Tavia Report by Her Husband

WARNING: This is long... what can I say... I write for a living. Not necessarily well, but I write. Hi all, Anyone remember the Blues Traveler song that had the following lyrics - "Why you wanna give me the runaround?" Well, that would not only be a question that Tavia and I continue to ask ourselves in our heads, but also our theme song. If we ever get remarried, THAT song will definitely be the one we dance our first dance to!!! As you can imagine, we need some humor so that we don't get totally consumed by frustration. Well, folks, it has been a comedy of errors lately and a great source to elevate my blood pressure. I don't blame anyone... I'll say that up front... but the confusion that has ensued recently definitely has me (and I'm sure Tavia) disappointed. Yesterday, Tavia went to the ER to deal with her nausea issue... at least that was the hope. As you all may know, it's nothing but a waiting game when you're dealing with the ER unless, of course, you're bleeding profusely, a convict getting treated, or some act of nepotism gets you bumped up to the front of the line. Being that Tavia was neither bleeding, a felon (at least that I know of), or related to someone on the hospital board, she was at the ER for a long time... Between the waiting, Tavia had multiple tests done to determine what was going on - an ultrasound, blood, urine work a catscan, that nuclear test, and a sonogram. Fortunately, and it's funny that this is fortunate, the ultrasound found gall stones and a lot gas (You guys have a "barf" icon and no "fart" icon? What's up with that?!?!). It's fortunate because at least there is some sort of explanation for all the pain that Tavia is feeling. Also, she also had some sort of biliary chronic somethingorother sphincter on her gallbladder... ... pre-cise-ly. In any case, the other tests were normal, so I guess this put the doctors in a quandary... what to do with Tavia Velasco? After much deliberation (see: waiting), it was determined by the ER doctor (in conjunction with the on-call surgeon, Dr. Katz, from Dr. Gellman's practice) that Tavia should be discharged. BUT WAIT!!! Correctly, Tavia asked what Dr. Gellman thought as he was her surgeon. The ER doctor didn't really have an answer. Okay, fine. So, Tavia asked about the repercussions of going home - would the pain subside then come back... is there anything that you can do about the sphincter problem... and most important to Tavia and a lot of people that frequent hospitals - CAN I GET PAIN MEDICINE?!?!?! With all of that asked, the doctor then said that Tavia could be admitted, monitored for pain and nausea, and see where to go from there... POSSIBLY having the gall bladder (which I've dubbed "Pesky") removed, but then she would have to wait ("And now, the winner for Most Common Activity in a Hospital goes to... ahem, can I have the envelope please... thank you... the winner is WAITING!!!" Queue the orchestral music). Honestly, it seemed that the ER doctor was pushing us towards going home, which is fine by me as I'd always choose that over the hospital, but I and I definitely know Tavia want to get this over with. Being frustrated, Tavia concluded that we should probably just go home then and call her surgeon and primary doctor (Sandy Ratner is one COOL mofo of a doctor by the way) to see what they think. Although, I think it was pretty much a done deal that the gallbladder was going to go the way of the hairsprayed mullett look. Okay... fine. Give us our pain medicine and we'll blow this joint quicker than Speedy Gonzalez after consuming canes of pure sugar! Off we went, pain prescription in hand, as happy (and frustrated) as can be. But, little did we know that there were machinations at hand behind the scenes that would totally confuse us, frustrate us more, and honestly enrage us when we awoke this morning. So, our plan of attack this morning when we woke up was to call Dr. Gellman's office to see what he thought and if we should (okay, really if HE should; we'd do a messy job if you ask me) remove the gallbladder, and if so, if we could schedule an operating time. I dialed the digit**** the extension for the Bariatric Coordinator, and told her what happened the night before and asked if Dr. Gellman was around. He wasn't, but he did schedule Tavia to have her gallbladder removed today at 11am. WHAT?!?!?!?! Understand, it was about 9:30am and this was THE ABSOLUTE FIRST TIME that I or Tavia had heard about this. So... Dr. Gellman did want to take out the gallbladder. Okay, good. BUT it was going to be in an hour and a half?!?!?! NOBODY told us!!! As far as we knew, everything was psuedo hunky dory when we left the ER last night and the doctors said that we could leave and just to follow up with Dr. Gellman (we have the discharge paper that states that if you don't believe me ). BUT, in fact, Dr. Gellman didn't want Tavia to leave the hospital at all last night, but wanted her admitted from the ER and have the gallbladder removal procedure TODAY! WHAT?!?!?!?! So, the Bariatric Coordinator (whom I personally like myself) told us to get to the hospital as soon as we could. So, we did... thinking that Dr. Gellman was probably there waiting and expecting us to show up for him to work his magic on Tavia. We get there to Same Day Admissions and come to find out: A) Dr. Gellman was on vacation B) Dr. Gadaletta would have to perform the surgery C) Dr. Gadaletta would have to perform the surgery after all his other surgeries that day because it seemed he didn't know about it D) Dr. Gadaletta and ourselves really didn't want to spend the day waiting to get the procedure done... understandable on his part as he IS a busy man And all the while this is happening, ANOTHER activity besides waiting took over my being - I was asking myself - "What the frag happened?" I was honestly dumbfounded. To make a long story short (too late for that!!!), Tavia DID NOT have the surgery today, but instead will have it Thursday at 12:30pm with Dr. Gellman. But the trip wasn't wasted as Tavia did get to do all her presurgery testing stuff done. She's been there so many times this year that all the staff members were saying hi and checking up on her. You would think that Tavia was giving away free TVs or something so many people were coming to say hi. In any case, I'm not going to play the blame game because it's fruitless and nobody is going to want to be accountable for this. So, I'll shrug my shoulders and just wonder where the breakdown in communication happened. I just don't know how that happens. But, it's sort of like when you played "Telephone" as a kid... the message will always be something different by the last person. All we can do is hope for the best. Not just for my lovely wife, but also for all of you. I want to especially thank you all for all the support that you've shown Tavia. This board has been a great help. And now, I'll leave you to your regularly scheduled posts. Tavia's husband and a lover of prolix - Dennis

