New to this board...hopped off the RNY train

In 2007 I decided to go for bypass after trying to lose a mere 120 pounds for so long.  I originally wanted lap-band, but after many comsultations, imy surgeon told me RNY would be best.. See, Im not a big eater at all...never even stress eat.  I never eat breakfast because I just ain't in the mood for food that early.  I skip lunch about 3 x's per week, because if I drink coffee and have a smoke, I have no appetite for hours.  Dinner I finally come alive and eat, and it's never like a sit down course meal, it's whatever I make for my kid, or something I can whip up with chicken and vegetables...I never even eat processed food and Im active and never snack during the day.  At that time, I weighed in at 293.
And for someone like me, young and into fashionable things, that weight made me hate myself so bad.

Basically, my weight problems are genetic and having nothing to do with how much I eat. 
So RNY is good for making your body absorb less calories...good for someone like me who could gain weight from water and air! lol:)

Well, the doc told me to lose 15 pounds pre-op to shrink the liver.  I ended up losing the 15, then 20, then 30, and now I am down to 250 since May. 
I had to put my surgery off so I could deal with my new career move and a divorce, and thought it would  just be too much on my plate at once...then I figured, i am down almost 50 lbs on my own.  I look  better, feel better and I don't need this surgery anymore.  I even work with 2 women who have had it done, the one eats all day long, and is losing very slowly, and the other still walfs down huge cheesteaks and hasnt lost anything...so Im thinking this surgery isn't even that great like I thought.

So now, I am at kind of a plateau and hope to be able to kick off at least 5 more pounds by the end of this month. 

I need to jumpstart my motivation.

Anybody here have some good tips for me since I have chosen to lose weight the natural way?

Also, what is a good vitamin to use?  Since I began losing, my hair has become an awful mess, and last night I pulled a handful and a half of it out and I believe its because Im not getting enough of what I need.
 

First of all congratulations on you weight loss thus far!  It takes something I am not sure I have to do that.

Hair loss is a sign of lack of protein.  You need more meat and eggs and dairy in your diet.  It's nothing you can get from a pill, however there are protein powders and drinks out there. 

Also, I just posted about a web site called   sparkpeople.com   It  is a wonderful free diet site and will tell you how much protein you need daily.  The also e-mail short daily motivational and educational readings to you.  They offer a whole lot more than I can describe.  And I haven't received any junk mail for joining.  You might want to check it out.

Best of luck,

Deb

Hey Deb/BeachB.....I am new to the site too and posting...and was soooooooo thankful that there were forums for those of us who have strongly considered the surgery route and have decided that maybe for now its not for us.  You know I give you tons of kudos for just not thinking...oh well I am going to have surgery so why bother really trying to lose more.....I think many go there....its not hard to do.....and at a recent lapband seminar I asked this one lapbander why she decided to continue with the surgery, even though she has lost 80 pounds prior to the date of her surgery....she just said she knew she couldn't do it alone.....and then I asked her if she'd ever get it removed...and she said no...that she'd gain it all back if she did.  This was the one statement that really changed it all for me.....thinking that if you do have the surgery, no matter which type you opt for....and just resort back to old habits....and totally lean on this 'tool'....won't you just regain it all back?  And it hit me, no matter how I try to lose this...I too have the same amount to lose as you started out with....if I can't somehow get my head around it all....and I am an emotional eater....sometimes I dont even care about the food, its more to numb whatever stressfull situation I'm in at the moment...but if I dont get a handle on the whys behind the stuffing of high fat food to make myself feel a bit better.....it doens't matter what I lose, when I lose, how I lose....it will come back on.  And man I do not want to put my body and mind through this yet again.  I've already lost some good chunks (once 89lbs. and 60lbs) and gained it all back....wont go to that place again.  I am convinced now, that at the time I was losing for all the wrong reasons....but at the time they seemed like the right ones.....to look better in clothes....wear a size such and such. Not that that is not natural...but now for the first time I am more concerned about my health.  And realizing that the other two or more times...I didn't get my head straight where food was concerned.  I didn't really tackle why I gained it in the first place.  And as I lost the weight...my mind wasn't along for the ride!!  So by the time my mind slowly caught up to the party, my body was like...whoa....food--yes....I want that numbing feeling again!  And by then the rollercoater of gaining was on its way up yet again.

