Honeymoon phase over ....my vent....

Well I was warned that following surgery the "honeymoon" phase would come to an end...and I certainly don't want to discourage anyone from having the surgery because I am still VERY thankful that I was provided with the tool of RNY surgery. 

I think the main issue's right now are the following:
1. The weight loss has significantly slowed down 
2. Over the holiday season there were SO many goodies that I could not and/or choose not to eat (ie: candies, baked goods and deserts) and I know I am mourning the loss of many of my comfort foods that I will NEVER be able to eat again 
3. I am inbetween sizes and don't want to waste my money of buying clothes right now (plus out of work and can't afford to buy clothes anyway)
4. My pouch is still very sensitive to so many foods and I am afraid to try new foods...I have not dumped but have vomited on 2 different occasions since surgery. 

Tonight for example, I was so looking forward to my dinner of pasta with lots of pasta sauce and ground beef. By the 3rd mouthful I was so full and tired of eating it - my passion to eat has turned into a chore.  

As I have noted - by no means do I want to deter anyone from having the surgery and I very thankful that I have been given this tool - I guess I am mourning my loss of my love affair with food.  It has been my best friend for over 45 + years and "it" no longer provides me with the pleasure and comfort that "it" had previously provided. 

I had developed a list prior to the surgery of  "comfort techniques"  to use to replace food....think it is time to dig out that list....  what have you turned to instead of food post surgery ?

Thanks for letting me vent.....

 I thought that the honeymoon period is suppossed to last around 18 to 24 months and your weight loss stops around that time, not just stalls or slows down??  Could your honeymoon period really be over so soon?

I imagine that I will also go through a period of grieving food...although I hope that there are still some foods that I will really enjoy.  Are you eating anything that you like the taste of?  I actually like cottage cheese and yogurt, so I'm hoping that I can still enjoy these flavours post-op.

I'm not sure what I will do for self soothing post surgery.  I hope to do some of the following to help myself cope with difficult emotional times as well as when I need to relax:

exercise
write in my journal
call a friend
listen to music
day dream the problem away
window shop
people watch
watch a movie
go to the lake
spend time in nature
pet my cat
play a game with my son
play online scrabble
clean my house (not fun, but at least a good distraction from worries)
burn incense or a scented candle
develop a meditation practice
repeat positive affirmations
read quotes from the Dalai Lama
Comedy shows, quotes, books (roseanne, al franken, kathy griffen, etc...)
take a nap

Of course, behaviour change is a real challenge...so I don't know how successful I will be at using these other techniques, but I'm going to give it my best effort.

Much good luck to you in finding comfort from your list of comfort techniques.

I think she may have meant "honeymoon" in the sense of the surgery euphoria and happiness we feel at first.  You are correct on the 18-24 months thing. :)

I no longer live to eat, I eat to live. I do enjoy really good food every day. I no longer eat crap food. I  do have a treat every now and then but I account for it with the rest of the food I have eaten that day. I cook from scratch and use the best possible ingredients.
I lost pretty consistently until I was just over 18 months out of surgery. After that I had to really work to lose the last 20 pounds or so. My surgeon had warned me that this would happen.

Linda

1) I think you have hit a stall. It usually happens quite a few times within the "honeymoon" phase. You really need to follow the guidelines!
2) STAY AWAY FROM THE JUNK! Why would you want to sabotage yourself?? Start fresh tomorrow and plan your foods properly everyday. HIGH proteins, LOW carbs! (I have co-workers that had RNY and many of  our co-workers call me the "food nazi" because I watch what I eat, I laugh at them but I wouldn't be the weight I am today if I indulged in all the crap so early out!) I still don't eat alot of crap, I "treat" myself.
3) If you go to support meeting- formal or coffee nights, often there are clothing exchanges and you don't need to but anything. It's great and when you are done with the clothes you can pass them on to the next person.
4) You are not even 3 months out yet. Now is the time that your can start experimenting with new foods and see what you can tolerate. You probably ate too fast and that's why you vomited. It still happens to me on occasion and I'm 16months out. Take your time, there's no rush.
Pasta might be too much. I can not really tolerate pastas and rice, they hate me (I vomit so I avoid them).

Embrace the food you are eating. It doesn't have to be a "chore". I still have a love affair with my foods just in smaller portions. I am a foodie, always have been, and probably always will be.


