Struggles.......

I haven't blogged in a few weeks.  Mostly because I have been away from the computer but also because I wasn't sure how to write about this. 
On March 9th my brother-in-law Brady was in a horrific train accident. My husband and I spent a week in London with his parents and brother while Brady was in a coma. On March 15th, Brady was taken off life support and passed away.
It was one of the most devastating and trying weeks of our lives. It was so hard to watch my husband and his family go through this.. My heart still breaks for them, especially my mother-in-law.  I know first hand what it is like to lose a child... Even though it was different ... I know that hurt.  I wish there was something I could do or say to take their pain away or at least make it less.. But I know there are no words.  
My sister Kristy and my brother-in-law Brian were such an amazing help while we were in London. They opened their home to us, had many late night talks with us and sat with us while we cried. My nephew Jackson was the best medicine for our sadness and repeatedly cheered us up. I am so thankful to have such a loving family. 
I just want to say that Mike and his family are one of the strongest families I know. Even though making some unbelievably hard decisions, and being there with Brady while they took him off life support... They were strong. Through the process of planning a funeral and saying goodbye... They were so strong. I have so much love and respect for them and I am so thankful they allowed me to be there with them through this no matter  how hard it was. 
I also wanted to say thank you for the crazy amount of love and support that was given to the family and myself over the past few weeks. It was truly overwhelming and so appreciated!  
CHEERS BRADY

I struggled the past few weeks with my eating. I found it hard to get all of my protein in (hospital food) but more than that... I found myself wanting my comfort food. 
My husband may get mad for giving this analogy but when he is stressed or in a situation like that he tends to drink to help relax him. I am not much of a drinker.   Though I never considered myself an emotional eater.. I did tend to gravitate towards certain foods in stressful situations but since having gastric bypass I no longer have the ability to comfort myself through food. I did try a few times to be honest.. One day I had a bowl of soup and I forced down a whole tea biscuit... Which did not end well... 
There were a few times that I ended up making myself sick over the wrong choices. I was hard for me mentally to deal with what was happening so I tried to focus on my husband and family and tried to make  sure they were eating and doing alright.   In the future I am defiantly going to have to find a better way of coping!!!
I was away from the gym again for almost two weeks, and I'm finding it harder and harder to get back into the routine every time I get out of it.. And that was what I was afraid of when I started!  
Even though I am still losing, it has slowed down so much and I am fighting with these last 3 pound to push me under 200.  I've gone back to making my lunches and trying really hard to get my vitamins and protein in... Heading to the gym today after work so I'm hoping to break this stall ASAP!
I went to the dentist last week, and I had a bit of a breakdown in the office. It turns out that I have extreme bone loss in my teeth due to gastric bypass. It was explained to me that I am like a patient with Lupus. My body is low on nutrients, it is trying to take them from where ever it can.. Including my teeth. 
I have a doctors appointment tomorrow for blood work etc, and another dentist appointment on Friday for more X-rays and lord know what else. I'm very nervous to say the least. 
It's been a long road... And continues to be. I am ecstatic about losing so much weight... But there sure is a lot more that goes along with it.

It's hard to find the appropriate words,
 
I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry about yours and your family's loss.  Sending you a big hug.  I know that when you go through something like that, that it's hard to find comfort.  If I knew the answer, I'd be more than happy to share it.

I'm sure that once you push yourself to get back to the gym, you'll lose those 3 lbs.  You've started getting back on track, you're doign good.  The work out will make you feel better in more ways than one.  It'll help you lose, and it will give you encouragement that you can keep going and make it to your goal.  Even with all that's happened.

I've had problems with my teeth since before WLS, they are the most obvious signs when I forget to take my calcium.  I'm working on it, and you will too.  We'll both get there, even when we are "off schedule" we'll get back on.

I agree, we have a lot of learning that we have to do while on this journey, and each of our paths are similar yet very different.  And we have to listen to our bodies, to learn which way we should go.

All my best, and all my sympathy.
Cathy

I am so very sorry for you and your family's loss. As you said there are no words....After the sudden loss of our former neighbour's 26 year old son and some other things that happened I decided that if I was given this gift of a new life I needed to make the most of it for those that don't get the chance to live theirs. It has helped me focus and stay the course through emotional times of wanting to eat.....and if I do overeat, because we are not perfect. There are some great books on emotional eating and perhaps your social worker, or whomever you saw would meet with you to discuss what you have been through.
I congratulate your strength in sending this post, and wish you the very best!
Jackie

My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family. I am so sorry.

 I'm so sorry for your loss.  Hang in there.  To me it sounds like you are a very strong person.  You can do this. 

My heart goes out to you and your family. I wasn't going to respond because there are really no words of comfort. But then I decided to because I wanted you to know that things happen in our lives, it's how we deal with them that make us a success, I feel you are a success! You recongnized the pull towards food throughout this emotional time, but you are showing strength by realining your habits and getting it back under control. That makes sucess.
My heart goes out to you, and remember you are only human but you show strength when you refuse to give up.

First of all -   There really are no words to help in this situation.  Thankful you had wonderful people around to support you.

You coped the best you could in the situation.  The real test is the one you are on now, hopping back onto the wagon and taking control.

Hoping you find the strength to do so.....

There's not really much I can say other than I'm very sorry for you and your family's loss.  It is difficult to be going through so much and not be able to rely on food.  It is also difficult just to find the right foods when you are not at home.  I've had to do a lot of travelling the past few months due to my parents' health and know I haven't made the right choices, but no one said we would be perfect right?  As long as we keep up the fight...

All the best, and thank you for blogging about this.  It is really helpful for others to see that they are not the only ones struggling...

*hugs*

Laura

My deepest condolences to you and your family Dollface. I can't even imagine how hard this must have been for all of you.  Please take care