Tired of sitting on the fence and wish I could make up my mind :(

So I was called from Ottawa with a surgery date at the end of June and I decided that I would try to lose the weight on my own, with a fitbit and diet changes , but it is so hard and now I think I should get the surgery but so many people are saying i dont need it, i have about 70 pounds to lose. Don't know what to do, so frustrated with my own indecision. I am afraid if I get the surgery, that I will never be able to eat normally again, that certain foods will make me sick, and I have seen people gain the weight back and that is what is influencing me at the moment :(

But on the other hand, I see all the success stories and I want to be one of them. Any suggestions would be very welcome.

Thanks

When you are ready you will know what to do, at least that's how it was for me.

I just felt acceptance and realized that surgery is the only thing that will help me.

I still have moments of doubt and get scared but deep down I know it is the right choice.

My advice would be to wait until you are sure - it will take as long as it takes.

In the meantime you are doing awesome on fitbit!  Keep up the good work.

I wish I had answers for you, but I'm pre op as well. I do how ever understand your situation and all I can say is this is for you and only you can decide. I have some people is my life that don't think I should have surgery. They think I'm strong enough to do it my self. I have told them all the same thing and that is that I am smart enough be know I need help and this tool is just what I need and once I have it I will be strong enough to use it. I believe this is the hardest decision of my life. I believe you are doing the right thing. You will know if this is for you and if you have any doubts you should wait. Sorry I can't be more helpful.

Take Care

Lisa

Hey Taniagirl, 

I completely agree with Zizzler , I felt the acceptance when I was ready also . I was the same as you with the indecision . I contemplated surgery around 2 years ago , I made an appointment to discuss it with my doctor , he gave me a Bariatric booklet and said look it over and call me and I will refer you . I never called because I went home and was so freaked out by the whole thing !! Couldn't get my head around how I would have to eat for the rest of my life . Felt the whole thing was so drastic . 

So I plodded on and did lose around 65 lbs on WW , but of course I gained it back , and then some :( 

Then last October I had to go back to my doctor due to more issues with my health , had to have a stress test and ECG , wear a holter ( all totally fine ) , my back is wrecked with Degenerative disc and the weight is just aggravating it . So I decided enough is enough .....THIS is drastic ...living ( or not living in my opinion) like this ! I cant do it by myself ...ive proved that over 20 years . Im 36 and I need to do this for myself before its too late . 

So now im waiting ....and im sooooo ready and I know I am . And I have to say these boards have educated me so much more than any doctor's office or info session or handout !! It really helped me see the real side of WLS and actually helped me make up my mind for sure ! The people on here are so amazing and helpful and honest , so keep reading , and if you never feel like this is the way for you to go , then it probably isnt . You do have to be sure and I believe that you will feel it , the acceptance . 

How easy is it for you to get back on the surgery list ? Did they take you off ? Have you got support from your family and friends around you ? Sometimes I find we can be so swayed by discussing it all the time with others *****ally have no concept of our struggle . I tend to keep quiet , most know and most accept but I wont get drawn in to a debate as ive made my decision . 

I really hope you find your answer , its so hard to decide on something so big . If you need any more support , I am a willing ear :)) 

Chin up lovey xx 

I have my doubts as well but I know that this is right for me due to many, many failed attempts at making healthy choices. I'm trying to lose weight before surgery as I think it is best to go into any operation as healthy as you can be. Feel free to add me to fitbit https://www.fitbit.com/user/2B2V65 . I love going for walks and hikes and joined a gym two weeks ago, feel free to join me any time to chat :)

I know this is one of the hardest decision we will have to make.  For myself, I feel like a failure for hoping that surgery will help me get my life back.  That people will judge me for not trying hard enough to loose weight on my own.  That I might get complications after surgery...but then again, I look at all the positive side of surgery and it gives me hope.  I don't think I'll ever be 100% confident in my choice...but I know it's the right choice for me at this time in my life.  Hope you get clarity and peace of mind.  Good luck on YOUR JOURNEY *hugs*

Although "they" claim that 3% - 5% of people can lose more than 50 pounds without surgery and not gain it back within five years, I have never personally known anyone who was able to do it. 

Surgery is still hard and you have to follow the plan or you will gain that weight back too.  "Only 70 pounds" is a lot of weight.  It eventually ruins your health and quality of life. Getting surgery is not to drastic.  It is really common sense, because nothing else has a chance of working.

Getting the surgery is the easy part. Getting your mind into the process is a lot of work. No one can make this decision for you nor should they try. It needs to be something you are really committed to. There are days I get tired of the restrictions but I would not change my decision for anything. For me this was life saving.

Only have surgery if you are ready for it.

With that being said - think back to the number of times you have tried to lose weight.  Most of us have successfully lost weight dozens and dozens of times.  Then we gain it all back, plus more.  Has this happened to you?  Do you think if you try again, you will be successful?  If so, why?  

Excess weight causes a lot of health problems.  Due to my obesity, I developed high blood pressure, my back and joints are destroyed and I need a cane to walk, and oh wait, I also have congestive heart failure.  I have more health issues, but those are the main ones.  Don't let your weight destroy your health and the quality of your life.  WLS is a TOOL, and will help you maintain your weight loss.

Good luck to you, whatever your decision.

Honestly?  I don't understand going under the knife for WLS with only 70 pounds to lose.  If you have no medical necessity to lose that weight, I would suggest you try to do it without surgery. 

However, the fact that you were approved and got a surgery date surprises me, unless you have other medical issues going on. 

And, the fact that you got that far and turned back sort of hurts a little because so many of us have to jump thru so many hoops to get that far and you just walked away from it.

 But that's just my opinion.  You have to make that decision alone.

I am not trying to be mean so hope I don't get those responses. I hope you can decide what is right FOR YOU.  Good luck.