weight loss goals - a great dichotomy....

(deactivated member)
on 5/29/09 7:04 am
Sorry if this is a little long and rambling in nature.

I'm certain that all of us want to get down to a point where we are slim and well within our normal weight range and look good - not anorexic but healthy weight. I think everyone, when they start a diet sees themselves getting to this kind of goal.

OTOH that may not be a realistic goal for some of us. I'm not really sure where I will end up. I don't want to set a goal that I can't reach, maybe I'll be happy just to drop enough that I'm more active? DH and I have discussed what we are doing and we will definitely continue eating like this for the rest of our live. I do weigh occasionally and I know I'm losing weight both on the scale and in my clothes. OTOH as soon as I get off the scale I have forgotten what my weight was - and I'm not worrying about it or recording it.

So I really don't know where I'm going with this weight wise and my health goals have become more important to me such as getting my BP in the low normal range and dropping cholesterol etc.

Do you have a strong need to have a final goal weight?

Skylar
mwy
on 5/29/09 7:54 am, edited 5/30/09 2:11 am
Do I have a strong need to have a final goal weight?  HELL NO!!!

With my hormones and PCOS, I was proud to be able to lose any weight at all.  My goal was to lose enough to have breast reduction surgery and get my big giant panni whacked.  Whatever size I was after that was good with me. 

I've spent too much time on the Plastic Surgery Board with some of the weight loss surgery people and some of those women are absolutely obsessed with a number on a scale.  They can't enjoy how far they have come because they forever see how far they have to go to a goal that may not be attainable for them. 

I may not be rail thin, but I don't have any fat rolls and I'm a size smoothe, so that just makes me happy as a pig in ****! Pig 

My goal is met, no more excrutiating boob pain and no more big belly.  Now I just have to keep the weight off, which to me is more challenging than losing it!

I think your body will let you know when it has reached it's goal.

Mary





BigCityGirl
on 5/30/09 1:42 am - San Diego, CA
Do I have a strong need to achieve a final goal weight.  Absolutely. 

And here's why:  If you don't set goals that are measurable, you will just thrash about forever, repeating behaviors which have brought you to where you are now.  Being successful at something means being accountable for one's behavior.  With no measuring mechanism how does one account? 

When I weighed 230, I didn't set my goal at 137, I set it at 199.  When I reached that, then I set a new goal of 189, and so on.  When I'm working on a weight goal, the only way I can stay on plan is to account, every day, on a scale what's happening. 

None of this is easy.  Even after a significant weight loss, I still haven't reached my final goal but I sure as heck don't want to regain the weight which took so much effort to lose, and I would sure love to see 139 again on my scale.  It's really hard but so worth it in the end.

As for the health goals, I achieved all mine and I can't tell you how good it feels to be healthy again and off meds.  Most of that was a result of my work at the gym.  BTW, gym memberships in the big clubs are at an all time low - if you're not a member, consider joining a gym now - rates have never been better.  I weighed 230 when I joined the gym and I got a ton of support from the regulars - they were so supportive that I was working on myself.  Don't be afraid to pursue this - it really works.

The best of luck.

Donna
Surgeon: Joseph Grzeskiewicz, M.D., F.A.C.S.
La Jolla Cosmetic Surgery Centre
Neecee O.
on 5/30/09 2:39 am - CA
Hi Skylar

Wow - the two posts above mine are such great representations of the "choices' here when it comes to "goal weight". Good job Donna & Miz Mary! I agree with each of them on several points.

I am more in Mary's camp, for a couple reasons i can list for now:

I am 52, married and my honey thinks i am the hottest thing ever - at 190ish#!!!! he married me heavier than this.

My body has changed - a lot - and the "perfect weight" of 140 (as in high school weight) is unknown on how would look on my frame now. It seems like there would be a ton of hanging skin - and frankly, I am all for a small amount of PS, but I fear I'd have so much skin we're talking a knob on top of my head and pulling the skin so tight I would have a beard of pubic hair!

Lastly (and more importantly), I do not want to do what I would have to do to get to 140, which would be starve PLUS work out 3 hours a day.

I very much see Donna's point which to me really means - don't get too complacent and accept "less than" I can be. There is THAT! I am the first one to know that deep down I must not *really* believe i can get to 140 and just choose the easy way around it - accepting a fatter self.

It is a conundrum.

In the end, I must validate how hard I do work at THIS weight, however - it's not like i am secretly driving thru fast food places and laying about. I am doing a reasonable amount of effort to stay here. Here's what i mean:

I am a wife & mother FIRST in my life.  Yes, i do take time for "me" - but I owe my sacred family:
a good living (9-10 hours a day)  +
time together (2-3 hours a day) +
housework (1 hour) +
sleep (8 hours) +
spiritual/growth time - 1 hour) +
exercising (1.5 hours) +

that'd be 24 hours conservatively.

