Venting....

Ok, here I go. I'm just going to vent everything, because I feel it will make me feel a hell of alot better. Because here I feel I can tell everything, I can't talk to anyone about this stuff except here. So...ALL last week and so far this week has been horrible. I have totally thrown my dieting tactics off. I haven't exercised and I am eating EVERYTHING, litterally! It's almost TOM any day now, so that is why I have been binging like a crazy person. So as soon as that day comes my hunger cravings go away...in an instant...odd huh. It's kind of like totally uncontrolable. I mean really I can not fight the cravings off for nothing. So I haven't stepped on the scales since my 5 pound loss. I am scared too. I don't want to see my damage. But this Saturday I will step on them, regardless because I have to face the facts and get back on track.  This weekend was Memorial weekend and I ended up watching the Super Regionals on ESPN for softball. I used to when I was younger and I always would tell my dad that I would play at the University of Arizona with Mike Candrea as the coach and he would choose me to play on his Olympic USA team. Ok as you can see that sure as hell didn't happen. Because I let myself get fat my senior year I was on a good way my junior year I had college scouts and I just threw it away. So I was basically devastated the whole weekend because I want to play. Well I decided damnit I'm going to play again. Next summer on a 23U fastpitch league. There is also a National Pro Softball team out of Michigan I might try out for, for next season.  Trust me...if I can get back in shape and train not being conceited or anything but I'm pro material lol. :) Anyways that is my main goal for Fall to try out for a team to play again, because it is all I can think about.  Oh so all week I have been feeling like blah. And today I was on my way out the door from work to go get some subway and 2 of the workers were clocking in. I was standing there and for the first time....the FIRST time anyone has noticed my weight loss. The guy says..wow you've lost weight. He's like ok quit your job and come live with me and take my last name...(he's old enough to be my father) I laughed and said thanks. I was ecstatic. That made my day right there. I mean someone noticed! OMG! So that just triggered my brain...Hello wtf are you doing to your body! Start exercising again you freaking fool! Geez. So I think I am gonna get my butt back on track. Ugh thatnks for letting me vent. Sorry  I rambled I just had to let EVERYTHING out. I love this board!!!

 Congrats on the notice.....that makes it a good day, huh?  And a day to re-focus.  You can do it.  Sorry about the blahs but this too shall pass.  I'm so thankful that I had a hysterectomy 10 yrs ago.  Besides having my kids it was the best thing I ever done, and I sure don't miss TOM.!!!!!!

So I was thinking about buy this game for the PS2 "Dance Dance Revolution" it counts the calories you burn. And plus i love the game. :) So I might....I will just have to keep it at my parents house because I am pretty sure the people that live below me wont appreciate the game as much as me...if you have never played the game...its a really fun work out!!! :)

I DL all the DDR techno mixes and use them during my pool workouts! WOOT!

Haha. Awesome! The first time I played it was on New Year's Eve. And I have wanted it ever since, and I am sitting here at work and decided hummm maybe I will buy it today. 

 My daughter's ex bought it for her for her b-day, she lost 15 lbs. while doing it, but when they broke up she sold it at a second hand game store.  I told her she was crazy.

Yea you can burn some calories on that game!!! Hmm I never thought about a second hand game store, like a pawn shop I'm gonna have to search it out and see if maybe I can get it for cheaper....hmm Thanks Angie for the wonderful idea! :)

Check your area for a gamestop or an eb  games.  Otherwise you can go to blockbuster or hollywood video. they also have similar game shops inside of them.

I'm right there with ya Christa.  Come on girl we can do this.  For the last 5 days I have been little Miss Piggy.  I feel like crapola.  I wanted to weigh on the first and post some big numbers and now I'm afraid.  Ok I will weigh on Friday and share the news good or bad and you do the same on Saturday.  I went for a 5 mile walk this morning but my hands and feet are all swollen and fat looking from my 5 days of bad eating.  Hello, I went to Wendys last night.  Can you say FROSTY.  Girl you are a doll.  Be careful out there with all those fellas.  I think I was invisible for so many years that when men look at me I instinctively turn my head away from them.  The only reason they ever looked at me was because of my fat.  Now I think or I at least hope that some of them look because they like what they see.  I was called a baby doll last night by some guy in a car next to me.  Me a baby doll?  Ok!  Thanks for sharing.  It makes me feel like I'm not alone in my struggles.  No matter what the scale says we know what we need to do.  Have a good day and let's finish this week off nice and strong. 

Thank you!!! 5 mile walk...ugh I wish.  Maybe 2 miles is the most I can do, I just get bored when I walk and I am always like man this is so boring!!! So that is why I am opting to buy the DDR so I can dance!!! :) And I will still walk. But Dancing is fun. And lately I have been pitching in the back yard at my parents and hitting the softball around so I can slowly train on that again. So that has some work out in it. Yes we can do it. You're an inspiration. And we will both see what those scales say at the end of the week and we will just keep on kickin!!! :)