Big Decision...

How do you make a decision that will affect the rest of your life...? Has anyone else went round and round with this? I want to go through with this surgery sooooooooo bad, but I still am not sure I am making the right decision. No more bailing out on a diet after two weeks... I know the good has got to out weigh the bad... Just getting there on that operating table is such a BIG BIG deal... Is hating being FAT with a passion enough to make all the sacrifices necessary???

hi from a former lorainite! i am replying without reading your profile- there is so much involved- yes hating being fat is important but are you doing this for vanity? for health? do you have co morbidities-diabetes sleepapnea etc? this is a lifetime change and the surgery only works on the body--you will hear that it is a tool-and it is--but the head is not operated on and must learn to change as well! my decision was when i could no longer play with my granddaughters or attend to personal hygeine in teh manner that i thought i should. i also was diagnosed with sleep apnea and have a very strong ( over 50 years) history of family diabetes-which i was hoping to avoid. i would be happy to correspond via email if you wish. you and only you can make this decision for yourself--- best of luck no matter what you decide! margo

Make a list of what you would like to do as you become thinner and list of what you cannot do now. Is this easy? No its one of the hardest things I have ever done. But it does or did show me what HUGE factor food played in my life, and still does. You have to do this for you, then for the others in your life. If people give you a hard time-fine, its you and not them. The surgery is to save your life, would you think twice about it if it was lets say heart surgery? All surgerys have risk involved, but we are taking risk everyday when we are morbidly obese. Theres lots of people on this site who have or are going through the same thing you are, so never feel like your alone. Stay positive!

Pamela, It is a big decision and will affect the rest of your life. You need to be ready for it and have support. I thought about if for a long time and decieded to go for it. I am so happy i did it is the best thing i could have done for me. Good luck on your journey. Pattie

Pamela, Your head has to change along with your body. You need to form a new relationship with food and learn other ways to deal with why you ate in the first place. Surgery is only the tool. It will only be successful if you find a new way to cope with stress, or whatever caused you to eat in the first place. I had to go through a year of couseling before I finally decided as well as research on WLS. I ate when I was happy, sad, bored, celebrating, socially, secretly etc. I'm changing my head to get ready for a successful surgery once I get approved. I have sleep apnea, diabetes, HBP, asthma, joint pain, etc. I can't walk up three flights of steps without huffing and puffing. I finally decided to save my life. I hope you choose to do this for you. Good luck on your decision. It wasn't an easy one for me or any of us. Luann

Hi Pamela! I'm also a former Lorainite - graduated from Clearview! We are similar in other ways too...I'm 35 and have 2 kids - 8 & 10! I knew it was time to make a change and go for the surgery (I had Lap Band surgery on 12/2/04) when I finally looked in the mirror and disgusted myself! I'm one of those who doesn't feel big and usually can see the pretty me no matter my weight, but I just couldn't get past it this summer. My feet and knees were starting to bother me every day and I was staying home while my hubby took the girls to the park and fishing. I just couldn't let life pass me by anymore. I had less to worry about as far as possible complications and recovery goes, but still had to decide that I would make the appropriate life changes (eating right, less, etc.) and be successful with surgery where all my past dieting had failed. So far, I do not regret my decision at all. I have not been at this weight since before having my 10 year old! Just do your research and read up on lots of profiles on this board, you learn so much from other's experiences. If you haven't yet, you can go to the Main Board and find lots of RNYers to read up on as well as those here - assuming you are looking at RNY! If you are looking at banding, there is a Lap Band Board too! Best of luck to you! Pam 218.3/177.6/130

Pam, Thank you for taking the time to write to me... I can't believe how nice everyone has been on this site. I felt like I was reading some of my own personality traits in your letter. The part about feeling Not So Fat and Still Feel Pretty applied to me, but for the last year or so that feeling has left and has been replaced with zero tolerance for the way I look and pretty much total discust. I just can't get past it and it seems to linger on my mind almost 24/7... I also wanted to ask you what made you decide on the banding vs. bypass... I wouldn't even consider bypass if I couldn't get it done laproscopically.... Still contemplating.... Take Care. Pam too...