Starting a new job at 400 lbs

I really don't feel like starting it, but it's a great opportunity.
People, please give me encouragement that it'll be ok. I know they hired me, but still, I hate meeting new people and starting something exciting like a new job being at this weight, and barely able to function physically and mentally because of the weight. I feel like I'm 1/3 of the great person I know I could be.
I feel like I want to run away...run away from everything. I take care of my elderly mother who is really hard to get along with and she's made my life miserable living with me,  and I wish I could just run and leave it all behind and find peace, peace long enough to start a new life and lose this weight.

UGH sorry I'm being so dark, but I'm very sad about my life right now. I feel like I'm in a hole and can't see the light at the top to even give some hope things will change. I've started 100 diets only to end them after three or four days. I don't see or feel any hope.

:((((

Let's focus on one thing at a time.......... CONGRATS on a new job!  How cool and could be so much fun.
Meeting new people can be exciting...you never know you might meet a new best friend or at least a really good friend who will support you with other challenges you are facing.

How about you tie in weight loss with your new job......you could make this a starting point for a whole new life for you.  Make a couple of small changes.....pack a healthy lunch, commit to yourself to not drink soda or not go to the candy machine at the office....just a few simple changes to start can equal a couple of lbs lost quickly.

Go into the job with a good, positive attitude and the people around you will react in kind.
Best wishes on your job, weight loss and your mom.....

I hope you can allow yourself to feel really good at landing a new job that is such a great opportunity - savor this moment. It will help your self esteem. Especially at this time when people are struggling to find work - kudos.

Ruth is right -  focus on the positive - opportunity to make new start with new friends. Keep your energy up and dress professionally so these new people will see you in your best light. Many people, even thin ones have trouble meeting new people and starting new jobs - it is stressful, but in a few days you'll be more comfortable.

And yes, tie in making healthy changes, start new routines - healthy lunches, find some friends to walk with during during lunch, take fruit for a snack.

Consider all the pluses with this change, instead of the negatives. I also have started 100 diets, but if I didn't start the one I'm one now I wouldn't have had this success. And if these negative feelings continue, definitely seek professional help - a good therapist can really help you in all aspects of your life.

Good luck and come back and update up on how it's going.

I want to thank both of you for your responses. I want to start a new diet program as well, and see what happens. Hopefully being in a new environment with new people will help motivate me to stick on a diet. Im thinking of joining Weigh****chers, as this program is one I've never tried and the weekly meetings could be another incentive.

Again thanks for the encouraging words.

Congrats on the new job. Look at it this way that is one area of your life that is going right. You had the skills that got you the job and that says a great deal about you. You are much more than your weight.

I understand about caring for your Mom. I took care of my mother in law 24/7 for years and still am the one left to check on her now that she is in a nursing home. My MIL has Alzheimer's so getting away required having a sitter but whatever you have to do make time for yourself . I'm 33 and this past year I have just learned how to have boundaries with my family and it has helped so much. It is a wonderful thing to help our parents and kids but we can't forget about ourselves or who will be there to care for them ?
Congrats again on the job I hope you love it.

Hello Pretty in Pink,

Congragulations on your new job!! At 400 lbs you must have done something right to land your job and are a very smart person to have the couarge to go out and land a new job.  Keep up the good work!!  And think positive thoughts. I know this is easier said than done but it takes effort.  Never give up on yourself.  If you don't believe in yourself no one else will.  I beilieve if you have to courage to land a job, you have what it takes to take control of your life and lose weight.  Take it one day at a time.  You can do it!! 

Good luck
Molly   

Hi there.  I understand exactly how you feel!  I was miserable in my last job, but I didn't go out and look for anything else because I didn't want to interview at my weight!  I got my current job because I know one of the ladies that works here, and I did some work for her boss a few years ago, but I'm not happy here either - but the thought of looking for something else scares me!

The office I am in has 3 women working here, as well as my boss.  These three women are very fashion-conscious, all very slim and trim and take good care of themselves.  I feel like a giant here in the office, and that I don't fit in at all!!

But, I will say there was one positive that come out of it - I am more concerned with my appearance than I otherwise might be.  I realized how much I was "ignoring" myself and just taking care of others.  I was feeding myself food, in lieu of truly taking care of myself.

This realization hasn't translated into any major changes in weight or anything, but it is always in the back of my mind that I deserve better.  I just have to realize that is true!

So, I agree with everyone else - try to look for the positive with the new job!  Go in there and knock their socks off!

Heather.

Revel in the fact you landed the job and use the new job as a catapult into a new lifestyle!! They know nothing about you... you can make yourself whoever you want to be! I'm 300+ pounds but I've long set the standard about myself that I generally eat healthy- so no one brings me 'junk' to eat. They respect my choice.

So set the tone...if they see you as timid, unsure or 1/3 of a person- they'll treat you as such. We torture ourselves in our minds often enough- its best to make it so that others can't monopolize on those thoughts. 

i know how u feel...and the harsh reality is, people DO talk about ur weight after meeting u. i seen it so many times and know it had to have happened to me...someone new comes, everyone greets her and such, then as soon as she walks away u hear, 'wow shes a big girl'...that reality is what got me to start losing.

Wait...........lemme get this right... you snagged a job at 400 lbs!  Is that some serious boost of the ego or WHAT.  At 265 lbs I was getting turned down left and right.... and considering I had 15 years of experience in my field.. a resume that touted better business awards with accolades from customers as well as ceo's... they would take one look at me and not even bother with my resume.  This tells me that there's one whole heyel of a lot to you than weght!! 

Running away doesn't do any good... I've learned personally that the problems, hurt and heartache are all just waiting for me when I get there.

It's time to lean on God.... give it to Him because there's nothing on your plate right now that HE can't handle.

Good luck with your new job and God be with you!!!!

Lori