Finding Myself Sinking into Depression

I had my surgery on May 21st, and I have been home and am finding it really hard to eat drink or take MORE meds than I did when I started.  It just really seems to me that I have made the WRONG decision!  My one incision is aching badly and so is the hole where they took out the drainage tube, I called about it and they said to call by Tuesday if it is still bothering me, I feel like a big baby if I call!  Tomorrow is my start for PHASE 4 so I do get to introduce some meats, maybe it will get better, it just doesn't feel like it!  I am sooo tired and my husbad keeps yelling at me for falling asleep, i can't take my pain medication because he says it makes me "LOOPY".  It just seems helpless to me and I am already Bi polar, and its like I am screaming inside and no one can hear me, I've tried to cry and nothing comes out!  Someone please Help me!

Hi Jakesmom, Don't despair.   This is something that will pass soon.  Hang on.  As you gain control of the pain and then start to see the weight drop, you will begin to perk up.  Don't hesitate to bug the docs at the clinic  if you are having issues with the drainage tube hole.  Mine was infected and I was unaware for quite a while.  Dr. Schauer's team is exceptional and they will help.  You have been through a huge surgery and you will be very fatigued for sometime. I didn't begin to lose that sleepy feeling until after the first 6 weeks and do not allow your husband to control your need for pain meds.  Nothing brings on depression like pain and this is your body and recovery, not his.  Continue to turn to the boards for help and begin to develop a support system of friends and relatives, if you have not already.  Also, look for a support group to join or join the group at the clinic.  One last suggestion, get in touch with the psychologist at the clinic for added support.   Good luck and don't feel alone.  We are all in this together!

Your body has gone thru a major surgery less than 3 weeks ago.  You need time to heal.  I think its totally normal to be tired (I was, still am at 7 weeks out).  Keep trying to get your water in, and your protein in, that may help you feel better too.  If you can't take the prescription pain meds, have you tried just plain tylenol, it might be just enough to take the ache away.  Your hormones are also on a roller coaster right now and that will make you moody, so hang in there; it will get better. Good luck Caroline

"I am sooo tired and my husbad keeps yelling at me for falling asleep, i can't take my pain medication because he says it makes me "LOOPY"" You just had major surgery.  You're supposed to be tired.  Pain meds have a tendency to make you "loopy".  That's why we don't take them when we fly airplanes, defuse bombs,  or operate steam rollers.  Yes, you need some exercise, but you also need rest so you can heal. Here's some advice from a former Sanduskian: Go back and see the doctor and TAKE YOUR HUSBAND WITH YOU.  It sounds like he needs a better understanding of the situation and what he can do to support you.  My prayers are with you, Dan 

sounds like your husband wants some attention try to create a time even if it is one hr when you focus on him and be interested in what he is doing

Being tired is normal.  I was tired it seemed most of the winter.  I had my surgery the day after Christmas. My hubby and my son are bipolar and depression is very easy to sink into for those of us that arent BP.  Take care of your needs first and foremost. Get in protein, meds, water and vitamins. Try to move around when you dont fell as tired.  When your body wants to sleep let it and take the pain meds when you need them. Loopy or not it helps you.  Dont expect to get back to a "normal" routine for a while.  Its okay to be off you had major life changing surgery. Best of luck you are in my thoughts and prayers.

I don't think I can help you but.....I kind of went through the same thing.  Did I do the right thing? Had the foamies for two weeks and everything came back up looking like shaving cream.  My incision split open and got a big hematoma; got a big hernia three weeks out........on and on.  I got off the pain meds, got outside no matter the weather and spent time walking and walking and walking.  The air refreshed me and the exercise energized me.  Eat what you are suppose too, drink what you are suppose too and move around.  If you can't shake it, then seek professional help.  There is no harm asking for help.  Don't worry about your DH right now, you have had major surgery.  Tell him to cut you a brea****il you get back on your feet.  But....you have to do it.  No one else.  Remember why you had the surgery.....to regain your life and you WILL!!!! Just takes time..I'll be thinking about you, my dear.  I'm an old worn out woman of 56 and if I can do it you can too.  Get you a walking tape for the house, go walk at Walmart, go walk at the mall.  Exercises cause good things in your brain and that will help you state of mind.  Don't listen to yourself right now, just do what has to be done! Nancy J.

i think you get the picture that you should be taking care of you???? i found that i still required naps up til almost 6 weeks out...could any of your tired be about the fact that you are probly also caring for your three beautiful boys???? has hubby taken over on doing the cooking? the laundry? the running around associated with lil ones???? sorry--i just cannot buy that your hubby is on you for falling asleep--unless it's while you are driving teh car! i agree-take him with you to the drs--and take soemthing fro pain... sorry-i'm old too and just don't caut slack fro uncaring folk (hubby's etc) and-as many have said-you just had major surgery!! goodness girl...not even 3 weeks ago....... ok-deep breaths...we are on your side.... (i'm near fremont-do you need a visitor??)

Thank You everyone so much your words have made me feel a little better.  It's not that my husband has not been completely supportive and has taken care of the 3 kids, its that he has become a drill sargeant!  Get up, Don't sleep, can't take pain meds if you wan to drive anytime soon(DUH), Have you drank enough water, did you chew that the right # of times, and don't forget NO NAPPING!  I'm trying, nothing sounds good to me not even Crystal Light which I used to drink non stop, food is not appealing to me, I am at a loss.  I do regularly see a shrink and a counselor(in Fremont), but had to put them on stand by because of pain meds, but I am scheuled to see them.  I see the shrink and Dr. Schaur at the Clinic the 26 of June (Going early would mean hubby taking another day off work).  I can't decide if "Drainage" hole is healing or if it is just red, husband of course says its just healing, it hurts to get up from seated position...I hope I am not just babbling, I appoligize if I am.  I have no where else to go, Thank you all so much!

no-you are bot blabbering...mad eperfect sense.... wait til you start eating -he'll become a food nazi and thsoe are no fun! sorry1  we're here for you to vent......pm me if you want to ....i can only offer hugs and prayers and some in person time if it would help....