Feeling Out of Control !

OK so I have been lurking here for a long while. Then I joined. Then I replied to a post or two. Now I'm starting my own post. I'm nervous ! (stage fright.....) Anyway I was only like 7 pounds from my goal around March. I didn't think I would really get there but I was feeling SO good! I didn't really believe the scale was telling the truth but I was so happy. So then 5 pounds came back but I was OK with that. I still felt good and I wasn't out of control. Just added a little too much food back into my daily life I guess.

Now...3 more pounds, still not a big deal BUT I have been eating in secret, eating as soon as I get home whatever is in the cabinet not even tasting it well I could go on but you get the idea. I am so ashamed to even admit this online to stand in front of the fridge and eat whatever I see even though I'm not hungry and then try to eat normal in front of people. It hurts to admit that I do this. Its very humiliating. I just feel really low right now. Anyway thanks for listening. I'm just afraid I'm going to end up right back where I started.

Hi Bridget Sweetie there is no reason to ever feel nervous about posting here.  We are all dealing with the same or similar issues.  I read your profile and you seem to be very physically active and that will probably keep you from gaining too much weight for awhile.  But, you obviously are dealing with a lot more than hunger, at least physical hunger.  Have you considered seeking the help of a professional who can help you to figure out what is causing you to binge eat?  There is  no shame in what you are experiencing and no shame in seeking help for it either.  A trained counselor or therapist my be what you need to help you pinpoint what is going on inside your head. Whatever you decide to do, always know that you have a bunch of people here who are ready, willing and able to support you in any way we can.

You have accomplished so much. 70 pounds? That's incredible. I can tell you're very athletic. PLUS your picture is gorgeous, girl! I hope you are proud, every day, of what you've done.  That post might have been hard to write and publish, but the simple fact that you were able to speak up is a crucial step. The binge is a symptom of binge eating disorder, though not everyone who binges exhibits full-blown BED. I have a special place in my heart for binge eaters, because I am one. The best way to nip this kind of behavior in the bud is a) seek peer support (which you are doing right now) and b) seek professional therapy. This is not about being a terrible person who just needs to "snap out of it." It's not about willpower, because I'm sure you WANT to keep the weight off more than anything. You don't have to be a statistic on that front. NO ONE does, and you will absolutely beat this bump in the road if you want to. Binges are rarely, if ever, about hunger. The fear of gaining weight could be the sole reason for your struggles, or there could be several factors. Please, post here whenever you have the urge to overeat in secret. Or just post here whenever you feel like it, with whatever you're thinking. You are NOT alone. Binges do not currently rule my life like they used to, so, while I haven't lost 70 pounds YET, I do feel I have some perspective. You wouldnt believe the food I've eaten and what I've done to hide it! Feel free to PM me any time too. Therapy will help you understand why you do what you do, and peer support will keep you from ever feeling like no one gets it. EVERYONE here gets "it!"

I tend to eat when I get home from work too but I have been trying very hard to snack on raw vegetables with fat free dip and then grab my gym bag and head out the door before I do damage to the whole kitchen and cabinets (joking). No really the workout for me keeps me from not eating=grazing. I nibble just because mostly boredom but have really begun to make healthier choices and I hope that you can do......................

Hey Bridget,

Girl, you've got no reason to feel ashamed of yourself on this board.  I can't speak for others but it's behavior like that, that got me here. 

You'll get a grip on it soon enough, and you won't be able to keep up this behavior for much longer and you'll be fine.  Just stick with all the healthy things you're doing, and you'll grow out of this pattern soon enough.

Best of luck to you and if you need help, we're here for you.

Janina is right - no reason to feel ashamed here! We're not here to judge you, just support! The same behavior got me to where I am as well. Keep a journal of how you feel when you feel like binging or catch yourself doing it or the sneak eating. Work on keeping your mind occupied with something else - clean out your closet, start a load of laundry, organize your bathroom vanity, etc - anything to keep your mind off eating. I also get a BIG glass of cold water and down it as quickly as I can without getting brain freeze. This usually makes me feel full long enough to get started on a project to keep my mind off food.  You've come so far, don't get too hard on yourself right now. You are human and you are allowed to make mistakes -- but just refocus yourself and try again. Good luck!!!