Mom Gets Pre-Teen Daughter Lap Band

If only our minds could be our current age and our bodies that of a 12 year old! (well at least parts of it, i sure don't want to go through puberty again.)  Man that'd be nice to just go outside a little more and have the weight drop off!  Ahh well, guess we have to work harder at it now!

This is very sad and borderline child abuse -- maybe not the type that could actually be prosecuted, but nearly as bad in my eyes. The mom is both uneducated when it comes to health and flat out messed up. I feel for the girl though and of course I see myself in her. I struggled with my weight growing up and I know it is not easy. I also love how the mom seems to think she invented the phrase "red tape."

Yeah-- the "red tape" she mentioned is a series of procedural safeguards to insure the patient is safe and in the maximal possible health at the time of surgery. Makes a ****load of sense to try to circumvent that. JEEBIS! Taking your kid to Mexico to make your kid smaller because she embarasses you ranks way up there with the back-alley abortions of yesteryear. Sickening.

My probably not welcome opinion:

I was a fat teen. I know what it means to be a fat teen, and despite the cries of the younger generation-- it *is* easier today in at least one aspect: you wouldn't be the only one anymore.

While I do not have my own children, I have helped to raise 9 of them. Fortunately, none of them are obese, but then, they don't share my gene pool. I also work with kids exactly this girl's age all day long, and have for 17 years now: I'm not unaware of tweens or obesity. My belief is that if she has a medical disorder which causes excessive weight gain, treat it medically. If she has lifestyle issues because you keep crap in the house or are inactive, then get rid of the crap and get moving along with your daughter. But if after all is said and done, she is finding ways to eat around your plans,  if her poor choices are causing her obesity, get her psychological guidance--- but  then let her bear the natural consequences of her actions. I find too many parents these days, for whatever reason, want to fight their childrens' battles over even the smallest infractions-- which is causing some of the character breakdown we're witnessing as a society. If after your best laid plans, your child is *choosing* obesity, that's their choice. My mother kept scads of crap in the house. My parents were rarely home, and when they were, were very inactive. My mother is/was a compulsive eater who would hit and berate me as she gained, and tell me to go get my fat ass outside and move "or something." More than once she literally followed me in the car and screamed for me to "jog faster"(in front of my friends and neighbors.) But the truth is, I was a smart kid-- I knew what heatlhful living was, understood nutrition, paid attention in health class, and I *chose* the easier road-- a road of relative sloth-- because it was easier, because it fed my psychological hunger, and because I never learned to like physical activity-- (in part becauseI was mocked whenever I *attempted* it.) I preffered crappy food, when I had many other choices. I preferred sedentary activities to moving ones.  I made those choices, no one else.

Owning my obesity, so to speak, has made it possible to do something about it. If I was still sitting around tearing my hem about how badly I was treated as a child or the fact that my parents were less than stellar, I couldn't progress right now. It's not their fight-- it's mine. If they'd stepped up and tried to intervene surgically, not only wouldn't I have ever learned to take control of myself and my choices, I also would have missed many miles of difficult but ultimately useful road that helped me build REAL self esteem-- the kind they can't give you in a box-- the kind you create of your own mind, through your own accomplishments. I do understand as a parent wanting to do more-- but some of the work of growing up really just has to happen inside them. You give them what they need to survive and pray like hell thy learn to use it-- that's all any of us can do, really. This mother is clearly off her nut. Surgery aside, my daughter at 12 would not be walking around in skintight polyester knits with four pounds of raccoon eyeliner and triple processed blond ratty hair, either. And if she didn't like me for that, that would be okay-- I am not of the "my mom is my best buddy" school ****il MUCH later in life.) This girl needs a little guidance more than she needs this bull**** quick-fix minded mom who truly probably did these things NOT because she was fearful or concerned for her daughter so much as she was personally embarassed to be seen with her. And that's the part that chaps my ass the most, frankly.

Greatly welcomed and I wholeheartedly agree with you! No arguments from me!

This mother is clearly off her nut. Surgery aside, my daughter at 12 would not be walking around in skintight polyester knits with four pounds of raccoon eyeliner and triple processed blond ratty hair, either. And if she didn't like me for that, that would be okay-- I am not of the "my mom is my best buddy" school ****il MUCH later in life.) This girl needs a little guidance more than she needs this bull**** quick-fix minded mom who truly probably did these things NOT because she was fearful or concerned for her daughter so much as she was personally embarassed to be seen with her. And that's the part that chaps my ass the most, frankly. I've never seen so many parents who want to be pals with their kids!  I don't have children but I don't understand it!  I shudder to think what kind of person I would be today if my mother had had this mentality, especially now that she is no longer here. I feel you on the embarrassment too -- people who see them together are probably wondering why she allowed Brooke to get that way.  And she should feel some sense of responsibilty.  The girl is not buying the food that comes into the household.

Part of me feels for the girl.  As a person (not a teenager) she's 220 lb's and getting made fun of at school.  WLS was invented to help people like her.  So I think she's a candidate.  BUT...

She's twelve.  She needs to see a therapist about her over eating.  She needs to try to lose the weight the old fashioned way before resorting to WLS.  Why hasn't her mother helped her to do so?  Why are they so willing to medically handle her weight but so unwilling to physically handle her weight?  I think that because she hasn't tried the regular routine, that she's not a candidate for WLS.  She needs to learn a healthy life style.  She needs to learn why she over eats and address those matters; not fix it with surgery.  She hasn't given a true "try" and that's what I don't like.

I'm at work and don't have speakers here so I couldn't hear what the mother and girl were saying.  But, I am totally against someone her age having this type of procedure.  I think it's insane.  Among other things, her body is still growing and there's no telling what repercussions she will suffer from this surgery 5 - 10 years from now.  Rightly or wrongly, I am one of those people who blame the parent(s) whenever I see an obese child.  Once a child starts venturing out on there own a little and not so much under the control of the parent(s), then I can see how the parent(s) can lose control over what the child eats.  But, during those first 5-10 years when eating habits (good or bad) are formed, I hold the parent(s) accountable for terrible eating habits.  I agree with Shari about the make-up.  She's 12?  What the hell was she doing all made up like a hooker?

I don't think she is 12 in the video.  The first pictures they showed, yes.  But she looks like she's 14 or so when she's all dolled up.. Perhaps it's the makeup that makes her that way. 

Careful Cris - 14 will get you 20!  LOL