Diets DO NOT work

hi there folks, I am posting this here today because to post it on the main board is only going to get me flamed. I have been reading the posts on the main board, as many of us have, and I just see something recurring that drives me batty. There are so many people out there saying that diets do not work, and that the only way to long-term weight loss for the morbidly obese is through WLS. Well, they are right to a degree. Diets do not work. What works is a long term committment to a change of life, period. I see so many people talking about the millions of diets they have been on that have failed them. Failed THEM. I think people really need to discard their delusions and really be honest with themselves. I have been a proponent of being honest, realizing my shortcomings and learning to deal with them. I was thinking the other night about how many diets I had been on. Does it count if you only stayed on the diet a week??? Nope. Does it count if you didn't even make it through the DAY??? Nope. To me for a diet to fail would mean that you did EVERYTHING that you had to do and you lost no weight or did not get one bit healthier. For a small portion of the population with some undiagnosed medical ailment, perhaps this is true. But I would venture a guess that this isn't true for most people. When being honest with myself I realized that I had never truly committed to a plan to lose weight. Never. Once I lost over 100 pounds because I quit eating sugar and walked 3 miles a day. My body had reached over 400 pounds and I wasn't sure it could handle much more. I did it because it was the right thing to do at the time. That was back in 1997 and when I started my new plan in 2005 I had managed to only, and I say only with a great deal of pride, managed to gain back about 50 of that. I am really tired of reading that WLS is the only way to maintain a weight loss. WLS takes a great deal of committment because it IS a lifestyle change. Why does it elude those who had WLS to believe that the lifestyle change can be achieved WITHOUT WLS? Let's all look at all of the incredibly strong people here like Kasey, Lynette Phyllis and Mary who have managed to make it to their goal and keep it off. Let's look at those of us who have managed to lose anywhere from 10-100+ pounds and still come every single day to gain support and continue to work our programs. Look at all of us who go to the gym or outside or in our own homes and commit to exercise, in any form??? It's all about lifestyle change. I am so sick and tired of hearing "only 1% of those who lose weight through "dieting" keep their weight off." You know, perhaps that is correct. Maybe the words need to be changed to "those that undertake a committed lifestyle change regarding eating, exercising and a healthy well being, will one day be successful at maintaining a healthy existence." Thank you all for listening, thankfully I have this place to come to. Have a most wonderful day. Donna

Donna, You took the words right out of my mouth! The other thing I have noticed is the high number of posts from post-ops, 18mos and further out, in a panic because the old habits have "come back" and they are gaining weight. After the "honeymoon" period is over it seems post-ops are in the same boat as non-ops. They have to make life-style changes to keep the weight off, the same as the rest of us, and many of them seem "surprised" that they are back to "dieting & exercise" to maintain their loss. The other thing that makes me crazy is how many of them attribute all the body changes to "WLS" & "this surgery" when the majority of what they are talking about is due to weight loss. They are the same body changes we are experiencing and have little to do with whether or not you had WLS. they are body changes that are common to just about anyone who loses a significant amount of weight, regardless of method. Now that I am done whining, I have to say that I have met a number of supportive, open-minded, caring people on the main board who have been very "welcoming" to me in spite of my non-op status. Thanks for letting me vent. Maren

I'm glad this is posted here. Dieting, itself, is difficult and has a very high "failure" rate. However, you are right..........a personal committment to change your life is NOT a diet. The thing that bothers me the most on the main board is the defensiveness of WLS persons. Now, my sister, my neice, several friends are WLS persons and have varying degrees of results. So, I have seen that work too.....to varying degrees. But the non-acceptance of ANY other weight loss program, the "I can't wait to see when her weight all comes back" statements, and the defensiveness bothers me! Dieting is hard...........the road to and/wls itself is hard..........LIFE is hard...................but personal choice should be applauded....supported....and encouraged! Yippee to those who consider themselves a success in WHICHEVER choice they make! YAYYYYYYY for ALL of us who take ONE baby-step to change our lives! Yayyyyyyyyyyyy to ME cuz I'm drinking a SlimFast Optima this morning instead of going out to a big country breakfast with my friends! Have a great day you guys! Kandy

