Too sensitive or just approach feelings differently?

I see the thread on oversensitivity and think about what I just posted in my blog (see below).  I had a moment today during the workout that made my briefly cry.  My teammates reacted like my emotion was foreign to them.  I don't get it--am I "oversensitive" and they just not as sensitive?  Frankly, I think it's more that people don't know how to  handle someone feeling their emotion.  And I think it's cultural.  My ethnicity (Italian and others) has a culture of emotion.  So I allow myself the emotion before I let it go. So, a flip side to the concept/topic of oversensitivity, I think. (Which I haven't read, just saw the subject) Anyway, here' s the blog post: Okay, so a few tears came during today's workout. We did a variety of lower body and core work. Some of which was fun. I got to roll a 150-lb tire, which for me was nothing and for everyone else was a struggle. He he. But I got my come-upence (what is the spelling for that word?!). The Roman chair. That's the one where you hold your body up with your arms as if in a chair and tuck in your legs. I gave Ian this look of dread--I couldn't do one just last month. Then it was such a disappointment. I felt that feeling coming back. So, I said something, and he said just try or something to that effect, and so I positioned myself. I could only do the tucks, not straight leg raises. But I got 9 or 10 tucks. Remember, I couldn't get one before. Okay, progress, and I noted that. But I walked away and started to tear up with frustration. Karen noticed and asked if I was okay and then everyone was looking at me. I tried to explain, "I just really want to be able to do these." It was that frustration of knowing what to tell your body, and your body not yet being fully cooperative or capable. The team offered some encouragement, but we're different. I believe--feel your emotion because it exists, then find a place for it, and move on. It's like they, including Ian, don't think you should have the emotion to begin with. Karen, who is approximately 320 lbs said, "If I cried everytime I couldn't do something..." I know what she was getting at--there's a lot she can't do. I understand. But it was just one moment of frustration. I felt it, it's over with. Just let me have it for that moment. KWIM?

I read most of the things you write and ugh your group sucks lol. As in like nice wise. If you want to cry go for it as long as you're not doing it every time you're there. Which you don't.  So I mean everyone has those moments of frustration and it leading to tears. I've been there. Everyone has. So ignore them you're allowed to do as you please and allowed to have emotions. So yea...

Three more weeks and I'm back to one-on-one training.  Yeah!  I think it's best for me, mentally and physically. I trained with another trainer, Karissa, last Sunday and it reminded me how good it feels to train to YOUR best ability.  No influence of others' work on yours.  No self-critical thought of "they're faster/better/fitter than me".  No my strengths making them feel week either (and yes, I get looks for my strength--today I was told, well you're as strong as an ox...thanks for that image, team). Anyway, Karissa, who is my backup trainer should I need it, told me she loved training me--I don't whine, I persevere, and she's amazed at my strength.  (Other trianers have said I'm the perfect client--I have goals, abilities, determination, and the right attitude.)  For me she was good because I needed the encouraging words that Ian has not been providing in group.  I needed the "one more, you can do it" that he's too distracted to say when he's focusing on 4 people. (I needed that today.) She knows the strain I suffered with him (hopefully past tense) and said, I would love to be your trainer if you need it.  She knows it's okay for now, but good to have a back up, I think.  If nothing else, it's also a good friendly rapport. My team will continue on as a group without me.  I need for myself to focus on being my best and not letting anything hold me back.  My talk with Ian's mentor really helped me see that a lot of the issue was due to my experience...training with Ian for months and how that had advanced me.  I guess I hadn't wanted to accept that--that I was 'advanced'. And by my blog post, I guess I also don't want to accept that some things still need so much work! I will improve on the chair, but I'm IMPATIENT.

In due time in due time. You have to be patient lol. And Karissa sounds like a good trainer maybe even better than Ian but that is for you to decide in the end.  I remember back when I had a trainer. This was when I was 15 and 16. 15 I had to do Physical Therapy to make the muscles around my ACL tear stronger so I could play on it. 16 I had the same trainer for Physical Therapy after my Reconstruction surgery for that tear. Ofcourse at age 16 I had a crush on him...gosh he was beautiful lmao. I actually seen him at the tanning salon the other day! Anyways...he would push me to my fullest. I would complain and whine but he always knew I would do it anyways. Like the stair stepper I always told him "You know I dislike you for making me do these" He always replied "After you make it big for Softball you will add me to your thank you list" I always laughed.  I remember the first time after my surgery when he believed I was ready to run on a tredmill. I was scared to death that my knee would snap or something. He made me do it encourging me it would be alright. I wish I had him as a trainer now. I remember on my last day of therapy he said you can come back still and just work out if you want.....I never did. I regret that highly! He kept me in shape.  My point is you need a trainer to encourage you and keep you up beat. SOmeone to push you till you cant take it anymore and still add one more in there! So it is good that you have Karissa as a back up!

They're both good.  See, Ian used to be a little softer with me...emotionally.  Maybe he feels he needs to harden me up, or maybe it was the change from 1-1 to group.  I still will give it a chance back in 1-1 because he's a more well rounded trainer than Karissa.  She's great in so many ways, but he offers more for my body and goals, she offers the softness and encouragement I'd been missing as of late.

So, I must try to be patient for th 1-1.

 

Such a strange thing, these relationships with trainers.  Love/Hate!

You said it yourself, "Maybe it is your life or a big part of it. I cry when someone hurts me, when i get hurt, when I feel God in myworship and have cried in frustration because I couldn't do something I wanted to do. "