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I am doing a lot of work on my thinking right now, I will be 32 years old this fall and I realized that I have carried this "fat girl" image for a Loooooong time, so much internal dialog and memories to go over, deal with and release. Setting the stage, and building the proper foundation for new and positive experience and mental outlook are not always easy, especially if you have believed something about yourself for a long time. My brain has not fully caught up to where I am at now physically speaking. I will see a picture of myself and think, thats not me, I still expect to cringe when I see a photo of myself, and I dont do that any longer. I also am breaking the mold of limitations I have put on myself, like the being able to run thing. I actually ran (not fast) for 7 whole minutes this morning on the treadmill! that was something I could not do for a long time, ever really! This is new territory, it's unfamiliar, and it will take time to explore it all and form those new healthy thoughts and get them grounded, But I thank God for where I am now and what he has brought me from, little by little all that toxic "fat thinking" will melt away, just like the pounds!
Michelle Hendrickson Holistic Health Coach http://www.gracioushealth.net
on 6/8/10 11:49 pm
You would think that along with the physical changes, that there would be mental changes too - and there have been. But every once and a while I realize that something I was thinking was "fat thinking" left over from when I was super morbidly obese and it shocks me when it happens.
For example, when we went to the Arts festival we had to drive around to find parking. There wasn't much available on the streets and we ended up parking in a $10. DH is superb at finding fabulous parking spots but it just wasn't his day - the whole time I was thinking how I wanted to park close to the entrance and it didn't matter what it costs because I didn't want to wear myself out just walking to the festival. What I forgot is that it doesn't matter anymore where we park, I can walk for miles and miles without getting tired and in fact extra walking is good exercise. I wonder when my brain will catch up with the new reality of me.
The trouble with "fat thinking" is that it acts to help keep you fat - things like trying to limit how much you have to move or walk while doing simple every day stuff like walking into work, shopping for groceries etc. all add up to less calories burned, less muscle and bone being built etc. It's defeating us before we even start.
Do you have "fat thinking" - how can we change to "healthy thinking".
on 6/8/10 12:09 pm
This weekend I went to an Arts festival and I was remembering that last year I went with DH and DD#2. I remembered last year I had shed enough weight and had gained enough strength to actually walk through the whole festival which must have meant 3 miles - although I did have to sit twice. I do remember I was on a diet because I didn't eat any of that incredible food - you know, deep fried candy bars etc. and I passed up my favorite which is funnel cake. There was a vague memory of feeling good about the whole thing except that I was too large to fit into any of the clothes that they sell - things like hand loomed wool sweaters and hand quilted jackets etc. I don't wear that kind of clothes - but just the thought that if I should see anything that was so special that I wanted to buy made me sad to think that I was too fat for it.
Well this weekend we went back to this arts festival and I was thrilled - I could fit into all those hand made artistic clothes now so that's another limitation removed, not too important since this kind of stuff isn't my style but it was satisfying to see the difference. So then I was wondering what did I weight last year when I went. I didn't always keep records of my weight and only started partway through the process. In fact I don't know my actually highest weight - I've completely blanked that out of my mind permanently because it was so painful to hear. And I didn't know when I had started to keep records.
Well I went to my excel sheet where I keep my records and guess what - that was the day I started my weight records - and the next day was exactly one year to when I last was at the festival and I could see that from that date I have lost 100 pounds. And for a bonus I had written about how I felt last year going to the festival. I wrote that I was thrilled to see that I was able to walk as far and as fast as DH and DD#2. I cried, it was so wonderful to see this - and for many reasons. This is primarily for my daily weight I also use it as a diary. I have found it so helpful to review it from time to time. I've seen how my weight goes a little up and down on a regular basis so I don't worry if I'm up a pound or two because I know it will go back down again. I've also seen the effects of sodium and of course eating too many calories, going on vacation etc. It has also been a source of comfort when the weight is coming off slowly to go back and see other times when it came off slowly too but it still added up over time to a great loss.
I know not everyone is going to record their weights for many reasons, but if you're not certain I highly recommend it.
Do you keep records? Do you find them useful?
on 6/7/10 9:08 am - Phoenix, AZ
Sandi
I'm a whole new Mii! From 273+lbs to 145lbs. and a whole new life!!!
Lost through diet and exercise 
( Praise God and thanks Wii Fit! )
Body by God and Dr. Mazaheri!!!!
1st PS 3/30/10 - LBL/Brachio done by the wonderful Dr. Mazaheri
2nd PS 6/1/10 - BL/Thoracoplasty/Full TL of course with Dr. Mazaheri
Thank you God! I will always be grateful for the change you have made in me! All glory is Yours!
I am counting the days until I can go see him. As of now we are planning on leaving June 20th to make the trip down to see him. I know my problem will be i will not want to come back home. I will want to stay with the little precious one.
My weight was actually really good today it had been hanging more around the 147.8 to 148 range but today I was back down to 146.6 so I was very happy about that.
Johnita
Non Surgery - (HW/CW/GW) - - 247/173/150(first major goal)
on 6/5/10 11:08 pm - Rochester, NY
Congratulations on your loss and maintenance....cheers for you! Lots of things to cheer for in your life....enjoy your daughter's graduation too!!
Love to see the big losers (winners) come back and let us know how maintenance is going....inspiring for all!!
on 6/5/10 10:59 pm - Rochester, NY
Can't wait to hear all about it. The world is now your oyster.
on 6/5/10 10:27 am
on 6/5/10 10:24 am
First congratulations on getting below your goal and maintaining - I think maintaining is harder and it's good to see you have a plan to deal with it.
Second congratulations of your daughter's graduation - LOL no matter what you do, they still grow up and become adults.
Third congratulations on your new nephew - sounds like he's getting excellent care even if it is a little scary. Hope he does well and gets to go home soon. I can see why you want to get down quickly to visit the new baby. Nothing like cuddling and kissing a baby - that wonderful baby smell.
