K, have U been self-righteous about your weight loss?

We recently bashed on family members..but are YOU guilty of somehow trying to control others on their own personal weight issues? I am. On Mother's Day, of all days, I mentioned to my younger daughter that she "should" make better choices in her diet.   SHOULD - the first clue that I was in her stuff! I would say I was trying to gently point out that she puts on weight like I do - all in our upper body and with heart disease in our family, it's time to think about doing better. Angie's post about her daughter ordering the mondo-grilled cheese and fires...that is so much my DD.  She drinks bunches of full sug soda, eats eggs/taters for breakfast, then goes out to Kentucky Fried for lunch. I mean OUCH. She works at a restaurant and eats stuff like mozz sticks and fries for her supper.  She is still carrying baby weight, my GS is getting onto 2 years old, and his mommy is getting bigger. I feel such shame about saying that to her, but on the othet hand, i am her mom - how can I act like it's all good????

As you pointed out, I AM.....LOL!!!  But just with my daughter, oh and my mother.  Nevermind.  Guilty as charged.  I justify it by I am concerned with their health.  AND I am a b***h when it comes to my mom, but it is life or death in her case.  And as I have already discovered from various hospital stays and the preceding weeks after she comes home.....when she gets to the point that she is unable to care for herself, my sisters are going to be MIA.  This last time when I brought her home, I called my sister and asked "what are you feeding mom and dad for supper tonight?"  She said "we were going to have pizza", to which I replied, "she can't eat pizza."  To make a long story short, when she asked what she could have, I gave her a list of things mom could eat and told her if she couldn't bother to make it to the hospital the least she could do is make sure they had a good nutritious meal when they got home.  AND Then DH gave me a great big hug for finally standing up and saying something to them.  She's their mom too!

oh yeah...cringe again...I DO rag on my mom once in a while, too.  She buys those hostess donuts - in the box at the store and has them most days for brekfast. With her coffee that has at least 3 tsp sugar in it! Plus whole milk.

My children are young enough (9, 7, 5, and 19months) that it's still my responsibility to direct their food choices.  "No, you can't have a cookie for breakfast.  No, you can't leave all your vegetables and still have ice cream for dessert afterwards."  Sometimes they will say, after only having picked at their food, Can I be done?  The reply? "Yes, but no dessert."   Often they will say, "That's OK, I'm just full."  I like it when they do this because to me it means they are still listening to their tummies and only eating what they need instead of eating it all just because it is in front of them.  We usually wrap it up and put it in the fridge so that if they come back half an hour later and say I'm hungry, we can reheat it and give it to them.  I am trying so hard not to pass my food neuroses on to my children--especially my daughters.  So far so good as far as I can tell.  My 9 year old daughter weighs 60 pounds; I weighed 90 at her age.  I was 7 when I got really chubby, so I am still waiting to see how things go for my 5 year old at that age.  My 7 year old son is  tall and lanky,  He doesn't even care too much for candy and stuff, so I'm not too worried about him.  My girls on the other hand love it.  I just make sure they eat healthy stuff first.  Occasionally I will say, "I think you've had enough of that (candy). If you're that hungry you need to eat more _____lunch, dinner, a healthy snack, etc.  We don't even buy candy; we get it given to us all the time it seems.   I did ONE time tell my older brother that eating half a pound of cheese for supper was not very good for him.  That was nearly a year ago when we lived with them for 8 weeks.  I wasn't mean and nasty about it.  His weight doesn't matter to me.  I was just concerned for his health, if he did this very often. He just laughed it off.   Last Friday he went to give blood and was declined because his blood pressure was too high.  160 over 120.  He's going to have to make changes of some kind, but it won't be me telling him this time.

