Got the laptop tonight

Finally using the internet again...sadly only for one night. I needed it for work stuff and my mom let me borrow hers. I have to report my food has been bad and I haven't worked out. Dinner tonight was good but breakfast and snacks were not. I feel so upset with myself because I know I can do this I mean I was losing 8-10 pounds a week for a while now I'm GAINING weight again. I'm just so upset...Cried watching the biggest loser tonight b/c I was so proud of Kristin and I'm like...I can do that! I can lose like her and be successful at what I'm doing! I've blamed it on everything I posibly can saying it was my mother well we don't live with her anymore so its not her...I said it was the food and we spend 300 dollars on amazingly fresh, healthy food which about 150 bucks worth rotted and got thrown away. UPSETTING!! I want to wake up tomorrow and work out...I want to eat right and I want to lose. I need some kindness guys....really down right now. My anniversery is in 3 months and we're going to San Antonio, Tx where we will be going to Sea World. I want to ride rides with my husband but I'm afraid I'm too big. I would LOVE to be 30 pounds lighter by our anniversery. Sorry guys I let ya down again

Stac

Stacy,

Don't ever say you let us down, this is not about us, this is about YOU.  You think you let yourself down, but reread what you have wrote.  Take one sentence at a time and figure out what to do about it.  This is a learning experience.  Write each sentence down, heck write it down every day.  I'm actually starting to do that with my feelings about food myself.  It's what my doctor recommends, to see what is driving you over the edge.  

You did not get to this weight over night.  It's tough, and it's going to take hard work!  Whenever I see you write like this it reminds me of me at my age.  Then I just want to grab you and shake you to wake up!!lol  Years pass by SO fast.  You have formed habits, BAD habits, which I think resembles mine.  STOP NOW.  Relook at what you want in life.  I know it's easier said than done, believe me do I know.  But you have got to get a grip and hang on for YOUR life.  

This is something to think about.  It isn't what you want to hear at all, but Ive seen your menus when you go off plan, and we do eat a lot alike.  At age 19 I weighed 160, by age 20 180, by age 21 after my first kid it went to I think about 220, now four kids later, and tons of food I'm up to 300.  You see where I'm going with this?  Your weight will NOT go down by itself, it's only going to go higher.  Married life, having babies, eating fast food.  Plus buying all those good veggies just to sit in the fridge while you go out and eat Taco Bell and McDonalds.  Am I right??  I've been there, heck I'm there still alot now!!

It's a habit that you have to break.  Believe me it's harder than hell, and I'm still trying.  Please don't wait until it gets worse.  Make this a priority.  Look at Aubrey tonight, she went home to five kids and only lost ten pounds since the show.  You know what, a wife with five kids,, that to me is GOOD!  Get my drift.  The more kids you have, the more older you get, the harder it is.  More responsibilities, more poeple to take care of, etc.  

Hang in there for dear life girl.  I'm really scared for you, you need to do this and NOW.  I hope I'm not scaring you, but I think you need it. Sherrie just got done tellig me the other day that I need to buckle down and do the same thing before menopause.  She's right!  I've wasted all these years, I'm double my weight from when I was in high school and even at that time I was considered over weight.  Are you ready to take on that much more weight if you don't do anything about it now?

Maybe the plan you are doing isn't working for you?  Think of what you can do to make it work, think HARD.  Your a young beattiful girl with a precious baby that needs you.  TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.  Maybe to start make it a point NOT to eat out anywhere, if that seems to be your problem.  Soul search to see where you are going wrong, or don't like, or don't think you can live with.  Find a plan you can do...

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!! ONE DAY AT A TIME!!

I really want this for you,

I remember the "good intentions" of buying fresh .... well, as fresh as it gets at a store ... food only to have it go bad. Bites, eh?

You are in this to get YOU healthy, not to impress a group of online support friends. If you aren't doing your best, you're not living up to your own good expectations. Nobody on this board will judge you or chew you out. Mary may give you a gentle kick to the behind, but she'll follow it with a hug.

You obviously really do know what you need to do, but I think maybe you're looking at a huge picture rather than moment by moment success. Start speaking positive things about you and your habits, so you won't accidentally encourage poor choices. "I always choose healthy foods" would be a good start.

It's the little decisions, daily, that make or break our goals. One thing I always ask myself is, if everyone who is losing weight with me did what I did today, what would their health look like? Keeps me accountable. 

Don't beat yourself up - pick yourself up. Guess what you get that Kristin gets! A new day.

Ruth

Awwe Sweetie, that sucks that you are gaining weight right when you have a chance to spend some quality time with your hubby at Sea World. 

Let me tell you something that Kristen has learned on the Ranch that you aren't getting.  Discipline and will power.  I realize that those aren't very popular words in the commercialized diet industry...they want to tell you that you don't need it.  That it's all a great new "lifestyle".  Well honey, if you are running off to fast food restaurants to binge on crap, that "lifestyle" ain't workin' for ya!  It's going to take you soldiering up and putting on your big girl drawze to get this job done.  Like I've said before, there are times when I was holding on to my diet by the skin of my teeth and praying to God that he would give me strength to resist _______(insert carb of the moment).  The great news that comes out of hanging on by sheer willpower is that it teaches you something about yourself and what you are capable of.  It's very empowering to know that you can take on a piece of cake and totally tell it to go to hell!  And the more you do that, the easier it gets to keep on doing that until it becomes a part of who you are. 

We know that you can do this, it's just a matter of picking yourself up after you fall.  Success is never staying down!  And here's your hug that Ruthie was talking about. We loves ya, Cutie, and we want to see you whoop this weight loss journey as much as you do!

Mary 

Stacey....I second what everyone else has said.  Holly is right...it gets harder as you get older and I have 20 years on her and 40 on you!!

I have one suggestion I would love to see you try.  Go on amazon.com and order yourself the paperback edition of The Beck Diet Solution.  This isn't a diet....probably heard Kimmie talk about it a few weeks ago....but cognitive behavior techniques that go along with any food plan.  I can't praise it enough.  Just do it chapter by chapter....it goes a day at a time in making small changes in your life.  I think you'll be amazed at how it strategizes for you and gives you techniques to use with your negative thinking and sabotaging behaviors.  I am the QUEEN of both and I think it's really helping me.  My daughter has been plateaued on WW for quite a while now and I bought her a copy of this too and she can't believe the difference it has made in her thinking....she lost 3.2lb this week!

Get a copy from the library first....I did and then realized it would become my bible and I had to have my own copy.  Wonderful way to make small changes that day by day grow into new healthy habits.

Hugs to you....Sherrie