What I might try to do to answer your hair issue and Deb you really have hit it on the spot I think....is either try to see a nutritionist in the area or dig out one of the countless foods books I have purchased over the years and actually read it :)  But you probably have a few WLS books....its kinda cool to read them too...and see just how these patients (the ones that succeed anyhow, maybe not the ones in your office) get their nutrients in.

And yeah sparkpeople is really helpful too...I've been getting their emails etc. for a couple years now...anything you can get helps....to keep motivated....I am so happy I found these boards too..everyone knows the same struggles and can help with tips and advice we need.  I know that your post today was a welcome one.....cause I just came off a few hard months of wondering if surgery was for me...it was to the point where I have gone back and forth so many times my head was spinning.  And my best friend recently had gastric and like so many just out....is not very happy she did it.  I hope that she doesn't fall into the same category as your co-workers but in the mode of being thrilled and happy with it.  But I have to tell you....the few people I have met that have had it.....there is this underlying feeling I get that along they are 'skinny' again....they dont all seem that happy with what they did....or how it changed their life...many seem to always be sick or dumping or feeling deprived....one I know is constantly depressed.....I know these are the tough stories and for ever one of them there are success happy stories....but I just feel the need to learn to live with food...make peace with it on my terms.   Somehow I want to learn to step up and take control....there is a part of me that realizes as my friend loses weight at a much more rapid pace as I will (we are the exact same weight/size) I will feel thrilled for her....but doubt my choice of not having it.....but I think in the long run....it will be the healthiest choice for me.  To learn that everything in moderation and not have to have a band around my stomach or have my insides re-arranged.....and you know something.....my guess is, you feel a lot better about things now...knowing that you were able to tackle this headon and didn't have to have the added tool of surgery? Because people who have sugery can gain it all back just as much as those who dont.....congrats to you...keep pluggin away at it....eventually one month will turn into two, then ten then you'll be where you want to be.

As Deb recommended spark people....there is this email I started getting back when I read an amazing book from a woman named Linda Spangle....even though she is someone behind Medifast (yeah tried that one too lol) I still continue to get her emails that come a couple times a month they are AMAZING....no matter what program you chose to follow or just your own, her little pep talks and great insight really help me on my eating etc.  Dont know if this will come through...but thought I'd try to attach the one I just got the other day...and maybe it will be of some help...I am really loving Jenny craig and finally found a program I can live with..but doesn't matter....this still helps me...hey, we need all the motivation we can get right??.....take care both of you...and thank you for the inspiration!! Chloe in Maryland   ps I just really love this thought of taking ownership....its very empowering!!!

Got a minute? That's long enough to take ownership

The Wt. Loss Minute By Linda Spangle, RN, MA
Author: 100 Days of Weight Loss
www.WeightLossJoy.com

Great idea: It's up to me to make it work!

My younger sister used to have the most beautiful, long blonde
hair. When I was in high school, I decided I was sick of my
short, limp red hair, and that I wanted to grow it long like
hers. So I brushed my hair one hundred strokes every night,
soaked the ends in egg yolks and mayonnaise, and took special
vitamins guaranteed to make hair grow.

But after six months of these intense efforts, my hair still
barely reached my shoulders. In the meantime, my sister's hair
grew even more and now hung almost to her waist. All I could
think of was 'It just isn't fair!'

You've probably had these thoughts about people who can eat
anything, yet never gain weight. It just isn't fair. Yet in
reality, the number of people who never gain weight is probably
similar to the percentage who are capable of growing hair that
reaches their waist. What really counts is that you take care of
YOU and manage your own weight in the best way possible.

It's up to me!

When you are committed to your weight-loss goals, you take
responsibility for your own outcomes. That means you may need to
stop blaming others when you slip up, and instead, figure out a
strategy for coping better the next time. You also need to
eliminate 'if only' excuses such as 'If only I had more time,
more money, a new job or a supportive spouse, I'd be able to
stay on my diet.'

Research shows that successful dieters share one common
theme--they take 'ownership' of their efforts. To make this
concept work, you have to simply figure out what works for you,
then do it. If you have a bad day (or week) don't just give up
and quit. Instead, take some time to study what happened.
Identify where you let things go, didn't follow through or
otherwise contributed to your own struggle. Ask yourself, 'What
can I learn from this?'

