Officially giving up...
I told 2 nurses about the weight gain during one of those triage parts of a doctor's visit. They LAUGHED at me and told me my scale was broken. There's no sense in telling anyone anymore. Who wants the humiliation!
I told my doctor in Florida and all he said was "be sure you take the Lasix every day". Hell .. I double it up to 80 mgs most of the time. WTF. So after I hear that I'm a hypocondriac bull****ter from so called "professionals", I either start to believe it (although I still see gains of 10 or 20 lbs in a matter of a few days, or I give up on trying to figure it out.
This has nothing to do with faith. It has all to do with a lack of character... a lifetime of destructive behavior coming back to bite me in the ass.
You are not allowed to abuse that body with white castle, lean pockets and big floofy white bread sandwiches.
THAT is my pal Lori's body you are f*ckin with right there. She is a valuable, loving lady who gives with 110%.
Get OUT of Lori's body this instant! Let her eat some ezekial bread sandwiches. let her have some barley & garden veggies. Let her have white beans/Italian parsely and roasted garlic on dreamfields pasta......She may need some GOOD carbs right now, but she does NOT need the poison YOU are feeding her.
Lori, do NOT eat that crap then blame carbs on your inevitable weight gain. I will not pretend to know what is up with your body - it is the weirdest crap I've ever encountered. But i do know one thing: maybe you DO need to not eat the way you have been eating. It is so very restrictive; I marvel every day, but layoff you as you find your way.
Deep breath, my sister...let's reason this out.
"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not." ~Mark Twain
Thank goodness I didn't get rid of my super fat clothes yet.
Look.. I'm going to keep doing this... time after time... lose 10.. gain 20... lose 20... gain 15.. on and on and on.. it's been going on for the past year. It's probaby been happening all of my life but before this past year I was too fat to notice it. This is probably why I gained 15 lbs doing nutri system.
I just don't want to fight it anymore. I'm sick to death of the constant cooking ... of having to rush around at 5 in the morning to get Jon's meals ready for the day, then stuff an egg in before rushing to the gym with a blaring headache to sweat my ass off only to come home and see how much I've gained.
Enough is enough. Thank GOD I didn't bother with WLS.. it would have been a waste.
I think that for some of us.. no matter how hard we work it.. it's just not gonna happen. Hey.. my brother was nearly 600 lbs when he died.... that's where I'm going. I've been delaying the inevitable while causing myself physical pain.. it just makes no sense.
I don't know what kind of food you're talking about... I don't do oatmeal.. I hate it.... I don't like rice... I don't like cereals and pasta is poison to me as are breads (I never checked my bs after Ezekial bread but I don't like that cardboard anyway). I love fruit, but it's poison.....
It doesn't really matter after the crapfest yesterday and through the night anyway. I've never.. and I mean NEVER eaten so much chocolate. I'm not even a fan of sweets.
(((((HUGGGGSSS))))
Awwe Lori, your having a hell of a time. I don't blame you one bit for eating like this today, I would probably do the same. Now with that said, you are a lot stronger woman than myself so this is just killin' me thinking you are doing this.
I see it as two things. One..Mary is right, that something is most definitely wrong and we need to figure out what it is. We already know this happens on occasion. The other thing is, just like a few have said, I also sort of cringe at what you eat everyday. But it's worked for you so I keep my mouth shut..your a grown woman knowing what you are doing. But I have to say, I'm scared the same thing that happened to me is happening to you. That is weight slowly creeping back up because your use too a tiny bit of food intake. You know you've been eating a little more than you usually do. Your body isn't use to it at all. Another thing I thought of, is that you've been working out vigorously it seems lately, or am I wrong?? Between all of these things you need to cut yourself some slack.
Look back at what you always eat, and see whats going on. Also think about your new meds your on. I know this has happened before also, so that right there puts a twist into everything. But I can't quite shake that you have been increasing your food intake while on new meds AND trying to quit smoking, and you have increased your workout routines. All of this to me equals a little bit of weight gain.
Hang in there girl, you're gone way to far to give up. If you have to increase maybe a starch and a veggie a day?? Or even just more veggies? Just a thought, but please don't give up. Your bodies trying to figure out what the hell your doing to it. I personally like Kims idea, go take it outside and shoot the damn thing. Heck, if I had a gun I probably would be joining you. :)
I give up
whether I've been eating a little more than usual or not is inconsequential... I workout at LEAST 2 hours a day... and I'm not talking about walking around the gym engaging in idle chit chat... I work my ass off!
So.. folks thought I didn't eat enough, but now I eat too much cause I increased it by a couple of eggs? Sorry................................ it take 3500 cal to gain a lbs. There is NO F*CKING WAY I ate 30,000 calories in the last couple of days.. nevermind for the whole freakin' month.
bottom line is that I was meant to be fat and I'm fighting it like a jerk.
As of right now I am no longer trying to quit smoking either... that's just another lesson in futility......
Let's see, I've managed at least 150 carbs today.. by tomorrow I'll be up another 10 lbs....
ahhhhhhhhhhh whatever (and I hate that word "whatever".. it's so cowardly but it certainly fits right now).....
LOL, I hate the word whatever also. Feel like knocking my kids out whenever they say it to me. Dh will get knocked out!hehe
Just out of curiosity, what did the doc say last time you had water gain? I remember you had an appointment for it. I think I must of missed seeing what happened at the docs.
Try to relax a little, spoil yourself today, you deserve it.
Well, let me know tomorrow if you made it through your diabetic coma tonight from all the unrefined simple sugars you are ingesting into that fabulous fit bod of yours. I mean I would hate to lose my partner so early in.
I understand your plight and share your frustration. I've been stuck in the same freakin' 20 pounds for 2 months now. Enough is enough! I give, too. Thank you for giving me the courage.
Let me know if there are any foods I should focus on to the get the job done as quickly as possible.
Love you even in the midst of your pain and frustration,
Beth
You are changing, butterfly! ~ Neecee
Keep doin' the do! ~ Future Legend
