OMG - at first I was horrified by this post - I am so humiliated that I allowed myself to get so large. I have blocked out my highest weights from my memory and along with that some of my most embarrassing moments. There is tremendous pain and it's good to release some of it in this wonderful and safe company.

As I read everyone's post - I saw myself in them, It's healthy to laugh about those things. After all everyone has embarrassing moments as part of being human. Anyone here walk out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to their shoe? How about their skirt tucked into their pantyhose?

I have also been stuck in a booth and needed DH to help me out. It didn't help that my knees were crippled with arthritis at the time and my myositis (inflammation of the muscles) was bad so I could hardly stand - so getting stuck was icing on the cake. The worst thing about it was the table dug into my stomach and hurt the whole meal and the food was dreadful.

Michelle, I have a similar story to yours - only a little worse. My first daughter had to be put in isolation in the NICU for 24 hours after her birth so I had to walk there to see her. While I was looking in the window, one of the delivery RN's asked me when I was going to deliver my baby. Yes, this was someone who works there and delivers babies thought I was still pregnant the day after I gave birth. She did feel bad about her mistake, but it didn't stop me from hurting.

DH and I were among a small group of scientists invited to South Korea to attend a conference give presentations. They also sent us on some wonderful sightseeing tours. DH and I knew this group - we all work in the same field and most of them we had met in person before and continue to meet. The sightseeing tours were held in minivan type vehicles - except these were really high up off the ground like a truck - and I'm height challenged. In the states here they have either a running board or carry a step stool to help you step up into the van - but not in Korea. I couldn't get into these vans and had to be pushed up into them - awful - two men pushing me up and then I had to crawl in and then stand up to sit in a seat. DH and I were both obese and we were squishing everyone else in the seats because there was no extra room. The happiest day was when DH figured out he could lift up the arm lift at the edge of the seat and leave part of his butt off the chair thereby making more room for the three of us on the seat. And everyone else was physically fit too and younger - when we went to the DMZ (demilitarized zone) they took us to this very deep and steep entrance down into a cave where the South Koreans had dug and almost penetrated through an underground tunnel - they had planned to attack SK by surprise. Anyhow DH and I were huffing and puffing and realized that we could never get down, see the tunnel and get back in time - so we only went down a small distance, let the rest go ahead and then we started to go back up. By the time we got back up - huffing and puffing, the other members of our group had been all the way down, been through the tunnel section and had hiked all the way back up. We were so embarrassed. I regret that I hadn't lost my weight and gotten in better shape before this trip of a lifetime. thankfully the good memories out weight the bad and DH and I can laugh about this stuff now.

Molly, it's so good to see how well you're doing now.

I'm going to hang my head in shame here - I said last week I would get my Wi fit up and going and it's still collecting dust. May this is the week I'll get my act together? Maybe tomorrow?

I want to shed the rest of my weight this month - I'm sick of tire of my hanging skin and I'm starting to dream about reconstructive surgery - LOL. However I have to face the reality that my weight loss is slowing down and, well I seem to be losing 1 pound a week now. It's going to be very slow losing these last 25 pounds. I'm frustrated but it's reality.

BTW with WW and TOPS etc. the plans are good - but it all depends on the leaders of the group and the group dynamics - sometimes it's a great fit and sometimes you're just the square peg that doesn't fit into the round hole. I hope your group is a good match for your needs and yes there is something about weighing in these kinds of situations to help keep you honest.

Great post Mary - and I'm shocked because I thought everyone did this. Semantics aside, it really doesn't matter what you call it - treat, cheat etc. the real problem is what comes next - fall off the wagon or stay on the wagon. That's where I always went wrong - I can't just have a little of certain foods, If I have one cookie, I then have to eat a bag or two of cookies - one just doesn't satisfy and the drive to eat more is overwhelming and lasts for many days. Whether I had a bag or one, I would fall off the wagon because I felt miserable; even if I was doing well and those calories were well within the limits of the plan. If I planned ahead that I was going to have a treat, my whole day would be ruined thinking, dreaming and finally eating that stupid treat. I have a long list of treat foods that are so powerfully addicting that they just swallow me up - I lose all control. I keep seeing people writing that they had a single piece of chocolate - I just can't do it, I wish I could but I can't. This stuff is like cocaine to me and there is no joy in it for me - just pain. Yet I do see that it works for many people - I just need another way to deal with this stuff.

I have a few feast days during the year when I can eat this stuff - these days are about celebrations and family etc. so the focus is not only on the treat but non-food activities too, and we're working to add more non-food traditions to them. I still have to be careful about those treat foods - I have to chose among the ones that have less addicting pull over me. It's okay though, I used to love peanuts and now I'm allergic so I feel about peanuts like I do those foods that I'm so addicted to - I remember what they taste like and how they made me feel, but a mature realization that these are not foods for me anymore. It's okay, I have so many other foods to chose from so it's not like I have nothing.

I normally follow Dr. McDougall's Maximum Weight Loss diet but on those days when I feel I need a little more, then I bump up to his regular plan. This allows me a safe way to treat but these aren't foods that drag me out of control. These are still foods that are healthy, just more calorie dense so I feel 100% good about eating them and I don't worry how they will affect my weight loss. I know they will stop or slow my weight loss but I'm not guilty about it, rather I've planned for it and it's okay. Sometimes you need something crunchy or salty or sweet - so I make popcorn without oil or toast pitas and add spices to them or dip in salsa etc.

And sometimes that feeling that you need a "treat" is really masking some emotions that you need to feel and express etc. Psychotherapy helped with this enormously.

Oh Sherrie, you scared me there for a minute, I'm so happy to hear you are doing so much better.  And you're Mama and brother, too!

Boy, you weren't kidding, that was one helluva visit you had from the Whoosh Fairy!  Doesn't it feel so much better to be refined carb detoxed and alla tha****er gone from your system.  You're supposed to be swimming in it, not it swimming in you!  Hehehe.

Hey Girl, I know that some people are allowed to figure in for an extra treat occassionally and Johnita has done well using this system, I do think that for me exercise would have to be figured into the equation at some point to make up the difference or I'd be gaining. 

So Holly, does the plan that you are using allow for a cheat day or cheat meal?  If so, exactly how far off plan are you allowed to go and if you don't mind me asking, how much weight have you lost using this philosophy?

Mary