OT: When was I supposed to learn to read minds?

OK, so I got this new job bus driving. Well, they are constantly needing new drivers and monitors. My daughter got hired as a monitor and my mom and I have been doing everything in our power to get her through all the stuff she needs to do to get going.

So, now, here comes my hubby's ex-wife's son, age 19, needs a job. Ok, I'm a nice person. I'll help him get there to put the application in. So I get that all lined up for yesterday and he gets interviewed and hired on the spot. In turn, they line him up with a physical for 10 am this morning. He never asked anyone to take him down for the physical so I assume he is going ot have a friend or his sister take him. Cool by me.

This morning his mom comes over and says, "Alex was ready to go for his physical this morning but no one showed up. He asseumed you or your mom were taking him down."  I told her, "He NEVER asked. He should have so someone would know. If I don't get asked for help, I assume the person has other plans." Well, she acted miffed at me.

My questions (out of sheer frustration and sarcasm, of course) are: When did he become MY responsibility and when the heck was I supposed to learn to read minds? I mean I know they only have one car but dang, I have had days when I had to take my hubby to work and then go back and pick him up so I could use the car mid-day. Besides, this kid wants to ride to work with me and I may not even be working out of the same lot as him, then what? I truly don't mind helping but if you are going to start the process, at least have a plan to follow thru and don't expect someone else to hold your hand. It's hard enough doing this for my own daughter and myself let alone adding another abled but lazy body to the mix.

Sorry, just frustrated and needed to vent a little.
Beth

You have a RIGHT to be frustrated and upset!!    VALIDATION! 

I absolutely DESPISE when people expect something of me yet never tell me it was expected!!  That's only #1.  #2.  While I'm sure you care deeply for this boy, you do have your own family you are taking cae of.  If she is miffed at you, guess what... THAT'S HER PROBLEM.. not yours.

The job is HIS job, not yours.. you have your own, and part of accepting the responsibility of employment is also accepting the repsonsibility of fulfilling the requirements for that position.

I hate to be mean here... but did he expect you to **** in the cup for him too?

You do what you can... you seem to even do what you can't..... so her being miffed at you should be her being miffed at herself for not making herself more available for her son!  END OF STORY!

Give yourself an ATTA GIRL for doing all you could do to begin with. ; Not a lot of stepmoms would!  PS... reminding your husband's X to say "thank you" for going above and beyond as it is should be well in order.

God says to give all.... God also says "don't be a fool".

Thing is he not my stepson. He is her son by a man other than my husband. Her older two, ages 29 and 34, are my stepchildren. Where were they to help their brother?

Thank you, Lori. I was praying I wasn't seeing this the wrong way. He does have to do for himself. He is 19. Time to be an adult as I keep telling my 18yr old daughter.

Well i do believe that future legend said it all!!

He is 19 and he needs to grow up and start taking some responsibility! One thing that i was told at work...was to never assume!!! He shouldnt of assumed that you were going to take him when he never even asked! I figure if he wants this job bad enough...he will figure out a way. It shouldnt be all put on you. And the ex..yeah she will get over it!! She has no reason to be miffed with you..people are amazing aren't they??

This one takes the cake as far as being dumber than a box of rocks. She ask for one favor then thinks she deserves 10. She's always been like that and that is exactly why while staying on freindly speaking terms with her has always been a goal of mine because of the two children and now 6 grandchildren involved, I will NEVER be friends with her. I can't do it because, frankly, she dumber than owl **** and it drives me up the wall.

Better yet... gimme her name.. I'll kick her butt for you!   LOL  (just trying to get a little giggle out of you)

Lori, if you can kick her butt with that bum hip of yours more power to ya hunny. Come and get her!

I threatened to beat her ass one time myself about 20 years ago LOL Now that was a sight. I came flying off the back of my "new" hubby's motorcycle and threatened to take her on in the middle of the street about 1/2 block from my mom and dad's house. I think my hubby about **** his pants. lol

Thanks for the giggle and standing up for me.

You are hereby validated! OMG...I don't know that kid but $100 says he had no intention of going down there.

I bet he could find a ride to go play video games or score some other kind of fun???? Any takers on that?

I don't think he'll last. I think he'll be too lazy to get up off his butt and find a ride when I can't give him one and his mommy will be right there telling him why it's not his fault. Oh well, his life, live and learn.

She had no right to blame this on you. It's too bad she doesn't realize this. I'm just wondering if he told her that you were taking him. My sons nineteen also so I know quite a few 19 and 20 year old boys. I tell ya, sometimes I literally feel like I have to thump em on the head and literally spell things out for them. LOL, I actually did that this morning tell you the truth. :)

He will learn soon enough that he can't have his hand held all the time. I really wonder half the time if these kids are scared ****less most of the time. I know I have been told a few times that my son literally doesn't know what to do, or even what to say at some businesses, and he's a smart kid! It's like he's just so overwhelmed. It just amazes me, it's like they are scared to go out in the world after they yearned it all through out there teenage years.

Then theres my daughter who is 17 and probably your daughter. I have no worries at all, the only worry I have for her is that she will spend her whole paycheck at the mall! :) Think guys maturity level keeps on going until they are 30 or so..haha. Heck, my dh is 32 and I can't get him to stop playing his video games.

You did your part, you were a good step mom and did what you thought he wanted and needed. He'll grow up sooner or later!