Thinking of opting out of surgery for now!! Sooo scared!!

Hi everyone! Hope all is well!..Earlier this year I qhad finally decided that WLS was right for me and that I was gonna go thru with it: this after about 2 years of contemplation. All the requirements have been done and papers are being prepared to be sent to insurance for approval in about a week or so.  As time gets closer, i am starting to think that this is a 'vanity" issue. I have done so much research on wls and I can honestly say that i am not ready for that dramatic change, physically, emotionally, socially.etc... I do not want to be overweight but I can not seem to get control over my eating habits....I had lost about 35 pounds on my own about a year ago over a 5 month period, however, i have gained it all back and then some. I am so scared that wls is my only option and i am letting it slip thru my fingersPlease, anyone with feedback or some motivational words....please reply!!!

Just do it! You didn't come this far to stop. Keep going, pray about it talk to God and all will be well.

Hi mahogany! I would say, of course, based on this one and only post, your decision is not so much about vanity - hey that is a factor for all of us somewhere in this mix, c'mon...even those who don't admit it can at least face it to themselves here and there.

I really think and completley agree that the real trouble is, you have not found the Disciplined YOU just yet.  Don't worry - she IS in there.

I support you for that.  Please do get her up on deck and find some self- pride about that you CAN do this.  Lose weight, not have surgery I mean!

Who knows...maybe surgery is NOT the answer for you. I know for myself that I had to stop up short and say wait a damn minute here - WLS is NOT the goal,,,,it is one possibility on how to handle this.

YANNO????  the goal is to get some discipline in our life, find the traits that can help us change and make those changes stick!

Welcome...nice to have a new crew building up in here.

Mahogany - the dirty truth is "diets don't work".  ONLY 2 to 5% of people who lose weight with diet and rigerous daily exercise alone keep the weight off.  These are true champions and yes you can be one of them BUT chances are if you don't become a certified personal trainer, an aerobics instructor, a lifetime member at Weigh****chers who is also a group leader or receptionist, a lifetime member at OA  -attending meetings for life. Or something else in the fitness/ weight loss field, you will have a slim chance of keeping the weight off.

The kicker is weight loss surgery helps BUT you still have to stay on top of the game.  Sweets, it's NOT the easy way out.  You are saving your life, you are allowing yourself more opportunities and a better quality of life.  It is very sad to say it, but people treat you different when you are not so heavy.  It may be that we feel different too and people respond in a more positive way.

The choice is yours.  I'll tell you though if I had to do it again, I would in a heartbeat.  I wish I had considered the option or had the option sooner when I was really struggling - when I was auditioning and would have been considered for more parts.  I am sure that I would have had more options with better quality men to.  People do judge you on appearance AND can we blame them when we also like "nice lookin' things".

Take this chance to blossom Mahogany  - to give your baby girl a better quality of life too.

* One thing that is extremely important is that you have an excellent, excellent doctor  the other is that you have researched the WLS and opted for the best one for you AND third is that you have to be really ready - it is no free ride, for the best result and health you have to do what is required.

Leila

God Bless and if you'd like to talk let me know.

Mahogany, I don't know you so it would be hard to advise you whether or not to have surgery.  But I will say this.  The main thing that got my attention in your post was the fact that you said you didn't know if you were mentally prepared for the dramatic change that weight loss would bring.  You are a very wise woman!  I know several people who have had WLS and had a hard time dealing with the fact that they know longer recognized the person they had become.  For some that is a blessing, for some it can lead to heartbreak.  I know one lady who left her husband because his wife was a fat chick and she wasn't.  How weird is that?  And let's not even get started on the fact that she started running around with all kinds of weirdos...it was just sad.

But you didn't mention any comorbidities, so it doesn't sound like you are desperate for surgery right away.  I would say that if you have the option to wait, then wait.  Having your guts rerouted is a SERIOUS thing.

Best wishes,

Mary

Thank you all for the feedback , it has really been helpful.Unfortunately, I still have not made a decision and I know it will take time. It is like when I hear positive outcomes and great storiesl, I am all for it. However, when I hear stories from those who have had less desirable side effects, I start to get discouraged. I am not beating myself up about it because that is human nature......no one wants a negative outcome. But I wonder...do  I have time to wait/// Mary, thanx for responding by the way, mentioned that I did not have any co-morbidities so I could afford to wait. Well that is not the case, I just didnt mention them. I am 27 and I am an asthmatic, have high blood pressure, borderline diabetic, have gallstones, gastritis, and a hiatal hernia. One of my worst fears now is that my PMD will soon diagnose me with diabetes. I am also noticing that my knees hurt  really, really, bad now.....i am still fairly young ( 27) so I am pretty active, I can still push past the pain but for how long. So once again thank all who took the time to read and respond....I am still confused but I know I will eventually make the right decison for me and try to make the best of it!!!