OH MY GOD!!!!! Dennis thanks so much for posting this. Where is Tavia now? Did they admit her? All I can say is that North Shore Hospital f**king sucks. I hate that place and I know Dr. Ratner does too. Please tell Tavia that I send her my best and I'll call her either there at home or at the hospital. Joanne

Hey Joanne, No problem with the post. Tavia would post, but she's not up to posting. I don't blame her. As far as what you said about North Shore... all I can say is that I DIDN'T say it. Dennis

Dennis, Hun thanks for much for letting us know.. ~Hugs to you BOTH~ I can not believe all this s@&t that you guys have been through, I think I would run from the hospital and the surgeon that this point. To many problems for me. I will call tonight and hoping she is home..... Debra P

Hey Debra, Thanks for the hug! And we've thought about running from the surgeon... but since Tavia and I are married, the old ball and chain is preventing us from getting very far. Dennis

Hi Dennis, Thank you so much for updating us on our sweet Tavia ! I have been wondering what was up as she is usually posting daily . She has spoken with me on the phone too and I was getting ready to call her if I did not hear anything from her today ! I will hold off on calling until she comes home from her GB surgery. Tell her that I am thinking of her and have her in my thoughts and prayers ! She is a very strong young lady to have gone through what she has and still be kicking butt the way she is !!!!! She is also very lucky to have you for support ! I am sure that means the world to her ! Hopefully this will be the last time she has to deal with surgery . I really wish her well and can't wait to chat with her again ! Thanks again Dennis ! Take care, Carol

Hey Carol, Thanks for the kind words... much appreciated! It's amazing how much Tavia has gone through and not only survived, but persevered against. I've been amazed from day one. Dennis

Dennis, I always thought that our hospital up here in the boonies was unique in the way they make you wait, misdiagnose you, are rude, have ER doctors who couldn't get a job anywhere else, Did I SAy MAKE YOU WAIT?!? Apparently I have found as a patient, and as an RN, that even hospitals with good reputations, like NOrth Shore suck when it comes to ERs. I can't believe Tavia wasn't doubled over from the gall stones, unless they weren't moving. But getting them out is the best bet. Hopefully this will be the answer to all of her problems, and the last of her surgeries! Please tell her I am thinking of her & your family & wish her only the best. She is a sweet person, & she must remind me of someone I know, because I feel connected to her. Linda

Linda, Nah... waiting is a universal thing if you think about. All the good things you have to wait for - getting into the college you want to get into, finding the right person in your life, kids, but most of all a Boston Red Sox World Series (actually a Yankees fan, but since I'm a part-time sports writer, I had to mention the BoSox)... it's all worth the wait. Just a little longer Cub fans! In any case, hopefully this will be the end of all the suffering and waiting. Thank you for your kind words, Linda. And who does Tavia remind you of, out of curiosity. Dennis

Hi Tavia and Dennis, I am so sorry that you both had to deal with all of that frustration. I know first hand how horrible it can be to endure the ER "game" and to do so when you are feeling terrible, worried and full of questions. It all adds up to a bad time. I am so hopefull that with the gallbladder gone a life anew will begin for you. I bet almost anything that your gall stones are the culprit of much of your anguish. I can't wait to hear of your new life, free of pain and suffering, being able to eat almost anything without any struggles. Brighter days ahead! One thing is for sure...it sounds like you have a good life together, and I'm so glad to hear that there is a lot of support for Tavia. You both seem like awesome people, who deserve a good life. Take Care...I will be thinking of you.