embarrassed by wls?

 Ok...I feel a lil targetted since I'm the one that recently posted about feeling like a failure.

First of all......OMG i can't believe how good you look!!!! WOW...you have done phenomenally!!! I hadn't seen your pictures before.  I do lurk at all the pics I can on here...beware people!!

I guess the word failure is maybe misused in expressing what I'm feeling.  Put it aside for now...I just hate the fact that I cannot control my food intake, the quality and quantities or combine quantity, quality and proper exercise all at once!!!

 I can exercise reguarly..actually swam 1 km every day (40 laps) for months and lost hmmm...a few pounds.  Of course while i was swimming my food intake wasnt the greatest.  I can possibly regulate the food intake...not forever and no garranty that i'll be able to do that AND exercise...its been problematic in the past.  So...I just  CANNOT do it ALL right... ALL OF THE TIME... and I feel that if I could, I wouldn't be looking to remove 90% of my stomach.

Its basic for all the non obese people and my whole life I wished I could just be NOT fat but never have been able to do it.  So ok...failure isnt right...it certainly wasnt for lack of trying, just couldnt stick with any of it forever.  THAT is what is making me sad.  I think definitely there is something physiological? hormonal? psychological? all of the above? just the right mix of being off a half a bubble from the norm on all 3? 

Having said that...believe me I dont view getting the wls done as a failure oh no no...that one is a great FEAT!!!! 

Anyway, at the end of the day....I just wish I didnt have to get surgery...but i will...;-)

This forum is for people who had WLS so everyone here had BMI of at least 35 with co-morbidities or 40.  If you look at the signatures / tickers a lot of people were MUCH higher.

This is like AA for fatties - we are ALL fatties here.

Your expressed idea is very common.  It is a demon we have all faced.  We ALL had to say "I am a diet failure" before we asked for WLS.

I hated that I never felt full - and didn't like to record everything I ate - or lost weight then gained it back.

But if you think about it, a NORMAL body will RESIST weight loss.

For me, surgery did change the satiety thing, which is marvelous !

You weren't targetted, believe me I know !  When you are targetted they go on about you for days !!!   

 sleepless I am pretty sure if nata was targetting you she would have simply put this post in your thread, she hasn't shown herself as shy or coy imo.  I think many of us "hate" the way we got to the point that we could apply for the over 40 BMI club, again just my opinion.  

Thanks Nata, and others in this thread, we haven't taken the "easy" way out, we've taken the best tool offered.  For those who judge us negatively, walk a day in my shoes and you won't be thinking I have chosen the easy way at all.  There are days when this decision sucks big time.  But not most days and certainly not the day I step on the scale or shop for new threads!  

feeling kinda sappy now, gonna go watch some Lewis Black to get my sarcastic back!  

Well Ian, two years ago my colleague saw me kickboxing in the gym and commented - now I know why you had melted. It's a hell of work, hard work, but now I can do it and I see results. Before wls there was huge effort and none or very short living results.

Nah, I didn't target you,
you were my inspiration for the post, but it's not just you. Doubts are normal part of the process. And expressing them freely is you full right at this forum.

People often live with the shame feeling because they had wls and that's the point that I object, even though it's their right  for their point of view as well.

I don't feel bad about having to have WLS.  Infact, my decision to have it has be liberating.  Instead of ignoring the 335 lb elephant in the room (NO I am not calling myself an elephant- figure of speech) I am being open about what I am doing and why.  I tell everyone.  And because I am being open, I am noticing people are being more open with me.  My patients, friends, nieghbours.  Many people struggle with their weight and I am hearing about those struggles. And it has been great.  I have enjoyed being part of a community (on OH and facebook) of people going through similar experiences as me.  I have often felt isolated and this experience has been great. 

 My clinic is going to be closed for 6 weeks and hopefully I will be shrinking.  People are going to notice and put 2+2 together.  So I tell people.  And there are several people I have talked to that hopefully will be inspired by my weight loss (like I have been inspired by others) to take the plunge and send in their referrals.

I don't see WLS as the easy way out.  And I haven't heard that from anyone I have talked to.  But I fully intend to hand over the post WLS diet to the first person that does and challedge them to eat the same way as I will and see how long they last on it.

You radiate confidence and people reflect it. Completely agree and totally share this approach.
Good luck!

Amen

My nephew (age 9) said wls was "cheating" but he's ... 9.

Diets fail. The overall success rate after 5 years is only 5%. Maybe people can trim off 20 lbs and stay thin, but they are the exception rather than the rule. for 100 lb weight loss surgery is the ONLY proven method.

If diet and exercise were DRUGS they would not make it to market as they are NOT successful.

I tell everyone re WLS if they ask. If I am having to explain why I can't eat something, sometimes I say I had surgery. Right now, my surgery is so recent, most people I know have seen the rapid drop and ask questions.

I imagine in the future I will just be seen as normal weight, and will join in conversations re flab on thighs and exercise programs etc. without raising an eyebrow.

The weirdest thing for people is saying I went sugar free. There are so many Type 2 diabetics in middle age that this diet modification gets a lot of conversation (and support).

You'll get there.

Funny thing, early out I was annoyed by people discussing the loss/regain of the last 10 pounds. The last two years I'm battling these 10 bouncing pounds and think that Karma is a ... lol.

Two years from now you'll say "I wish I couldn't tolerate some foods, lol". I saw it happening on this board.