The FUNK!
Alrighty then.. the funk has officially arrived!
I don't know what it is! I'm losing weight, faster than I could have imagined, but I'm in so much darned pain right now and I'm bored and feeling lost and useless and all those ugly things I call myself that sound like an invitation to a double chocolate cake party or a Tira Misu fest! So here and now I'm shooting for an emotional enema instead!
I pulled my back out ... get this.. opening a package of salami this morning. NO.. .not a 20 lb salami... a freakin' 6 oz package!! It was one of those pull apart packages.... ALL so I could put 2 pieces of freakin' salami in Jon's lunch. I went to the gym anyway.. and out of pissedoffedness, while someone was scammin' my trainer over in the corner (but really scammin' my time and I HATE that), I threw 150lbs on the bar and did some shoulder presses while I was waiting. I shouldn't have, but I was BORED and I'm so sick of ***** footing around with baby weights. I should have yelled BL*W him or PAY him, but GET OFF MY DIME! But noooooooooo, I remained polite! 
After a couple of sets of those, my neck got tight and I got on the floor anyway to do adductors and abductors and hip thrusts when Andrew finally made his escape.. I went through the routine, ******g and moaning in my head.. even tried to get out of it a few times by saying "so.. we're done.. right" even AFTER getting pissed at the time scam <-- makes no sense. But the little **** was wise to my moves and had me to leg curls and some sidestepping with the band WHICH I HATE, AND DOUBLE leg press ... but I had to insist we were going with 200. 115? C'mon.. I'll do that with my pinky toe.. it's frustrating!.
Alrighty then.. I come home.. in a funk, kinda depressed and decide "ok, I'm taking a ride up to Jersey". I call Jon to tell him and he decides he WANTS TO COME! NOOOOOOOOooooooooo.. so if I leave without him, I gotta feel guilty... if I take him, I gotta wait until he gets home from work. So screw it.. I'm not going. Then I think.. I'll just take a ride out to Iowa (he wouldn't wanna go there), but I don't think I can put this back in the car for 17 hours and still be lucid when I get there. OWIE! Then I think, FIND A MASSAGE and all that comes up are escort services! I don't need no friggin' escort.. I need a strong man with big hairy hands who knows how to dig into the knots on my back!
I find others, and no offense intended here for folks who do massage.... but I need deep tissue stuff and I want a MAN who's got no problem grinding my knots.
I go throw in laundry and notice something on the floor which looks like leaves the cats might have dragged in, begin to sweet.. and it's CAT SH*T... grrrrrrrrrrrrr.... so then I gotta wash my broom! If that broom had 5 on the floor, I could have taken off on that cat poo*****
Yea.. I'm a complainin' ova heah. So then I say to myself "just take a sleeping pill and sleep through this funk".. but.. here I am.. ta daaaaaaaa wide awake but a little off kilter, so now I'm HERE, BORED, FUNKY, TOO rubberheaded to go anywhere, and still not sleeping. I just wanna kick the monitor right off the table (and I'm really trying not to throw things> I don't wanna go back to the kichen and be a good little kitchen ***** I'm done waking up to find someone snuck in here and committed a disaster area all over the counter for me to clean... So i took 2 more and topped them with a couple of tylenol pm. Yea..I'll just FLY THROUGH THE AIR to NJ and be back in time to iron Jon's clothes.
That's it.... still growling.. avoiding the little special areas where I know the treats are stashed cause even if it was a mistake, the scale said 228.3 and I don't want to give it up. Just a coke.. a coke.... 1 freakin' coke would settle me!
Gawd, I really hate this life..... I wanna get a new one.
After a couple of sets of those, my neck got tight and I got on the floor anyway to do adductors and abductors and hip thrusts when Andrew finally made his escape.. I went through the routine, ******g and moaning in my head.. even tried to get out of it a few times by saying "so.. we're done.. right" even AFTER getting pissed at the time scam <-- makes no sense. But the little **** was wise to my moves and had me to leg curls and some sidestepping with the band WHICH I HATE, AND DOUBLE leg press ... but I had to insist we were going with 200. 115? C'mon.. I'll do that with my pinky toe.. it's frustrating!.
Alrighty then.. I come home.. in a funk, kinda depressed and decide "ok, I'm taking a ride up to Jersey". I call Jon to tell him and he decides he WANTS TO COME! NOOOOOOOOooooooooo.. so if I leave without him, I gotta feel guilty... if I take him, I gotta wait until he gets home from work. So screw it.. I'm not going. Then I think.. I'll just take a ride out to Iowa (he wouldn't wanna go there), but I don't think I can put this back in the car for 17 hours and still be lucid when I get there. OWIE! Then I think, FIND A MASSAGE and all that comes up are escort services! I don't need no friggin' escort.. I need a strong man with big hairy hands who knows how to dig into the knots on my back!
I find others, and no offense intended here for folks who do massage.... but I need deep tissue stuff and I want a MAN who's got no problem grinding my knots.
I go throw in laundry and notice something on the floor which looks like leaves the cats might have dragged in, begin to sweet.. and it's CAT SH*T... grrrrrrrrrrrrr.... so then I gotta wash my broom! If that broom had 5 on the floor, I could have taken off on that cat poo*****
Yea.. I'm a complainin' ova heah. So then I say to myself "just take a sleeping pill and sleep through this funk".. but.. here I am.. ta daaaaaaaa wide awake but a little off kilter, so now I'm HERE, BORED, FUNKY, TOO rubberheaded to go anywhere, and still not sleeping. I just wanna kick the monitor right off the table (and I'm really trying not to throw things> I don't wanna go back to the kichen and be a good little kitchen ***** I'm done waking up to find someone snuck in here and committed a disaster area all over the counter for me to clean... So i took 2 more and topped them with a couple of tylenol pm. Yea..I'll just FLY THROUGH THE AIR to NJ and be back in time to iron Jon's clothes.
That's it.... still growling.. avoiding the little special areas where I know the treats are stashed cause even if it was a mistake, the scale said 228.3 and I don't want to give it up. Just a coke.. a coke.... 1 freakin' coke would settle me!
Gawd, I really hate this life..... I wanna get a new one. 
Still here... pain is worse, and the bayers are running low. I've definitely done some sport eating tonight.. nothing outrageous.. just some extra slices of turkey... an extra egg.. OH.. and evil... drank MILK.. 2% no less which is carb laden. I didn't pour it into a glass so I couldn't say how much.. but milk always seems to quiet the agita.. yanno? Hope I didn't overdo it... then I have something else to kick myself about.
My back and shoulders are simply SCREEEAMING! Gawd, I'm such a baby when it comes to pain.. one would think I'd be used to it, but after gaining some freedom, I simply don't want it! I'd kill for a qualude the size of a horse's ass right now.
JustBud
on 2/1/08 9:58 am - Houston, TX
on 2/1/08 9:58 am - Houston, TX
Lori:
Sorry to hear you had a pissy day. I would definitely tell the trainer when you are in his presence... he needs to be on his business. Especially if it happens repeatedly... I know your happy the scale is moving, a couple of posts ago you were upset... Tomorrow will be better! *Hugs*
-Bud
Eat to live, not live to eat!
Andrew's ok... I don't blame him for trying to be polite when cornered by a gym member.. although I wish the gym would post an etiquette list or something. I don't think tomorrow is gonna be much better unless the vicodin fairy leaves something under my pillow. Who knew salami could be this dangerous.
Most Active
Recent Topics
