Is it helpful... (x post)

Sometimes I believe people are so busy having opinions they forget to think. Sometimes you are just being hurtful for no other reason then believing you have 'it' all figured out.  If you don't know the whole story of somebodies journey then ask. If you don't want to ask then don't judge.  This is an open forum and you have the ability to write whatever you feel like.  It doesn't always mean that you should. Some people will ask for tough love and by all means if your heart is in the right place then give it.  Most of the time people want support and if you are unable to supply that then keep on walking.  You DO NOT have to reply to every post, even the ones that make you shake your head in disbelief at what you perceive to be that persons flaws.

Kindness is absorbed by people, practice it...it's a sign of intelligence to reach someone with kind words especially if the message is a hard one to take.  Blunt, hurtful judgements are a sign of intolerance.

If you can't tolerate someone on the board block them and you won't have to see their posts any more.

In a couple of tired/off moments I have written and said things that came out wrong and were not helpful. Not purposely hurtful but just something that came out wrong. I've gone back and apologized, deleted and regretted what I've said. I'm learning to stop before I post and make sure I really want to say that to the person.

Before you speak think...people don't put themselves out here to be told off, beat up or tough loved into your truth.  They come here for support to get through their struggles and fears.  They also want someone to cheerlead them on when things go well.

Be kind...most people on this board have had enough hurt from other sources, they don't need more.

Nicely said 

Wow.  Was there something said in particular that prompted this?  Because it sounds like you're personally upset over something.  Can you post a link or links to the threads that have upset you so that we can understand?

Basically, I agree that we should always be kind.  We  never know what's going on in someones life - only what they post here. 

The issue I see most of the time is that what is meant as a kind and caring response is mis-construed as rudeness or incivility.   Usually this happens when someone asks for advice and they are obviously in need of some type of help.  Many posters (myself included) feel it is actually more "kind" to tell the truth in a manner that is blunt enough to be of some value and meaning.  It doesn't  mean a poster doesn't want to help.  But help isn't always about soothing someone's feelings, especially if they are doing something that may bring harm to themselves.

If someone posts and all they want to see is positive feedback they should be up front about that.  Most of us assume, sometimes wrongly, that those who post questions and concerns are looking for some truth, not just a bunch of "atta boys".

As with beauty, true kindness must be seen through the eyes of the beholder.

Just felt like sharing my opinion.

Two members ripped her apart for venting on the VSG board about all of her hydration struggles. They basically told her that she brings it on herself and just wants attention. 

And we wonder why participation keeps declining.  

Sometimes support means tough love. We may not like it - we may not appreciate it.  But sometimes - unless we push ourselves - we are going to fell or die... while nice meaning onlookers will just look at you and say" I am so sorry... you poor thing...." while some of the "tough love people will tell you to shake it off and try harder ..... "

A little bird was flying south for the winter.  It was so cold; the bird froze up and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.  As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.  The dung was actually thawing him out!  He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

 A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!

 The morals of this story are:

• Not everyone who drops **** on you is your enemy.
• Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend.
• And when you're in deep **** keep your mouth shut!

now who is being mean? ey? 

Dontcha wish you quoted her?