Kandy, Well said! While some seem to be fine with "us" others are just plain rude, defensive and some simply ignore any post from a non-op. I believe the ones who are most defensive are so because if we succeed without surgery they feel that somehow makes them a failure (which is not the case at all) and I believe that a number of post-ops (although they would never admit it) do, in their deepest hearts, feel like they took the "easy way out". Again, I do not think that is the case, but sometimes I think they "do protest too much". Just my not-so-humble opinion. Blessings, Maren

I have been on many diets, too. On a few of them, I actually got to goal weight, but didn't know what to do to maintain it. I have an eating disorder - Binge Eating Disorder. I also have Compulsive Over Eating. I have issues behind both of them. I started back to OA again to deal with these issues. I also need their system to help me stay away from sneaking food and cheating on my food plan. You're right about one thing - stick to the diet like recommended, and you will lose weight and reach goal weight. Sticking to it is the hard part for me now. I used to be able to do that when I was much younger, but have alot of trouble now. I call this "diet burnout", and it has to do with the childhood issues behind my overeating. Denise Phares

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh Donna today is my birthday and you just gave me the best present !!!!!!!!!!! Love you sweetie !!!!!!!!! I could not agree more with you ladies. And yes, you would be surprise, yes my support is wonderful. However, there is that small few that I know is just waiting for me to blow back up !!!!!!!!! As I have stated before, Phyll is fighting back this time........ So far, I am okay and maintaining......... It is a lifestyle change, for the non-op and wls post-op. We are all fighting the same disease. Let's continue to support one another and we will beat this thing....... Phyllis

I think of WLS as just a "jump start" to weight loss and a life style change. The folks who are successful with WLS are those that change how they eat and add exercise to their lives. There are a lot of people out there who had WLS 10 or 15 years ago and have gained back every pound. I know some of them personally. And, not only have they gained back the weight, but they now have other health issues to deal with that have everything to do with the WLS. The surgery has changed in the last 10 years, so we'll have to see what the next 10 or 15 years bring to those having the surgery today. I don't think the surgery is a magic fix to being fat in the long term, maybe only in the short term. The benefit of it, I think, is that "jump start" - it gets you going in the right direction those first few months when you literally can't eat too much. It seems to me that it helps deal with the "head" issues of overeating. That is what I struggle with every day. The secret, I guess, is to "act as if" I'd had the surgery. Some day, easier said than done. Those of you on list who have been sucessful with no only loosing the weight, but keeping it off, are truly an inspiration. I wish I had your stories on video to watch while I trudge away on the treadmill every day! Karen

Donna, first thanks for the kind words. You are one of my inspirations. You've done so well! I'm also glad you posted this. Being honest with oneself is vital, as you point out, and it's something that most people cannot do. And you're right, it's diet AND exercise AND lifestyle changes. My biggest gripe on the main board is post-ops *****fuse to exercise and then whine when they stop losing. I had responded to another post on the main board, and got flamed by a pre-op who misread what I had written, and wrote: "You can deny yourself the chocolate raisnettes once twice three times but one day- you will plow into them and it will end up being a huge binge ..." Now, if anyone wrote that to a post-op, their computer would melt from the flames. But no one came to my defense. I guess it's OK to say that a nonop will go back to her old habits. I often feel like a red-headed stepchild on the main board. I sometimes get backhanded compliments, but this was the first time I encountered open hostility. But everyone on this board is so awesome and supportive! Best of luck. Kasey 365/210 (nonop)

Donna, You are right on the money! Have a wonderful evening

Hi Donna, What really surprises me is that sometimes people that have weight problems themselves are less supportive to others than some skinny people. Some people are very narrow minded. I am glad that I didn't have to have WLS. I am happy for those who have had it and are successful with it. WLS is big money. I think some of the medical professionals are feeding into people's minds that the only way for someone with a lot of weight to loose is through WLS. I think the "old fashioned" way is going to be back in the spotlight. TV (Biggest Loser, FitTV,etc.) and magazines are promoting healthy eating and exercise. Lynette