FATTEST FRIDAY!~~~~

Well i am gonna type what i have been thinkin all day.. my surgery is Wednesday and i kept thinkin "Is this my fattest friday?" will all my fridays to come be on the loosing side? Is this my last friday feeling so sad about my weight? I know this is the beginning of a journey but i am ready to say buh bye to fridays going home from work and planning what i will stuff my face with all weekend.. Other than thinkin of food all day, Liquid diet, need i say more.. anyways i feel pretty crabby.. food filled me in many ways.. i am feelin kinda empty..for the 1st time i am really figuring out how much i depended on food.. im ready to let go of this "relationship".. it is hard.. but i am workin on me.. not food.. I dont wanna be the big girl with the pretty face or the funny girl or the girl who knows fashion but is too big for it to look good on.. wanna be the woman i am, without the food.. I was remembering comments today, comments that ya think you will forget and get over comments that family friends or even strangers make that settle in your brain and you never let go of. Why do we remember the "bad" and never the compliments? My dad when i came down to go to the prom told me i looked like a scrubwoman.. my brother who i overheard say to someone "I have a fat sister too" the cute guy in high school on the bus that screamed "FAT SWEAT!"one day when i got on . the love of my life pinching my inch when he hugged me and sayin i was large and in charge.. my 3 year old niece asking me "why are you fat nee-nee?" I need to heal and i plan on letting go and staring over in Mexico.. makin it about me and for me.. casting all these things in the water and saying good bye. Thank you my OH friends you are God are my strength..

Yes JV these feelings are so normal. We have heard these things and dealt with these things for a very long time. It is not an easy journey, not an easy transformation. You will still hear negative things for a while after the surgery but they fade with time. You yourself will need to focus on all the positives this surgery will bring you. I still have some issues as i posted in my other post who do i trust. But it gets better with time. You learn to feel comfortable in your new you. Its not easy as this surgery is not done on our brains..That is where therapy and support groups become so important. Learn to suround yourself with positive people. People who understand this process. Go to a theapist if you can. But remember it is a positive step. YOu are starting a journey that is going to change your life forever ...It was the best thing i ever did for myself and my family. I wish you all the luck and we are here for you .... LisaMarie

Good Luck with your surgery and I hope you have a speedy recovery. God Bless, Betsy