Silly concern but yet???????????

Before joining this group, I had joined a yahoo weight loss surgery support group for the area in which I live in. I have been reading their posts daily for the last three months and my concern is the women who runs the group seems to make it her personal agenda to promote one surgeon and basically says that the other area surgeons are no good and you will have nothing but problems if you go do one of them, but yet she will not put any statistics down in the group as far as motality rates, infection, vomiting, nutritional care, ect....... we are just suppose to take her word for it. Is this the way a support group should be run for those who are considering having sugery and are looking for support. Am I just over reacting to this whole thing? Maybe I am just too sensitive, but I don't feel that someone has the right to bash surgeons if they are not going to give the statistics to go with it (put your money where your mouth is so to speak). This is a very important surgery and if someone has information that could save your life because of the surgeon you pick shouldn't they be willing to give that information? Guess I am just a little confused and upset about what some consider "help and support". If you think I am just overreacting and blowing this out of proportion please say so. I would really like opinions here. Thanks Sally

Hi Sally, I don't think you are overreacting. If she is doing that, it's not right, but if that's how she runs her group, then it's obviously not for the benefit of everyone else. The only thing that I would add is that other than mortality rate, infection and before and after care, it's hard to determine how good the surgeon is by the side effects a patient has. By that I mean that 15 to 20 percent of patients will suffer some side effect such as hair loss, nausea, etc, which has really nothing to do with the surgeon, but each individual's body's response to the surgery. I have a great surgeon who did my wls but I had a ton of nausea and a stricture after the surgery and it's not his fault by any means. I have found a few yahoo groups that are quite good and do not bash surgeons at all and obesityhelp.com is a fantastic resource of information and help from other WLS-ers. Sue

Hi Sally. Nobody should be doing what she is doing. You are not wrong for being upset. My best advice however is to do your own research. When you find a surgeon you are happy with research him/her yourself, ask many questions, try to find people who have used this surgeon. As the surgeon what their success rate has been, what there follow up is like. Use the interenet and this site to research. When i had my surgery i googled and emailed and asked and asked until i knew everything about the surgeon i used. This is your life , this is a major surgery. I know people *****search buying a new car harder then their surgeon. What i always say is stick with positive people. If the person in the support group is pointing to all the negatives about these surgeons stay away. Why isnt she posting all the good surgeons reviews. You need to find a more supportive positive atmosphere for your support. Use this site and put in your area and locate surgeons in your plan and area. THen read what people have written about them. Then start your own google and research and come to your own conclusions. I wish you luck. Keep us posted. LisaMarie

WOW sally i am sorry your finding that on the other support forums of yahoo. I have to say i have never seen that here. OF course we all love our surgeons of choice but no one puts down anothers. I guess sally i wouldnt hang on that support forum...and make yourself comfortable here. SORRY your seeing that its not support!!!! ANYWAY all the best and i look forward to getting to know you thru your posts here!

Sally- This is why it is important to educate and research your doctor and and the whole weight loss surgery process. Don't just rely on the advice of one person. Everyone seems to think their doctor is the best. Which is understandable since wls is such an emotional live changing event. I remember pre op when I was attending my doctor's monthly support meetings it was common to hear other members bash other local doctors. Don't be surprised that the woman who runs the other group is basing her facts more on personal feelings, not factual information. Your concern is definitely not silly. donna

Hi Sally You are correct to be concerned. A group should not be ran that way. Putting down other surgeons who are probably very successful is not the way to encourage others. You have to do your own research. Check for those surgeons on this web site. If they are on here, you will find info about them and patient testimonials. Sometimes people tend to baby their own surgeon forgetting there are others out there who are just as reliable if not better. If you have any other questions of concerns or just want to chat, we are here for ya. Good luck and stay away from any negetive feedback on anything. It just causes a great deal of confusion for you. Good luck..........Marie

Hi Sally, You know what they say about opinions...... Well, statistics are one thing but opinions are another. You might want to check out this link: http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/bariatric+surgeons+in+new+york.html Good luck! Hugs, Karen

I just wanted to thank everyone for their replys. I have only been on this forum for about a week and have only posted a few questions, but the care and concern that comes from the members here is sincere. I have not gotten that same kind of response from the other group. Most of the responses to questions are from the group leader and not many responses from the group members themselves. I often wonder why that is........ oh well. I am going to stay away from that group. I just get such a weird "gut" feeling about things that are said. It is just not professional to make all these claims of all this knowledge you have and not be willing to share it with others. Things just don't add up. I will stick with obesityhelp.com and all the wonderful members here. I went back and re-read the testimonies from patients whose surgeon I have choosen and they again confirmed that I made the right choice. Thanks for all the help. I am sure you will be hearing from me again. Sally

Hi Sally, No you are not overreacting and dont think that way. You have to remember that some people will always have something to say b/c that is just how some people are...but remember that not everyone is like that. Sometimes you just need to find the correct people and need to 'weed' through the 'over-opinioned know it alls'. From my experience some of these people love the support meetings way too much and need something else to focus on.(just my opinon/experience). Keep in mind that not everyone is like that. I can tell you that we on the NY OH board are a great bunch of non-judgemental supportive people. Most of us have used different surgeons but that really doesnt matter, who the heck cares you know? Good luck and keep on posting! Take care and be well.