My date was changed to this Tuesday
I got a call Friday afternoon that my surgery was changed from August 31st to this Tuesday the 17th. At first I was excited and now I'm scared. I thought I had more time to prepare. I didn't think I would be scared. I have a disabled daughter who's had surgery many times and I've never felt this scared before any of hers. Maybe because of the date change? How did all of you feel in the days right before surgery? Did any of you write letters to family members "just in case"? I did last night. The terrible thing is that my 15 yo came in a saw me writing and crying. Today she asked me if I wrote letters to family members. I was so caught off guard I didn't know what to say. I don't want to freak her out. Any suggestions or comments are appreciated.
WOW I would have mixed feeling also.I havent had sugery yet but I was wondering I should write letters. You know We all should tell the people that are close to us how we feel.But a letter is great , and something that a loved one would love to find if something would happen.You will be fine,do great and have a new life.Dont worry be happy.
Hi! 
First, I want to wish you the best with your upcoming surgery! We will all be praying and wishing well thoughts for your recovery.
It is so normal to run such a wide range of emotions. Especially for those of us who are "caregivers" be it children, spouses, parents, either with or without special needs.
You are about to undergo such a major life change. In a way, you will go through grief, because you are in a sense losing a certain part of you, and we all need to process that the best way we can. Sometimes we need to have that "advanced" grieving for the unknown. If you feel that writing letters "just in case" helps you cope, then so be it. You can not put a price on peace of mind. I would imagine that the date change has significantly unsettled you! It has jolted your mental focus, and pulled the rug right out from under you hasn't it? I have found when that happens, I just stop, literally, what I am doing, and breath. Just breath. Nice big deep breaths. Get some O's to the brain, and regroup.
I have also found that being upfront with my kids (to their ability to understand) is the best way to deal with things. Is your 15 yr old your special needs kiddo? If she is able to understand why you are feeling the way you do, just explain to her that you are feeling a little anxious about the surgery. Kids often have this inner wisdom and adultness (is that a word? LOL) that sometimes amazes me. If not, maybe just suggesting that you are getting things ready and that you are nervous and sometimes we cry when we are nervous. If she is the one who has had multiple surgeries, she will most likely be able to offer you some of her thoughts and feelings about what she goes through. When I worked with the kids in a hematology/oncology unit, I was just amazed at the amount of comfort that they offered to parents and staff regarding their care.
I wish you all the best. I know this is a really chaotic time. Take one day at a time, be well and let us know how you are doing. Don't lose focus on why you are doing this!!! You want a better life for you and your kids.
Valerie Curry, RN
Lap RNY OSU
07/10/2003
268/172/145
First, I want to wish you the best with your upcoming surgery! We will all be praying and wishing well thoughts for your recovery.
It is so normal to run such a wide range of emotions. Especially for those of us who are "caregivers" be it children, spouses, parents, either with or without special needs.
You are about to undergo such a major life change. In a way, you will go through grief, because you are in a sense losing a certain part of you, and we all need to process that the best way we can. Sometimes we need to have that "advanced" grieving for the unknown. If you feel that writing letters "just in case" helps you cope, then so be it. You can not put a price on peace of mind. I would imagine that the date change has significantly unsettled you! It has jolted your mental focus, and pulled the rug right out from under you hasn't it? I have found when that happens, I just stop, literally, what I am doing, and breath. Just breath. Nice big deep breaths. Get some O's to the brain, and regroup.
I have also found that being upfront with my kids (to their ability to understand) is the best way to deal with things. Is your 15 yr old your special needs kiddo? If she is able to understand why you are feeling the way you do, just explain to her that you are feeling a little anxious about the surgery. Kids often have this inner wisdom and adultness (is that a word? LOL) that sometimes amazes me. If not, maybe just suggesting that you are getting things ready and that you are nervous and sometimes we cry when we are nervous. If she is the one who has had multiple surgeries, she will most likely be able to offer you some of her thoughts and feelings about what she goes through. When I worked with the kids in a hematology/oncology unit, I was just amazed at the amount of comfort that they offered to parents and staff regarding their care.
I wish you all the best. I know this is a really chaotic time. Take one day at a time, be well and let us know how you are doing. Don't lose focus on why you are doing this!!! You want a better life for you and your kids.
Valerie Curry, RN
Lap RNY OSU
07/10/2003
268/172/145 
I think it is great its early. Then these emotions will be over and by the time the 31st comes,you will already have lost alot of weight. You will be fine and soon it will be all over. You are lucky you dont have to wait 2 more weeks. I am 5 weeks out and I would do it again in a heartbeat. You dont need 5 minutes to prepare believeme. Just take your own pillows and a fan,Congrats,you will be great,Love Cindy from Cincinnati
TH,
I wish you a speedy recovery.
I think it must be some what normal to be scared I know I was scared when I had my kids because the were sceduled c-sections the 2nd time round was worse for me with being scared before hand I mean having your body invaided is not a normal thing we do everyday and there are risk you know this going in all be it a slight risk
You have confidence in your sergeon?I do and that is what eases my mind
AS FOR writting to your kids I plan on writting a letters to them.I have to I lost my mom when I was 19 and I would give anything to have something from her giving me a little advise on life so I do plan to do alot of writting and I am giving them to my sister to hold for me in the event that something bad does happen and when I come out and I am fine we will dispose of the letters and my kids will be non the wiser they are 2 and 3
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