For Chelsea A.-She Wants to Know, How Do You Handle Stress Eating

Chelsea just asked me this on a previous post I had about stress eating, but it's way down on the board now so I thought it might be nice if I brought it up again and we could all offer her some advice.  Chelsea wrote:

So, I post every once in a while, but this is my biggest obstacle and I am hoping some of you can help me.  I have lost 21 lbs, but I still have a loooong way to go.  I have found my self eating more and more these last couple of days and the scale is going up.  I am currently EXTREMELY stressed out ($$$   and I was wondering what ya'll do to help when you find yourself getting really stressed out and looking in the pantry.  Do you journal? Talk to someone? I just don't know how to handle it..... And you all have apparently battled it out for the better and I need some advice.... please!!! 

Chelsea, for me, the best way to handle stress eating is to first of all be aware of that fact that I'm stressed.  For so long I self medicated with food that I wasn't acknowledging the stress at all.  Stress, emotional eating, boredom, depression, apathy, anger, self loathing, etc. are all emotions, and until we learn to identify them in ourselves, and know exactly how we will react to them, we let them get the best of us and then we eat to suppress the feelings.  I always say that we have to become keenly aware of our emotions at all times and constantly ask ourselves, what is causing me to feel this way?  Once you identify the problem, work on the PROBLEM, then your healthy eating pattern will fall back into line.

Another thing that helped me was to 'learn' discipline.  I wasn't raised with it so saying no to food didn't come easy for me.  I talk about this on my profile in "The Path of Least Resistance."  For me, discipline was stressfull!

Ask if you have more questions, cuz this is a never ending journey and we all have to be here for one another.

Mary

Chelsea,
If I'm stressed and hovering around the kitchen I literally ask myself do I REALLY want this now and pay for it later???  Lately I'm pretty good about drinking a glass of water or a cup of green tea to give me that FULL feeling.  

It is try what the experts say.....the pang only lasts about 10-15 mins...if I fill myself with liquid (non-alcoholic and no calories) it really does help me to walk away from the kitchen.  If I'm REALLY STRESSED (as in rip roaring pissed) I will vacuum or go outside and walk around the block or do something in the yard.  More often than not I do turn to cleaning to distract me especially if I'm angry.  MAN I had some cleaning session last Sunday!  :-)

It is not easy breaking old habits and creating new ones.  It took me a long time to be able to control the urge to eat.
I always say, I'm not "on a diet"....I changed the way I think of food and my relationship with food.  I make the decision when to eat, what to eat and how much.  So when I'm stressed and tempted I make the decision not to consume extra calories....it's all about not letting the emotions rule when and what I eat.

Not sure if that helps at all....hope it does......please post again so we can encourage each other.
TTFN
Ruth

Dear Chelsea:

I'd suggest you start attending meetings of Overeaters Anonymous and get some recovery from your compulsive overeating.  Otherwise, you'll be fighting yourself and not losing weight very well the rest of your life! 

Doing it yourself is fine, if you don't suffer from that disease.  If you do, and it sounds like you do, then you need to have a Higher Power relieve your suffering, and restore you to normal eating.  Please don't struggle any longer and get yourself to a meeting.  I'm in recovery now and I NEVER overeat!

Denise Phares/highpow

I was wondering what your suggestions would be to someone that has alot of pain and can't physically clean (or walk, exercise, ect) the stress away? I am a terrible emotional eater (bordom and depression included) and I just don't have enough weapons in my arsenal to combat it. Last spring, when I weighed less and felt better, I found that I really do enjoy yard work and cleaning as a way to deal with stress. But recently I've been having such pain in my back, knees, legs, (due to my weight, edema, and arthritis) that I've had trouble just getting around the house. I hate being like this, and being unable to move around well just furthers my depression and bordom. so....I need ideas...help?

