DOWN AND OUT

I have had a really really bad day I went to work today only to find out my only client has been put in a rehab and now I will be out of work for up to 90 days my clients family knew this was going to happen Friday I was there Friday and Friday after work I went and spent our last few dollars on a non refundable (now) deposit on a town house I am broke now with no hope of any work for 90 days I am sick over this I just do not understand how a company that is a state wide agency does not have enough work to give me some hours another thing that is bothering me is the fact that I put that deposit on that place and now I can not afford to have the electric turned on nor pay the rent so we can move in I was thinking things were really starting to work out for me but NO why is it I can not get ahead I am so down and I am worried about my babies they seen me crying today and ask why you crying mommy and that made it worse to the point I could not stop .......something has to give soon

hi nikki-hey gf! you need some me time it sounds like! can you send your little ones to a sitter or swap childcare with a friend for a few hours? i read your profile and wonder if you are on some antidepressants? maybe you should be if you aren't? they could help..mine do! fighting the insurance battle is a tuffie--and it doesn't make any diff what kind of ins you have!!! my gosh--i don't like your stepmom and i don't even know her!!!!get away from her ..... about the townhouse-wow--can't help you there- but --if you pray,,,talk to your God....things need to get better for you, hon,,,,for you and your little ones...you are taking great steps in trying to get this surgery and a better life...don't let the b******s get ya down!!!!!! email me if you wish--i have big shoulders....

nikki-please do not be offended by my 1st reply--i am concerned--i am a mom and gramma and a stepmom and a stepdaughter--- and i know what things can feel like-specially when you get to the point about crying in front of the kids or yelling about a poopy diaper-- you are trying so hard to make life good for the 3 of you --and it will happen--unfortunately...sometimes life throws curves in--and lemons--so--get that squeezer out and make lemonade! again--please don't be offended or angry--i do care and wish i could give ya a big hug....you sound very intelligent so sit down and think about the steps you need to take--and you may have to put yourself up at the very top of the list! i am serious about antidepressants...they help in a myriad of ways...are you a list maker? how are you on time management? do you allow some special time each day with the kids? go to a park or something and try to forget the troubles for a bit--they are at a wonderful age where everything is still new...bask in that for a few hours and then come back to see what you can do to make the rest of the week better-- i do know that waiting for wls is worse than the surgery or recovery....keep plugging away at it!!!!

I feel a lot better after a nights sleep I am going to have to contract my doctor soon I have also been noticing the depression starting to creep back really bad again I had it before right after my son was born I have put a call in to the agency to please look in all the 4 counties around me for work I am getting the kids ready now to take a ride and just enjoy not having to rush anywhere I know things are going to work out I will if nothing else ask my fater for the money to do the things I need to do for us thanks Margo I am in no way offended by your response I thank you very much for you frankness I am hanging in there

Geeeeeezzzzzzz Nikki, I just want to give you a big old hug!!! Girl I am so sorry things are going lousy. But her they can only get better. The others had some good ideas for you. I hope some of them help. I wish you could come to our meeting on Fri. Dr. C., Erin the dietitian and Nancy his nurse will be there. Let me know! ((((hugs)))) PJ Sept 2, 2004

Nikki, If you want out of the townhouse deal - go directly to the leasing agent and explain your situation. Believe me, they don't want a leasee who can't afford to stay. Since you did not know that the county would not have work for you, it's not something to be ashamed about. Just state the facts to them and see if they won't let you out of the contract for the time being. Just a suggestion - Donna PS Glad to hear that you are feeling better today!

well I left the house for a while today I just let what is going to happen happen I feel alot better I got home and made a few calls to set up some interviews and I am going on one tomarrow it will be PRN but it is something and it could very well develop into a full time position Donna I did contact the leasing agent I signed a contract that states 72 hours to pull out well I did this on friday afternoon and did not find out I was out of a job until Monday afternoon so it is binding I know everything is going to be ok maybe someone thinks I needed a vacation ????

getting out today for a bit and spending some time with he kids-airing out the cobwebs of the brain..it sound slike it helped! fingers crossed for the interview tomorrow... see-it's looking up already!!!!