Starting...

If you notice your patterns, you do best when you are aware.  Binges are very often about awareness and thinking about the choices we make.  I try to keep myself busy and find it easier to deal with food and I also try to have a plan before I eat anything.  I think about the food I am going to eat first.  You did that and moderated.  I'm not one to personally believe in good or bad foods b/c (well, for me anyway) that leads to some of my binges.  I'm a munchie person and usually the worst when I watch tv.  I'll overeat grapefruit when given the opportunity.  I've tried a few things with my trigger behaviors.  For example, when I watch tv sometimes I will sit on the floor.  For some reason I am not used to eating on the floor.  I also got an ABS ball (medicine ball with handles) and I will try to use that while I am watching tv.  I really try to no****ch too much so that I am not tempted but I do have to deal with the behavior.  Whenever I find a trigger, I try to find some way to distract from that trigger.  It takes the average person 30 days to break any given habit so if you can keep improve your trigger situations for a month you have a good shot at breaking through that trigger.  Then it's just a matter of maintaining the positive behavior. You've already got major things going for you and making changes you would have made with surgery to get it to work for you.  You're aware of your actions and taking steps to tackle your triggers.  Have you thought about taking a class at a local college or high school on your off time?  You could take photography (they have point and shoot classes now at most), drawing/painting, dance or jewelry making.  There's lots of hobby potential and would give you something to do on your off time when you're alone.

Not binging will be easy for me today and might be easy tomorrow as well. But as for Sunday...it'll be hell. It's like the first 2 days of anything is simple but then comes the 3rd day...and I'm like just in a different state of mind. So I am going to try and take it a day at a time. As for hobbies....tanning is my hobby lol. If I was to take a class...I would go back to school and finish for Cosmetology....I just need the money...as soon as I get some things paid off I will be working here 8-5 or 8-3 then going to school at night to get my license. Then when I am licensed....i will work here and at a salon build clients and when I have enough where I can manage just at the salon then BAM then after that open my own salon :)......totally off topic of weight loss.

Christa, try to give yourself a chance.  Sunday isn't here yet and you could surprise yourself.  It's exactly that-one day at a time.  One binge doesn't ruin all the progress that you've made-unless YOU let it.  You've got so many things to work towards and so much accomplished already b/c you have a plan to get to where you want to be.  Look at the plans you've made for your life.  Your working towards that goal and food is the same thing.  It's nice to dreams about getting to the finish line, but really there isn't a finish line.  Every day is new opportunity to excel.  Try to find the small successes in the days that you don't and look forward to doing it better the next day.

Hi Christa...

:hug:
I symphatize with you, about the binge eating. I would never go for lap band myself, but everyone makes his or her own decision based on good research (I assume)
It sucks that your insurance doesn't cover it!!!

I still have to find a way to do it myself, after the pregnancy. I wish we could do it together.
Are there no finance pay-off options for you to do LAP?
The liquid diet you are talking about, it might help, but do consider that it will be very hard to keep the weight off. I guess the only people *****ally succeed in losing weight for good, are the ones who do it slowly, by eating healhty and exercising...

Just to consider. The GOOD thing is that you are really thinking a lot about this and that you keep trying to get it right. Keep at it!!! Don't give up. Even if you screw one week up, go at it the next time. Maybe it will become a habit over time.
Maybe you should seek counselling or a support group about the binge eating (I am planning on doing this after giving birth, because I think getting my binges and head straight will be AS important as the exercise and healhty food...)

Anyway, just wanted to symphatize and wish you LUCK and STRENGTH
Carina

Christa -  you will do what you need to do - and like the others I will support you. But I implore you to give it one more try - Like Neecee and Shari said - try to get the binges under control.  Eat every 2 hours you are awake - just a couple hundred calories at a time.  Eat good grains and lean protiens...  see if you can find a way to overcome the binges. It has worked for me ****il yesterday - but that is a story for another message...)  and I belive that it can help you get your eating under control too. YOU are the one with the power in your relationship with food, no one else.

Hey Christa girl I have mixed emotions about your situation.  The lap band is certainly much less invasive or organ altering than gastric by-pass, but I just hate the idea of someone so young resorting to any type of bariatric surgery unless they have life threatening illnesses.  I think it’s much more important to get your head together than to have surgery.  We all know that a person can eat their way through gastric by-pass and regain every pound, so I would think that you could certainly do the same thing with the band.  As others have said, you are making some very positive lifestyle changes, so you are making progress.  I just think that finding a professional person to help you understand what’s holding you back from reaching all of your goals would be more beneficial than getting a tan.  Although I agree with Neecee – there are some therapists out there that are crazy as hell, there are also some very good ones.  If you could find one that has experience dealing with people with eating disorders, I think that would be fantastic. We will continue to support you no matter what you do, but I certainly cannot and do not get behind you going on some type of extended liquid diet.  Like Neecee also said, concentrate on a healthy, well-balanced diet, rather than resorting to starvation diets and pills.  Hang in there girl!!