Warning: VERY controversial question

I didn't read it as insulting.  I think both of you have the same point, it's an individual journey.

As usual, I'm with you, Bert. I think each can make the argument that what is working for them is best for them. I'm a big fan of doing what works for *YOU*, too....but permanently altering a healthy body is not a light matter nor should it be undertaken for less than serious reasons. The consequences of this surgery are life-long.  To allow someone to say that they wish to do this to look better alone, and say nothing, would be especially wrong to me-- most especially in a *support* forum. I care about people too much to stand idly by as people choose to do such things. Medical safety aside--I remember being 21... I remember acutely the hurt and the frustration-- the struggle between my body and my place in the world. I too wanted anything to make me smaller, if only so I could shop in a mall. But you really couldn't pay me anything for my journey now...I like who I am, and that struggle was part of how I got here. Skipping those struggles completely might deny  you the ability to build character, resolve, and other things you'll need one day. I don't regret it. I hope Christa finds some deeper peace with herself. I trust she will-- it just takes time.

I'm glad this thread got started.  It has  brought up alot of interesting and valid viewpoints.  It saddens me though when  the very personal issue of weightloss  whether  via surgery or any other method  gets turned into a  right or a wrong issue. Regardless of the method we are all striving for the same end result and however that happens for that person, is the right way for that individual. What's right for one may not be for another and what's wrong for one might not be for someone else. Even though my decision to have wls ended up being the right one for me, I do have so much respect  and admiration for the people who can  and do lose the weight through nonsurgical methods....because it is something that i wished I could've been successful at. .I fooled myself for years thinking that I could do it through nonsurgical methods until i just got very honest with myself one day and realized that i needed alot more help to do it. I needed  and still do need the forced behavior modifications of the wls.  That's a tough thing to admit.

You're not doomed, and you are not wrong. Some people can reduce their weight and keep it off. Unfortunately, the statistics aren't with dieters of any sort.  I have no reason to believe I'd be in the 5% that do exactly that. No one in my family-- the most genetically similar people I know-- has been able to do so-- and I'm related to smart, motivated people-- and I really don't believe there's anything in me in particular that makes me more able than they are. ________________ With lifestyle change and commitment, it CAN be done. If that's your choice and your journey, I wish you tremendous success....beat the odds!!! Some do--- be among them!

I respect everyone's POV on this issue no matter what it is. There is no issue on earth that everyone will agree on.   It was just a little over a week ago when I first started thinking about getting the Band.  But, after everything that I've learned since that time, WLS would be my very last resort.  I agree with those who say that overeating is more about what's rattling around in your head than what you're putting in your mouth.  We are all different and we each have to do what we think is in our best interest.  Shari said it best when she said that each of us should educate ourselves on all the relevant issues. We most examine all the pros and cons.  Once you've done that, then and only then can you make an informed decision.  We will never agree on every issue, and that's okay.  One person's reality is not necessarily the other person's. As far as I'm concerned, I'm going to do everything I can to lose the weight the old-fashioned way.  If, after I've given it my all, I'm still on the losing end of the battle, then and only then will I revisit the possibility of WLS.  And before I made that final decision I would plop my ample behind on the couch of a good psycho-therapist to deal with whatever demons may be hiding in my head and contributing to my overeating.   I appreciate everything that has been said so far on this thread.  I'm mystified as to why some are offended by opposing viewpoints.  Whether you've had the surgery, are thinking about having the surgery or have decided not to have the surgery, I would assume that you have made the decision that is best for you.  And, if that's the case, why would you be offended if someone has an opposing viewpoint and doesn't happen to agree with you.  Knowledge is power, and when you're talking about an issue such as this, there's no such thing as too much information.  Open and honest discussion is priceless.

Welcome Jean, I'm glad you made it over here too, and I'm delighted that  you're coming to terms with and looking on the bright side of your situation.  Good luck to you!!

Thank you for your post.  It was very well written and I think that you got what I was aiming for when I posted it. Everyone is different, there is no set formula to lose weight, get healthy or change ones lifestyle.  It is as different for me as it is for ten people that come behind me.  That is one of the reasons why when people ask me "tell me EXACTLY what you eat and exactly what you did to lose weight" I am speechless.  I can't begin to tell someone the emotions that I have struggled with and conquered, nor the journey that I have undertaken.  It's all individual. Thank you again!

Lol, are you a novelist?  I haven't seen anyone on this site write like you. Not a bad thing. I'm often long winded myself. In fact, I'm kinda known for it.   Kudos for you for joining in. I didn't find your original post offensive and I understood what you were trying to say.

Paul, I am sorry you were offended by my post.  I believe you missed the actual question which was "when faced with the inability to have WLS for an undetermined amount of time, if ever and for whatever reason, why wouldn't someone take their life into their own hands and lose the weight instead of embarking on an endless fight with the insurance company."  (paraphrased) I didn't make reference to my success or weight or any specifics about what I did to adopt a healthier lifestyle so I do not believe I was encouraging anyone to do what I did, or professing to have all the answers.  I have been a member of OH for two years now and beleive it or not, the post ops on here have been incredibly helpful in my journey.  I do not believe that I am in violation of any of the TOS and if I am I am sure a moderator will point that out to me.  if I had posted this on the Main Board I might have to agree with you that I was looking to muddy the waters.  However, everyone on this board who knows me knows that isn't the case. Congratulations on your success.  Any of us who have struggled with obesity would surely cheer for anyone who has been successful in taking back their lives, regardless of how they achieved this.