I haven't lost enough weight yet to be entitled to self-righteousness, but I have hinted to my mom that her habit of losing a hundred pounds on Optifast and then eating 3 whole bags of Hershey's Nuggets in a sitting *daily* is probably not the best model of health. I'm trying to remember that all fat people come to their own conclusions, and those who wish to lose weight do so in their own time, and not on *my* schedule. If someone asks what works for me, I might share that-- but otherwise I feel it's my duty to keep my yap shut-- I couldn't listen when I was in their shoes, either.

I don't make any comments (outside this or other weight loss forums) *now*, relying on the fact that when I get to goal and have lost more than 300 pounds, I will be an expert and feel free to comment with abandon!

Oh yeah, totally self-righteous.  Just yesterday my sister was telling me that she is at her highest weight.  I took it upon myself to calculate her BMI. LOL  I told her how to eat, what she needed to do, and that she could do it!!! RAH RAH RAH!! Of course I followed up with "Isn't it ironic that a former 350 pound person would give you tips on weight loss?"   She knows that I wasn't preaching, merely helping, but we got a good laugh out of it. I am CONSTANTLY trying to help my 14 and 17 year old sons.  But after a talk with their doctor I was told that they were old enough and smart enough to know what they needed to do, and that their destiny had to be their own. Now, my SO asked me for help.  Yeeee haaaaaaaaaa!  I took that bull by the horns, lasted all of a week and he was asking me to bake him a cake!! LOL No wonder I fall off the dang wagon with all these gluttons I live with.

I don't know that we are self-righteous, just that we know where we came from and we pray never to see one of our loved ones in the same spot. But yeah, I'm guilty!!!

I am definitely guilty of this one and I feel horrible - because I did it to my 4-year-old daughter! OMG!!  She must be going through a growth spurt I think, but lately, she wants to eat EVERYTHING in the house. She will eat breakfast and come to me in about 20 minutes and say, I'm still hungry, can I have a snack? I snapped at her and said, "you don't need to eat all the time, you don't want to get fat like me!"  I felt horrible because she hasn't even gained any weight! She's still 40 lbs like she has been for about 8 months now. My 9-year-old son is a bit overweight, but it's because when he's at my ex's - he lets him have M&M's for breakfast!!!! I would love to kick his sorry butt for that!!!!

But, the last time I was at the grocery store, I made sure my kiddos have good snacks and I'm very lucky because my kids would rather eat a cut-up apple over candy. If they want to eat, I let them eat, but its something good like fruit or yogurt. It's so hard growing up overweight. In h.s., I weighed what my goal weight is now, but  I thought I was huge and I was made fun of be because I had DD boobs at 12! A lot of the girls I went to high school with were size 0 - I was a size 8. I wasn't overweight - I was at the higher end of "normal" but still got called "thunder thighs" or "blubber butt" and it hurt. I just want to save my kids from that heart ache.

Your H.S story reminded me of what my youngest daughter is going through.  She weighs ~128, is very muscular and athlectic, runs the track while I walk it, eats healthy nutritious meals and snacks, her one vice is mountain dew.  The kids at school rag her and tease her all the time because she is not a size 4.  While eating her salad fo lunch the other day, a young man came up and threw a "lite" salad dressing on her table and told her "you better eat this kind."  Of course she held it together at school and cried like a baby when she got home.  Now, this is a young lady who could whip about 2/3's of her clasmates butts, including the boys, and her dad's solution was....Kick their @ss. I'm trying hard to teach her that just because she is strong and tough does not give her the license to use those abilities except in extreme cases (you all know what I mean), but she is her dad's only little tomboy. Now she doesn't want to eat breakfast and/or lunch because she thinks she needs to lose weight.  I'll post her pic when I figure out how and you can judge for yourself.  I know it's just kids but sometimes it makes me sooooooo mad.

That makes me so mad for her!! OMG kids can be so damn mean! I don't know what her plans are after high school - but I hope she realizes there is such a big world out there after school!!! I wished somebody would have told me that when I was growing up!!!!  These kids really aren't going to matter to her even 5 years down the road after she graduates. Heck, I can only remember my true friends' names from high school and I've only been out 10 years.