I have been sadly mistaken...

So yesterday I went to the doctor to check my BP and thyroid.  I had already eaten lunch and had drank a lot of water for the day so I figured my weigh in would be higher than what weigh at home.  Before I broke the scale it was reading 289.  The doctor's scale read 307.  I had taken my shoes, belt, wallet and emptied my pockets too!  Well I didn't think too much of that because of the reasons I previously mentioned but this last couple of days I've been thinking that might scale might have been inaccurate this whole time. Today my employer had a health day so I went to get a body fat reading.  This was after eating a 320 calorie breakfast consisting of 2 breakfast scrambles and 20 ounces of water. I had to weigh with my shoes off so the scale could get an accurate body fat % reading but I still had my wallet and belt on.  I must say I'm shocked and appalled to say I have been wrong about my weight and I'm in much worse shape than I thought.  Right now I'm feeling rather overwhelmed and fat.  I have so far to go and I'm struggling so much with just trying to eat less right now that I feel like I'll never reach my goal.  I haven't even tried to factor in eating healthy much less tracking what I eat and the calorie content. My results: TANITA BODY COMPOSITION ANALYZER
TBF-310

BODY TYPE:  STANDARD
GENDER:     MALE
AGE:        28
HEIGHT:     5ft 7.0 in
WEIGHT:     305 lb
BMI:        47.8
BMR:        11,035 kJ, 2637 kcal
IMPEDANCE:  369 ohms
FAT%:       47.8%
FAT MASS:   146.0 lb
FFM:        159.0 lb
TBW:        116.51 lb

DESIRABLE RANGE
 FAT%:      8-20%
 FAT MASS:  14.0 - 39.51 lb I have another confession too.. I started the process of seeking WLS yesterday. This was prior to going to the doctor and finding out about my grievous mistake. I had already filled out the online forms with the WLS center and decided I should talk to the doctor about my plans while I was getting the check up.  He of course supports the decision but questioned whether I really wanted to do it because I had done so well at losing the weight. (I thought to myself.. Done so well???? Are you kidding me??) I can sit here and say I don't know if I'll go through with it or not but the truth of the matter is, if I have a chance..  I'll take it in a heart beat. I believe the WLS will help me by giving me enough time away from my vices that I can overcome then and learn new eating habits.  With the way I am doing it now I keep falling back into the same rut.  So many people have had long term success and have been able to overcome their eating problems. I can't argue with numbers.. especially when I'm one of the ones on the wrong side of the numbers.  I feel my mind is in the right place for this.  I know that nutritional balance  and exercise are the key factors and I'm ready to commit to those for the rest of my life. I need the tool to give me the restriction required to make those commitments permanent.  Now whether or not I am eligible and can have the surgery is a totally different story..

I'm assuming your BP and thyroid were O.K.  Are you looking into RNY or lapband?  Do you eat a lot of salty foods?  If so, especially like take out stuff, some of it is probably water weight.  That processed food also contains a ton of salt. Don't be so down on yourself.  You will get where you need to be.  Pray on it and see what you come up with.  I wish you the best no matter what path you choose. Brenda

Still waiting on the thyroid results.  BP was 130/86.  He was quite pleased with the BP.  I had taken myself all medications when I started the weight loss.  My thyroid was never too bad.. Just like 1 point over or something... Not sure how it's measured.   He didn't feel the need to put me back on the BP meds so I'm guessing the weight loss I had last year cured that.  Until I hit 330 lbs I had never had any issues with BP. I would like to do the RNY with the fobi pouch/band.

Ouch... That slap had to have hurt...

I have nothing but positive things to say about WLS, Chris.  If you feel it's your way to go, then go for it.  A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. 

Yeah it hurt a bit.  Think I'm kinda still in shock about it though.  I won't quit though.  I have to accept it for what it is and keep going..  If I give up, it only gets worse and I like myself at 305lbs much better than I did at 330lbs.  Besides I bet I'm really 299lbs without the clothes on. :)

You would be successful, kriz.  Do what you gotta and can do. Gotta go, lots more to say, though.  (((kriz)))

No reason to hide your journey into looking into WLS.  We're all here for you and wish you the best no matter what you decide.  Everyone is different and a lot of people on this board might be doing the same thing if they had insurance or if there insurance covered it.  My insurance doesn't cover it, so I have no choice but to lose on my own.

Sorry about your slap in the face.  On the other hand, maybe this is what you needed.  To make yourself accountable to find the solution  to your weight loss.  I know that doesn't help any, but you are on your way to a better you.  You need to stop looking into the past and start looking into the future more.  I've been working on this myself.  We can't fix what we have done already, so lets keep an eye on ourself for today! :)   

Kriz, whatever you decide to do, do not let the numbers own you. Regardless of whether your scale was inaccurate (my last one was 9lbs less than my docs, which is why I spent 2x what I did last time for a brand known for accuracy)...the fact is you still lost weight.  330-307. Now, I know the numbers feel smaller to you than 330-289.  But the numbers are in and of themselves an accomplishment.   Remember, we started at a similar weight and are close in height.  I started at 320 and am 5'6.   With that said, While the first 20 didn't break the 300 marker, 20 lbs made a real difference for me physically and emotionally.  Plus of the 150+lbs I want to lose 20lbs was more than 10% of my excess weight.  That means "do this 9 more times" and I'd have reached my goal.  Doesn't seem like a lot, does it.  And that 10%+ is a marker that DOES impact your health in positive ways. You did accomplish a lot.  It's all in how you look at it.

Those scales have a magical power.   

When the numbers say what we want them to say they can make us feel like we can conquer the Earth. Sadly, when the numbers are not so compliant we feel more like the scum of the Earth...

You felt good with how things were going.  Sure, the Drs scales are different and higher BUT that doesn't mean you haven't shown progress, that doesn't mean you can't lose weight.

YOU CAN DO IT!

If WLS is the path for you then take it.    Better to take that path and LIVE to tell about it than to stay obese and die with regret.  Think about how changing your life could turn your world around- I would never judge someone for aspiring to have that.

The true sucess is doing something to get the weight off. 

Let me know how your WLS plans develop!

Em

  

Chris...isn't it amazing what power that scale has over how we view ourselves?  It never ceases to amaze me how I can get on the scale one day, see a 2lb loss and feel on top of the world and like such a success and so positive....and 2lb in the other direction and I'm questioning myself and my self worth and feel like I will never get this weight off.  Our bodies are essentially the same with both readings, yet our feelings about ourselves and our self worth are at opposite ends of the spectrum! Don't give up...keep plugging along and making good food choices.  If you choose to pursue the WLS...nothing wrong with that...just another tool in this journey.  But keep on the positive track you've been on while you go down that path. I wish you success in any path you choose!!