Thank You MaryEllen!!!  Thats a great poem.  I would love another support group,  and we did have one here til the program shut down,  but even the last year or so that it was available,  I could not attend,  due to my high volume of regular clients that I have accumulated since going into business myself.  I have a salon in my home,  and a good share of my clients have to come evenings,  and our closest meeting was right within that time frame.  I would love to have a weekend Saturday morning meeting say once or twice a month.  That would be awesome. 

This is another reason why I have not started a workout program,  is my time constraints,  I work 4 days a week 8:30 or 9:00 am til around 7:30 or 8:00.  I am too tired and have to make dinner by the time I am done working.  I could not go work out then come home and make dinner,  I wouldnt be eating until 10pm.  And mornings,  I have enough time to get around, get the shop ready,  make coffee etc.  I really need another good 6 hours in a day,  to get done what I need to and have time for me. 

I was a very very heavy smoker once upon a time 2 1/2 to 3 packs a day.  I quit in 2002 before I went to Cosmetology schooling,  and I knew I eventually would like to get the RNY,  and I wanted to have that out of my life before hand.  I am still NOT smoking.  I dont want them anymore and never ever have cravings for cigarettes thank God.  I used the patch,  but first had to get in the right mindset to be able to let go of a lifelong friend and say good bye forever.  It was my biggest vice controlling me at the time,  besides food.  Maybe thats what I need to do to look at bad foods in this same way,  I think I just had an Ah Ha moment.  Im gonna try to look at my trigger foods this way and say goodbye forever,  and if only I could keep my husband from wanting them and having them in my face.  Plus I have a closet full of great clothes that I cannot fit into anymore.  I am on a mission.

Congrats Susan!!!!

ALWAYS remember that 
ACCOUNTABILITY+SUPPORT=SUCCESS!!!!!!!!!!! 

 its so hard to eat right. now that halloween is here i have been eating candy. i dont ever buy junk food. yes dr. cole is in bath,ny. i kno my records went to my normal doctor. i smoke also. i am trying to slow down my drs nurse never calls me back to get on something for smoking. i just had a break that lasted 2 years. so now is not a good time to quit but i will try. 

I did hear that they are going to open soon again,  or maybe they already have.  But I have not been contacted at all to let me know of this.  I only found out from a client of mine who is a nurse at Arnot.  I do know that Dr. Cole is still practicing in Bath, NY.  I think more of in a general practice I think.  I am assuming my paperwork is stil with Arnot,  as I didnt know who to have it sent to.

At my lowest 147,  I felt great,  looked great except for the typical excess skin.  But maybe factors are the cause of my 43 pound gain.  At 2 years out,  I started working for myself and was scared and stressed,  my father was dying with a very fast cancer,  we bought a  house and built on an addition to put my shop in,  and now work from home by myself for many many hours a day sitting on my butt, then some serious health issues with my daughter,  etc.  So,  I know I am stress eating,  or letting cravings drive my crazy til I give in.  I eat very late at night due to my work schedule,  and I do  not get an exercise, and I am in perimenopause.  I know these are all excuses,  but they are the reasons I can think of that I let myself get off track.  I need to find my way out,  I am tired of hurting all the time and looking and feeling very uncomforable in my own skin and clothes. 

I will conquer this,  I just have to find my inner strength to get me there again.