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No need to have anyone on any "side". This isn't Junior High school. I speak only for myself and stand behind what I say/write (including apologizing occasionally when necessary).
FWIW, I am six years out and I have gone on record repeatedly to say that if I were making they decision now (the sleeve wasn't available 7 years ago), *I* would have the sleeve instead of the RNY because I never liked the idea of re-routing my intestines... but at age 45, with a lifetime and family history of morbid obesity, a BMI of 57, and numerous diet failures, RNY was my last option. So you will never find me blindly defending RNY or ever pushing someone into having it. If anything, you are far more likely to see me trying to convince them to be sure it is their only option.
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
Yes, there were a couple of people who went off the deep end and questioned whether your post was genuine, and a couple of people (people who are newly out and may still be fearful about their decision) were defensive about the surgery, but the vast majority of us tried to help CALM your fears by letting you know that, wherever you got the info from, it wasn't accurate, and we supported you in believing that if your were that anxious (since the first approach was clearly not helpful) you weren't ready to have surgery. MOST of the people *****sponded were supportive and attempted to help.
Lora.
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
on 11/28/13 3:23 am
Now quick go tell everyone so you can have more people on your side! Hurry!
on 11/28/13 3:17 am
Lora, I'm not sure if your a forum cool girl or what, but actually when I expressed FEARS I had, all that were very possible occurrences, expressed that I was scared out of my mind, many of you offered nothing but rude comments, suggested I was faking being fat or eligible for surgery and many were defensive of the surgery. If it works, it should speak for itself, not have a bunch of snarky, snide people behind it. You are right, there were like 2 people who were kind and encouraging in those posts. And if I observe disgusting bullying behavior I can call it out, and if someone wants to delete it, then ill go cry in the forum corner? I guess. I actually stated a few times the fears I had, that I have anxiety which at the time was very high, and I asked for proper responses. I don't need people saying rude things and accusing me of faking. Lol it's so stupid. And it goes to show some of you are just staplers, and have nothing better to do but chime in and speak your big forum words. I found very few people on this forum to be encouraging, instead you are like die hards and any naysayers better watch their forum backs because omg the former fat girls stick together and run those mouths. What ever! No one cares.
I agree with everything you wrote here. Many people DO have surgery before they try everything else, and many people DO regain weight because they go back to eating the same way they did before surgery, and I absolutely believe that surgery should be a last resort. Many people DO have surgery because they believe it will be easier than trying to change their life on their own (and, in some ways, it is). Many people who have it are not psychologically ready or not committed to changing their behavior.
This post shows that you have given serious thought to the issue, and I wish you all the best in your effort to lose and keep he weight off without the surgery.
I do, however, think you owe an apology to the people that you just called "psychos" and "disgusting" earlier in this thread simply because you apparently didn't get the kind of responses you wanted on the other thread. People can see the two posts of your that the moderators deleted on that thread if they look at your latest posts... and, if they do, they will see that you were the one whose posts were objectionable. Everyone there just tried to tell you that your information wasn't accurate, and most of us supported you in your feeling that surgery was probably not right for you at this time because of your anxiety.
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
Did you not get the message the first time around when the moderators deleted not just ONE but TWO of your posts for your personal attacks on the people in the RNY forum who were simply trying to help you by telling you that the information you were putting forth -- and you NEVER did identify where you read that the life expectancy after RNY is only 10-15 years, BTW -- isn't supported by any clinical data, but that because you were so very anxious about the long term effects of the surgery, you probably shouldn't have it?
No one there was mean to you or gave you any reason to call them names in that thread or to call them "psychos" or "disgusting" in this one! I sincerely hope you do well on your own and don't need to have surgery (the odds are against it, but it is by no means impossible), but your post is highly offensive to people who simply tried to help.
Lora
14 years out; 190 pounds lost, 165 pound loss maintained
You don't drown by falling in the water. You drown by staying there.
I know many don't exhaust and stick with it that's where the 2-5% of morbidly obese people are successful. The other 95-98% fail at it. There are various reasons some being metabolic in nature and no matter how much one diets there's a point the body will not cooperate with continued weigh loss then comes the frustration and feeling of failure one more time. Giving up again.
I think you are doing the best for yourself right now. It seems you haven't exhausted all chances of losing, I believe everyone has to give it the final hoorah before considering surgery. You haven't hit the point where diets just will not get you to a healthy weight.
Of course people can gain after WLS you have a period of time where the surgery will work no matter what you eat because of such a small capacity and malabsorption (RNY and DS,DS continues to malabsorb). If someone doesn't optimize the 12-24 months to learn early eating and getting the weight off there's a good chance they'll regain. However if they truly want to lose and maintain it's doable, If they get off track and work the rules again they can lose regain. I've seen it happen with others so I know it's possible.
Proximal RNY Lap - 02/21/05
9 years committed ~ 100% EWL and Maintaining
www.dazzlinglashesandbeyond.com
on 11/27/13 11:10 pm
No offense to morbidly obese people, because I'm one of them. I tried every diet in the book, it was never the diets that failed. It was me that failed. The majority of those people who gain after weight loss surgery, don't regain because th surgery failed, they regain because they go back to eating poorly, overheating, emotional eating. There is a large majority that gain back weight. My cousin included. I don't believe the majority of weight loss people have truly exhausted every effort, I believe they have tried dieting over and over but never truly stuck to it. I mean stuck through it and not gave up after months saying screw it I'm eating how I used to. If I have the surgery I want to truly know in my heart that I have exercised and eaten well for over a year with no results. Medically speaking, if you eat less & exercise more there is hardly a percentage of people that aren't going to lose. The surgery is just a tool, eventually it can fail just like everyone else. Before I cut up my perfectly wonderful stomach and intestines, I want to know in my own heart that I truly did everything I could have. There are many else patients that say that and lie. I know the guy I went through training with for else, asked if there was a McDonald's nearby during lunch "for the coffee" they have the best coffee. I believe that wls is a blessing for some, but if I can not dump, worry about any long term issues & improve myself through diet and exercise, I know that exceed what is done health wise over surgery, I am glad you are well with your surgery though, It gives me hope in case if I choose to do it. Happy thanksgiving!
Good luck trying on your own. That's not a bad idea if you haven't exhausted every chance to lose AND keep it off. Statically 2-5% of morbidly obese people lose over 100 lbs and keep it off, hopefully you will fall in that small percentage.
I tried many diets with no long-term success. I researched WLS for 6 years and didn't do it because I wasn't emotionally ready. You are young if this doesn't work for you (and I hope it does) you still have the option of WLS.
Being almost 9 years post-op and complication free I'd do it again in a heart beat. I'm almost 50 years old....I don't know how many years I have left everyone dies eventually but I do know I'll continue to enjoy the years afforded me with the excess weight gone and no comorbidities thanks to WLS.
Proximal RNY Lap - 02/21/05
9 years committed ~ 100% EWL and Maintaining
www.dazzlinglashesandbeyond.com