Good luck ;) We are here if you need us :)

Leanne

Hi Lynette
I think you have hit a stall...which will be longer if you continue to eat the junk.  It was definately a hard first Christmas and the temptations are definately there.  I have experienced too but need to change your thinking to eating to live not living to eat.  I remember this year getting excited about christmas dinner, then having to stop myself because it is not what it use to be.  Like others, I can't eat pasta at all or rice.  They don't sit well and are a constant disappointment when I do.  We are all different and will need to figure out what works for us.

Try and get back on track tomorrow, include exercise in your program and your stall will end.  Good luck!!!  You still have weight to lose and you can do it!!!! 

WHY WERE YOU EATING PASTA? Lay off it and carbs like  rice,  bread and potatoes, pizza and whatever...,what were you thinking? no wonder you are in a stall!

At your stage I had similar feelings about eating being a chore.
For me I realized that I was mourning because my familiar feeling of pleasure from eating was gone.
Eating did seem like work. I focused on my guidelines for eating healthy and I got used to it. As Linda said, you really do eat to live instead of living to eat.

My advice is to use this time of eating not being a pleasure to get into a routine of eating healthy. Get your body used to and wanting to eat healthy. I know it may seem hard to believe but when you stop eating crap and eat healthy you start to want healthier choices and the crap really seems like crap. LOL...-my scientific explanation! When I lived in Asia with my host family I had three traditional super healthy meals a day for cooked for me. I tell you when I came back to Canada and ate a normal style meal I thought Iwas going to puke. My stomach was on overload of fat and sugar. You really can get your body craving good stuff.

I think you are too early out to be out of the honeymoon phase. I dont think you should be making a dinner of pasta. Not seeing a lot of protein there. Certainly there is protein form the meat but I wouldnt recommend the pasta as your main source. Think protein first. Pasta to me means carbs first.

For me the honeymoon phase was yes, the slowing down of the weight loss but it also meant the cravings coming back. I came to a point where I was so scared and wanted the feeling of eating to be a chore to come back!! Stay away from the less healthy choices as long as you can!!!!

I think you will be able to eat goodies again and comfort foods but keep in mind the whole point is to not want to eat them or at least eat healthier versions of goodies and much less often.

I think your idea of focusing on other things which may replace your comfort eating is good. You may also want to focus on why you eat for pleasure.


All the best
-Yvonne

As far as the pasta goes, I think I first had it around 5 -6 months out.  I had 1/4 C of ww spaghetti and 1/2 C of very meaty sauce (and didn't finish the whole thing).  It's not a great food choice, but is better if you use ww pasta and go very heavy on the sauce, light on the pasta.

I don't know how much weight you've lost, but when you talk about your weight loss slowing, I'm wondering what that looks like for you.  Personally, I haven't lost more than 2 lbs in a week since my third week out.  And I've had three 3-week stalls (and by that I mean NO loss over a 3 week period).  I'm nearly 9 months out and am down 91.5 lbs.  Many people have lost more than that by 3-4 months out.  Although my weight loss has been slow, I'm very happy with it.  I never imagined that I would be this size at 45 years of age, and hope to lose more.  When's the last time you lost as much as you have in 3 months and can reasonably expect to keep it off?

Grieving you previous food habits is normal.  Hang in there.  It will get better!

Sounds like you were having a bad day.
Today is a new day and you will get back on track.

sounds like you've got a case of the (Hormone overload release) that comes with rapid weight loss.

now that the vent is over, You can enjoy the foods you loved before just in smaller quanitities, but wait awhile to reintroduce them into your diet.

I loved spaghetti and cried when i got full the first time after 2 fork fulls. But I eat Dreamfields now and take my time with it, i still dont' eat anywhere near what I used to but at least I can handle about 3/4 of cup now, and again, i take my time with it. I don't have it often but when i need my fix i make some.

I still have a loveaffair with food and sometimes I mourn the loss of all the stuff but then i remember what I can eat and how it makes me feel. so i turn to other choices. Theres so much out there to enjoy. Occasionally yes, i have a treat but most times I tell myself. "I choose not to eat that" and i buy into it if it's my choice without feeling deprived.

I'm 18 months out and still in the "honeymoon" phase. so there is plenty of time for you to reach your goal. Again I think you might be just having a bad hormone day. I had lots of them.

Hope you feel better about this.

J