over sites and chaos if all of us were to call every two weeks? Nothing would get done.

You're not following directions. This is all about directions. Every day for the rest of your life will be about following directions. Don't get your back up, this is reality and if you don't like it then maybe you need to reevaluate your choice.

I admire your logging food making changes needed. You need to work on trust and having some flexibility. You're not demonstrating that ability and so the Centre is acting accordingly. It's not a personal attack against you, they are doing their job.

If you decide you can follow the rules that you will by for the rest of your life, do what they want.  Align to the rules and you'll get your date.

Continue escalating it and you will continue to impact your surgery date.  You are being your own worst enemy.  And no, you're not a victim. 

Good luck.

Hi, 

I have been following your post and understand your frustration.  Having said that at this point the best thing to do is stay calm reassure the Psychologist you are just anxious because you are eager for this life change and be patient.  I believe the fear the centre is having, is in that if you call this often for the surgery date, what will you be like after the surgery.  They need to ensure you can be patient when your weight has not moved in 4 or more weeks and do not freak out.  The process is very long and patience is key.  I suggest you just trust in the process and relax, your time will come and  you need to believe that.

My favourite saying is it is what it is - what has happened no matter whether you were at fault or them happened, however now is the time to give in, show them you can play ball and be patient and get the surgery.  Also take negative comments on your actions with a grain of salt.  You can't change the past so it is better to receive positive constructive criticism to help you move forward.  As most comments seem to be giving you the same go forward advise it would be in your best interest to heed everyone's helpful advise.

I wish you luck and hope things go well with the psych.  Just stay calm, positive and try to convey that you are normally a patient person!!  Your time will come soon!!  Trust!!

Hi, Be patient you're going to get there.  A psych. exam was required by my insurance prior to approval it was just one of the steps.  If you've taken anti-anxiety meds or meds for depression in the past your insurance is more than likely the one requesting that you get the evaluation not your surgeons office.  I had to go through the whole process twice before my insurance approved me so I had to wait 2+ years for surgery.  The appointment isn't to see if you're crazy basically you will probably only talk to a Doc for 10-15 mins.  who will determine your willingness to comply after surgery & why you want surgery.  Then you'll have to fill out a very long fill in the blank multiple choice question test, questions like "have you ever harmed yourself?"  "Do you want to harm yourself?" stuff like that.  Please be patient.  I called my wonderful insurance coordinator a lot & she helped me through the process.  Instead of talking to patient advocacy try asking for your surgeons insurance coordinator.  It's just all part of a very long process & is one of the final steps so hang in there.  If you do end up needing therapy at least you'll be on your way to that as well.  I'm sorry for your sadness & confusion they weren't telling you that you're crazy but your insurance is making you do this for approval.  Someone could have been rude to you about the reasons but I guarantee you it's for insurance approval.  Best of luck with everything. 

We have a very different insurance/approval process here in Ontario Canada. Our health insurance is run by the province, not private insurance companies. Calling the surgical scheduling coordinator is what got her into this pickle in the first place, so I'm hoping she won't do that. lol

yeah sorry I didn't really  pay attention to the forum location just the "So now I am crazy."  I have heard you all have really great insurance.  I do hope she will realize that it's just part of a long drawn out process & to just be patient.  Reading through the post I did call my insurance coordinator a lot but only to see how long I had to wait to start my process over the first time I got denied & when I say a lot I probably only called her 4-5 times over a two year period.  & I LOVE your I've got a flat As_ quote...it always makes me smile every time I see your posts on the boards.

We actually have awesome health insurance and I feel extremely fortunate, not just for having WLS paid for over 8 years ago but for the free hospitalizations, doctors, specialists, tests, etc that it provides. I was very sick last year and without OHIP I'm pretty sure I'd be living in a box under the local bridge. lol

It is a cute tag line, isn't it? Too bad it's so true! haha

I have deleted my original message and will be taking a break from posting to this forum.  Thank you to everyone who provided support to me at this low point in my journey, I really appreciate it.