Build your ownership

With ownership, you accept that 'It's my body. It's my problem.
And it will also be my own efforts that make me successful.'
Once you reach this conclusion, you realize you have ultimate
power over what happens in your efforts to manage your weight.

Although I kept trying, I never was able to grow long hair. So
finally, I stopped thinking 'It's not fair,' and instead, I took
ownership by getting my hair permed and styled like some of the
magazine photos. Sometimes, I think my sister wished she'd had
the option of using gel and spray to create a dozen different
looks. But instead she was stuck with long, straight hair. Some
things in life just aren't fair.

For more ideas on staying committed, see Day 3 in '100 Days of
Weight Loss.'

Know others who've got a minute? Forward this ezine and brighten
their day.

Want to comment on this ezine? Click 'Reply' and send me a note.

Previous issues:
http://www.rapidwtloss.com/index.php?page_id=366

P.S. If you're a regular reader of this ezine, you know that
I've been taking some time off this summer to take care of a
pesky neck and shoulder problem related to years of computer
use. Because of that, I'm resending some of the favorite
newsletters from the past couple years. Even though you may
recognize the content, please review the lessons in each one,
and use them to move forward in your life goals.

Copyright Linda Spangle, 2008. #0825, Weight Loss for Life, Inc.
5023 W. 120th Ave. #183, Broomfield, CO 80020
Contact: [email protected]
www.weightlossjoy.com
303-452-1545 or 1-800-298-3020

Beach Bunny:
Congratulations on your weight loss efforts!  The non-op board is a great source of encouragement. 
After reading your post, what stands out to me is the limited number of meals you eat on a daily basis.  Eating every few hours keeps your metabolism stoked.  I went years skipping breakfast and lunch and IMO, it ruins your metabolism.  After going so long without fuel, your body holds onto EVERYTHING you eat.  It never sunk in until I heard how Sumo wrestlers get so large - they only eat one meal a day, very late at night.  Their bodies are starved during the day and then gorged at night.  I'm not suggesting you're gorging, but instead trying to make a point.  I eat 5-6 times a day and it keeps me satisfied and I've been able to maintain my weight loss.  I also sit down for my meals rather than picking at food - sitting down ensures I see the quantity of food I'm eating and if I just graze, calories can add up very quicky without me realizing it.
Different strategies work for different folks; just my suggestion for trying a new approach.
Best wishes for continued success!
Kim

Wow, thanks guys for all your words...being overweight for me is one of the biggest things holding me back from doing so many things.
I will try to put some more protein in my diet...It's just I can't seem to conjure up appetite.  I even bought slim fast last week, and was having to force it down my throat each day...and it tastes great. i stopped figuring, well, why put the calories in me, if i dont even want to eat in the first place?
i have no fear of eating...just i can only eat when im hungry.....but thats me, i sleep when im tired, eat when im hungry...no set times or anything.
so anyway, i will try to sneak some protein shakes in. i cant stand eggs or anything like that....lol that reminds me of one of the bad things about RNY, i was reading women who were literally putting sandwhiches, or chicken or anything into the blender the first few weeks, and drinking it! im sorry but the bare thought of having to drink my steak is making my gut turn this moment.

jee im the pickiest fat person i swear!
oh body, why hath thou betrayed me?

;)

I did not read any other psots yet, but surely someone mentioned protein - make sure you get enough. i would add do not avoid good fats like olive oil, fat from dairy and meat - these macronutrients will keep you satisfied longer.

Also take some B supplements! 

Welcome...and what did you eat to lose if eating chicken and veggies and avoiding processed stuff kept you fat?

My body is the same weigh...i mean way. Just hard to let go of fat!

Every once in awhile I lurk on this board.  To give you some encouragement  I have a brother who has been able to keep his weight off for more than 20 years.  He could actually gain a few pounds.  He does this by running about 50 miles a week.  He is not married, has no children or stress.  He also keeps track of all the calories he eats.  So he is one of the 5% of people who have succeeded in keeping his weight down.  Unfortunately I don't have his discipline.  So I had the band.  I am not posting to talk about the band.  Your story touched me and I wish you loads of luck.  One of the tools I have used for a long time  is www.healthfitcounter.com   It is a little expensive but worth it.  It helped me get some weight off before surgery and now it is a habit that I record everything on it, just to make sure I am getting enough protein etc.  Good luck to you.