Worried about DH Probs

Hi everyone... hope everybody is enjoying this weather... I'm waiting for my daughter to wake up from her nap so I can take her to the park , meanwhile, I've been reading a few posts on here about problems with spouses after their weight loss.... I see that alot of significant others start to get jealous and start to second guess fidelity in their marriages. The other night my husband made a comment to me that worried me alot. He said that once I lose the weight, I'm going to leave him and find someone better.... He's a bit overweight, but I am definatley bigger than he is.... and I would never think of looking for someone else... He is my life, the only one I have truly loved, and he makes me so happy and treats me like gold... The thing is I dont think I can handle him always bringing this up... I dont want him to start with the jealousy thing, I was in a bad relationship in my early 20's that was all related to jealousy.... I was miserable and dont want to my marriage to end up like that... any suggestions? I know I'm jumping the gun here, but I want to clear it up with him before it's too late and emotions take over... Has anyone gone through something like this? Gia

I've read some stuff on the boards too. One statement stood out to me. It was something like if you have a strong marriage now, it'll be ok. Just be open and honest with him and show him how much you care about him. He'll be fine once he see's your feelings haven't changed. Also a warning about emotions. Warn him that your emotions will be here and there after surgery. It will take a while to get your mood back to normal. I find I am very emotional more so than I was before. Knowing this will help you relax after an "episode". Good luck my dear. I hope everthing works out ok.

Hey there Gia! I am so sorry to hear that he (your DH) is feeling this way Have you sat down and discussed this issue with him? He may need som reassuring about this situation. You know you are not going anywhere but he himself deep inside feels insecure about the weight loss in you and you changing. Just tell him how you are feeling and how you feel about him and that this should not be an issue because you love him for him! I hope this helps some. Have a great day! {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}} Evelyn 247/134/past goal

Hi Gia, I too know what you are talking about. I am in a relationship with a man who I absolutly adore. He has given me 2 beautiful boys and a wonderful home. He is also very insecure. I have told him sooooo many times how important he is to me and how much I love him. he also is a little overweight, but no where near as heavy as I was. His father has also put stuff in his head like, "you know she's gonna leave you when she looses all that weight." I cried so hard when he told me that. It really hurt. But on the positive side of all of this, we are actually getting married in Aug. this year. I don't believe my fiance's problem is jealousy as much as insecurity. He tells me he's not jealous, but who honestly isn't? I know people look at me different now, but I look at it this way....they didn't look at me and like me when I was heavy why should I look at them and like them now!!! Stay positive Girl!!! Keep the marriage top priority, he will overcome this, really. Tell him what you have been telling him and let him know about me if you need too. We all have been there!! Good luck! Karry 311/200/167 (goal)