What have you done differently this time?

Hi All, Thank you very much for the very kind welcome that you have given me as a new member of this forum. I think that the support that I find here will be invaluable to me and it was so nice to see all the reply posts when I introduced myself. So, I cant help but notice the great results that many of you have had. Like many of you, I have gained and lost weight so many times -- and for the last two years I have hovered around 300 lbs. What are you doing differently this time that is bringing such great results? What is your secret? Nancy 300/295/150

I really don't know. When I joined Weigh****chers in Oct. of 2002, I only did it because my daughter wouldn't go by herself and I knew it was really important to her. I was happy and wasn't overly worried about my health. Yeah, I was diagnosed with diabetes, but I didn't have to take medicine, I was walking 2 miles a day even at 345 lbs. My blood pressure was fine, cholesterol is good shape. 50 years old, knees shot but what the heck. My husband was fine with me so... We started out just kind of a little competition although very, very supportive. She lost faster than I did. I of course was very proud of her. As time went on we were having fun trying new recipes and finding new low point foods at the stores. Sharing and caring. Then we started seeing some results. Pants not quite so tight, then starting to bag, fitting into smaller sizes, etc. The amount of pounds started adding up and it got to the point where it would be a real shame to give up then. I went through a struggle when my daughter became pregnant and couldn't go to the meetings anymore (WW rules). So, I talked my sister into joining and she talked my mom into joining. I knew I needed a buddy along for the ride and I didn't want to go back. Looking back I realize that that was a big turning point for me. I could have so easily stopped along with my daughter but I was on a roll, man! I made it work for me. My sister lost 65 lbs and my mom lost 35. After the baby was born, my daughter came back and she got to goal 1 week before I did having lost a total of 110 pounds. One week (Sept of 2004) later I hit goal having lost 142 pounds at WW. (I had lost and kept off 40 pounds a couple of years earlier). We celebrated by spending the day at a spa having massages and manicures and mud wraps and stuff! Things are so much better for me now. I love to go shopping. I get to choose what I like not what fits. My knees are better. Not perfect. I'm 52 now after all. I was fat all my life except for the one other time I lost a little over 100 pounds when I was 24, just long enough to get pregnant with my twins. This time is different. I have made a lot of changes. I love going to the gym. 5 days a week for me. 4AM I get up so that I can get it in. I work two jobs, one of them is full time. My husband is just as happy with me now as he was before but he is very proud of me and knows how much happier I am. I had a tummy tuck in Nov of 2005 and now I look better than when I was 13! The two years it took for me to lose the 142 pounds on Weigh****chers was a true blessing because my changes became habits and now I have a great deal of confidence tempered by the knowledge that it can come back on and I have to be vigilant and there is not a finish line. I'll never be done!!! Hallelujah! I have the knowledge, the tools and the determination. I didn't get it overnight. It isn't a secret, no magic pill, no quick answer. I did it and I know you can too. Sometimes it is one meal at a time and sometimes it is one instant at a time. I'm thinking more and more of food as fuel instead of my friend, confidant, drug of choice, or answer to so many different emotions. Find some hobbies to do with your hands. I carve wood (whittle) hard to eat when you are surrounded by wood chips, I also knit and I don't eat while I read my books now. Thanks for letting me go on and on. Let us know how you are doing. Great decision! Good luck to you. Mary

Mary, I really appreciate your long response. I hope that I can be as successful as you have. I too have been having a few problems with my knees and I would like to lose the weight before it becomes a major problem. I am 48 years old and would like to be fabulous at 50! I need to lose almost exactly the same amount of weight as you have lost and I wonder if Weigh****chers would help me. I am currently in Canada although I am an American - but I am sure that I could find a meeting. I think you are right in that we come to turning points - and then we can allow ourselves to fall off the program, or we can stick with it. I have often chosen the first alternative, but long term success lies with selecting the second and "staying the course". I also purchased some needlepoint this week based on your suggestion of keeping my hands busy and I find I am really enjoying it again. Nancy

My secret?? Perseverance. Self-Control. That's it. No matter HOW you go about losing weight (Atikins Diet, South Beach, *insert random fad here* diet, or WLS) it ALL comes down to the same basic principle -- Self Discipline. The way I found my own self-control was by thinking about the long term affects each specific food has on my body. I learned about how certain foods treat your internal organs... and when I even looked at food that was "bad" i thought about what it was DOING TO ME once I swallowed it... and it made me sick to my stomache! I got to the point where whenever I look at something bad, I feel queesy, so the temptation is gone completely. I learned to Eat to LIVE. Not eat for pleasure. I eat to LIVE. I don't care if it tastes good or not... I eat what I NEED to in order to survive. And that's it. Once you find what works for you... what your little motivators are. Once you're there, it all gets easier. It's all mind over matter really. Grab 'hold of the reins and take control of your life!! CJ 250/171/140 nonop