I feel I must give myself credit for the commitment I do give.

great subject, Skylar!





"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."   ~Mark Twain

mwy
on 5/30/09 1:45 pm
Damn Neecee, if that's how you think plastic surgery is done, I'm happy as hell that you weren't my surgeon!!!

A beard of pubic hair...Good Lawd! Buggin

Mary 





johnita36
on 5/30/09 5:37 am - Hiltons, VA
I do like setting weight loss goals for me they keep me motivated and focused on where I want to be in the end.  However I'm trying to set small goals, My first goal right now is to get to 199 I'm at 219 right now so that I know is a very reasonable goal, then my next goal I'm sure will be to reach 170 then 150 and so on until I get where I want to be which I'm honestly not sure what number that is,  I will figure it out when I get there.  I just know that I like setting small goals that I can obtain then moving onto the next goal it keeps me focused and when you're reaching your first goals it gets you even more motivated to reach the next goal at least it does for me.


Johnita



Non Surgery - (HW/CW/GW) - - 247/173/150(first major goal)

kitties4
on 5/30/09 7:28 am - Cleveland, OH
I am slowly losing weight, and want to get to around 115 (I'm 261.5 now), but if I think of all the weight I have to lose at once, I'd drive myself crazy.  I take it in 10 pound goals at a time.  In 2001, I was over 300 pounds.  After that, I was in the upper 290s.  Slowly, I've gotten down to the 270s.  Now, I'm at the bottom of the 260s, and will weight myself tomorrow.  I hope to be down in the 250s by then.

I cannot "diet" anymore (go on a regimented, restricted regime to lose weight fast), but I belong to OA, and I pray every day for abstinence (refraining from compulsive overeating) and for the willingness to do whatever it takes to recover from compulsive overeating.  I also pray for the willingness to eat three moderate meals a day with nothing in between, and to choose reasonably healthy foods (not fried, in other words).

I tend to stick to healthy-prepared meats, 1% milk, fresh fruit as much as possible, and a salad twice a week, along with cooked veggies or vegetable soup, and whole grain products, as well.  I do measure my food intake most of the time, so I know what I'm taking in.  I do eat out occasionally, but not that much, since it is an extra expense.  I'm not a "gourmet" cook, but I cook balanced, healthy meals, and an occasional moderate (and sugar-free) dessert twice a week.  I do have candy once a week, on Saturdays when we watch DVDs or go to a movie (which is rare).  I buy a small box of it, and don't eat any more than that, preferably right after a meal.

This is what I do to stay on track.  I realize some of you are on Atkins, South Beach, etc., and that's fine for you.  If you can stick to them, more power to you, but I don't think I could.  Each to their own, I say.

Denise Phares/kitties4
(deactivated member)
on 5/31/09 6:37 am
I have carefully read all your responses - thank you for such thoughtful posts. I guess I waiver in my thinking - not guess, I do waiver in my thinking all the time over this weight loss. I have felt the same way all of you do from time to time in my weight loss and I guess it's because there isn't a clear answer for me that works. Mostly I try to keep my goals small because it's just to devastating to think about how much I need to lose. I also realize that I do need to sometimes refocus on what I'm doing because it's only natural to start to drift away from healthy habits.

So I weighed myself this morning and was pleased to see 2 more pounds drop and I'm feeling good about that loss. I'm taking this time to be more focused on the next small goal.

Skylar
wmcconk
on 6/2/09 3:36 pm, edited 6/3/09 2:36 pm - Fircrest, WA
Congrat's on your 2# loss this week. :)

I started out at 450 lbs. so at first this was about just feeling better, being able to move without pain. As the weight came off and I started feeling better, I not only set scale goals, but personal, fitness goals. I have found that those fitness goals are getting bigger for me. I now want to be a very fit person- whatever my body looks like and whatever weight that brings me. I'm doing Weigh****cher's and would like to be a leader. In order for that to happen I have to be at WW goal weight- which for me would be 150 lbs. I'll have to wait to see when i get closer how realistic that # is for me. But honestly I wasn't sure I'd get where I am today- less than 100 lbs. to lose. To me, that's crazy! lol (I had 300 lbs. to lose when I first started in Jan. 2006.)

I lost my weight with Weight Watcher's & Zumba. I've lost 302 lbs. You can visit my weight loss website at www.freewebs.com/infectiouslaughter
I'll be in the Jan. 2012 issue of People Magazine's "Half Their Weight" issue!!



chellelynn3
on 6/3/09 1:21 pm - san bernardino, CA
 less than 100 lb's to go is amazing! you must feel so wonderful for your acomplishment! please keep updating as you get closer to your goal! so inspiring! 

Michelle Hendrickson Holistic Health Coach http://www.gracioushealth.net

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