So this is another 'been there done that'.  When I weighed 320, I had the worst heel spurs that felt like ice picks in my heels when I walked and my cankles were so big I thought my skin would burst.  The first thing I did was go cold turkey on my one liter a day Pepsi habit.  Just cutting down on that amount of sodium and sugar helped because I was so sensitive to it.  Notice, I didn't say that it was easy, I went through pure hell to detox but everytime I wanted Pepsi, you know, just the one that wouldn't hurt?  I reminded myself that I only had this one body and no one was responsible for it but ME.  If I didn't resist it, if I didn't make the change, then nothing would ever change, and I was DESPERATE for things to change.  That's why I made you the Queen of Starting Over, you have to start over to make things change. 

Good news!  Once I lost the first fifty pounds, my heels stopped hurting.  So once you do get around to making the change to better choices, the pain does go away.  Get on that bike and ride girlee!  Even if you have to get in thirty minutes in ten minute increments and it takes all day, just do it.  Take some hot baths or showers when you start to have aches and remember to stretch. 

Don't bring junk food into the house, especially if you are depressed.  It's just too easy to give into it when your give a damn is busted.  YOU MUST GIVE A DAMN!!!  It's the first step into loving yourself enough to take care of you.  

Here's a thought for ya.  If you continue down this path of destructive behavior and something bad happens to you...your daughter is going to be raised by your Mother and Father!!!  I figure after hearing THAT, you won't eat for days!

*mwah*  Mary  

Thanks Mary, I'm gonna try a little bit at a time. I already know from experience that once i start loosing weight, everything gets easier, but it's just getting to that first little loss that I'm having trouble with.

Believe me, I've thought about what would happen to Jordyn if something happened to me....NOT a pretty picture. My mom and dad, there out, I wouldn't put Jordy through the same things I went through. My sister is out, she wants to be an aunt, but NEVER a mom. She's made that clear. My brother's too young, I think he'd try, but he'd have no idea what to do with a little girl. So I can't die anytime soon. I'm gonna have to get with the program.

An idea just occured to me, as I sit here. I'm very good at ignoring the obvious, especially when I'm at home. I can sit in front of my computer and avoid mirrors and people and ignore the fact that I'm 450ish pounds and a size 32W. I fool myself into thinking I'm not THAT big, that one more bite won't matter. I'm going to take front, back and side pictures of myself (in my bathing suit, if I can bring myself to wear it) and tape them in front of my computer. That way, I won't be able to deny that there is a problem. It is right in front of me....

Heather, my love, that is some SERIOUS body dysmorphia you have going on there!  My friend Donna had that, too, it's not that uncommon.

Girlee, you need to take those pics and plaster them anywhere you eat...even in your car because one more bite DOES MATTER!!!  Especially if it's a no good, high calorie, salt laden, swell your cankles, minus nutritional value kinda bite.  Start snappin' Sweetie.

Mary

P.S.  As someone who has been an executor to a few wills, make sure you leave it explicitly in your will who will take Jordan, if not, your parents automatically get her if the Father is not forthcoming.  And don't assume that just because he is not involved in her life now, that it won't change in the case of your demise.  In court, the only opinion a dead person has is what they stated in their will.  Sounds morbid, I know, but there have been times I wanted to revive the dead and smack them around for not legally stating the obvious!

You can go to www.oa.org and see about going on-line there.  That would be good for somebody who can't physically walk.  I realize OA is not for everyone, because some people get put off by the spiritual part of the program.  For me, it's the only thing that's worked, and I feel so good and only eat when I'm hungry, not to cover up my emotions, any more.  That's a major miracle for me!

Good luck to you, whatever path you choose.  I don't mean to be pushy about OA.  I just love recovery so much (no compulsive overeating).

Denise Phares/highpow

Hi Heather,
Can you start with a 5 min walk?  At first all I could do was 10 mins at a time.  My knees hurt my legs hurt and I was out of breath but eventuallly I was able to work it up to a longer walk.  If you can manage 10 mins 3 or 3 times during the day it would make a big difference for you.

Do you have access to a pool?  You can swim or hold onto the side and kick your legs.....it becomes good cardio exercise too.

When you go shopping are you able to walk around the store?