Wow CJ, you have done really well. I tried to incorporate some of what you said into my routine this week. I purchased more items fresh, meaning some fruits and veggies and I was very leary of foods with lots of fat and preservatives. It did change my thinking and I really appreciate the suggestions. I am sure that I have put lots of things into my body that have damaged it and I worry sometimes about my heart. But I am trying to do better job. I need to be a much more "eat to live" person. Eating has been much of my entertainment in the past. Thanks a million. Nancy

Hi Nancy, Well, i can't speak for anyone other than me, but this is the most weight I've ever taken off at once (and i'm not done yet). I was trim in my 20s and 30s, and then the weight started to jump on, and i ended up 115 pounds heavier than my old WW maintenance weight. And i couldn't take it off. For about five years I kept losing and gaining, gaining, and losing. And never more than about 30 pounds. So why is it working now? How? Well, for the first time I faced that this was a physical and mental and emotional problem. I listened to my doctors. I faced some of my demons. I accepted that I could not do this by myself. I took the medications (yes, plural) my doctor recommended, I kept to it, and lo and behold, i wasn't miserable and ravenous, and, for the first time in years, it was not difficult to lose. So maybe there's a trend developing in these answers. It's that what works is extremely personal. You must give it your best shot, and keep trying, keep researching, keep making changes, until something "fits" you. At least that's what i had to do. liz (who's wearing a size 14 skirt she hasn't worn in 7 years today!) 258/202/196(minigoal)/?

Liz, I dream of being in my size 14 skirts. I was so impressed when I read this in your email. I think that you are right that I have to find out what will fit my lifestyle and then keep adjusting and changing as I find things that I can do better. One thing that seems to be consistent between the answers is that people are consistent and just dont give up! I also have to face the fact that I am an emotional eater and that I eat to entertain myself, when I am sad or worried - or even happy. Plus, most of our leisure activities revolve around food. I am not on the medications this time around but you did remind me that they are there if I need them. I am wishing for my size 14 skirts. Good for you! Nancy

Hi Nancy, Welcome to the non-op board. If you read my profile at the beginning I am continually asking, "why is this working?" That was a common thought for me during the first few months of my program. After I realized it wasn't a fluke, I just went with it. I had never truly been on a real program before, for any amount of time. There were sporadic "I am on a diet" moments, but for the most part I was just living life as a 350 pound woman, much like Mary said. I had lost over 100 pounds back in 1997 merely by walking 3 miles a day and not eating a lot of sugar or bread items. I didn't label it anything at the time, I just did it. I went from wearing tent clothing to a size 24, but never got smaller than that. So I can't begin to imagine how big I was before I lost. Never even weighed myself because I didn't own a scale. I know I got down to about 290 pounds, only because I visited my ob/gyn around that point. It is often said that someone has to hit their bottom before realizing that things have to change. I think I hit the bottom when I had knee surgery, right leg in March of 2005 and left leg in April of 2005. I cannot begin to tell you how difficult the recovery process was for a super morbidly obese person. I could not walk, just could not walk. I was literally a cripple. I would cry after every time I went to the grocery store because the pain was debilitating. I was miserable, even through 3 times a week physical therapy. I realized then that I would do anything, anything at all, to stop the pain. I vowed that if it were in my power to control the amount of pain I had, then I was going to do it. And I did. The weight was going to kill me if I didn't get control over it, starting with my knees and moving on to god knows where. So on July 7, 2005 I regained control over my life. I have a freakishly amazing amount of self-control. I can honestly say that in the past almost 8 months, I have not "cheated" once. Cheating means different things to different people. To me it means I have not eaten anything processed with sugar, or made with white flour. It also means that I have controlled my portions so dramatically that I get full on literally 1/4 of the food I used to eat. I think it is CJ that says to make your body think you've had WLS. That may sound weird but let me tell you, it works. I wish you a lot of luck and again, welcome to the non-op board. Donna

Donna, Your response was very interesting to me because I have been having trouble with my knees the last year or so and I am sure that the weight has a lot to do with that. I am scared to death that I will have serious problems if I dont do something and your story of your recovery from knee surgery only reaffirms that. That alone should be a motivator shouldnt it? I did read your profile and I smiled when I saw your surprise and mild disbelief when you continued to lose. It really impressed me and I thought about your comment "make your body think you've had WLS" at least 100 times this week. I found that I could reduce my portion size and still be satisfied. That was shocking. Maybe I can get the results of WLS and not have the risks and complications that go with it. It seems to be working so far. Great thoughts and thanks so much, Nancy 300/290/150 non-op

Hi Nancy, For me it was definately a mind thing. I decided to not let other people stress me out (mainly ex husband) and to take care of myself. I had to get it through my head that it was ok to take care of me. It takes a lot of focus and time for me to maintain my weight -- I'm just the high maintenance kind. I guess I had to develop some self-esteem. I'm not doing a good job trying to explain, but it's difficult to put into words what goes on inside the head. Lynette