something funny for you...

Chris' crazy questions got me thinking about this that I found, very funny.... Actual Annoucements Taken From U.S. Church Bulletins: 1.Don't let worry kill you, let the church help. 2.Thursday night-potluck supper. Prayer and meditation to follow. 3.Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. 4.For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery down stairs. 5.Weigh****chers will meet at 7pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double doors at side entrance. 6.The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 & 11. 7.8 new chior robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several members and the deterioation of some older ones. Chior invites any member of the congregation who enjoy sinning to join. .Boy Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. 10.The Lutheran Mens Group will meet at 6pm. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a small feel. 11.Associate minister unveild the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday. "I uped my plege--up yours." 12.The rose bud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Allen Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julian Belzer. 13.This afternoon there will be a meeting in the N and S ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends. 14.Tuesday at 4pm there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk please come early. 15.Wednesday, The Ladies Liturgy Society will meet. Mrs. Jones will be singing "Put me in my little bed", accompanied by the pastor. 16.Thursday at 5pm there will be a meeting of The Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become little mothers, please see the minister in his private study. 17.This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the alter. 18.The service will close today with "Little drops of Rain". One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in. 19.Next Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet, please come forward and get a paper. 20.The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement Friday evening. 21.A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall,  music to follow. 22.At the evening service tonight the sermon topic will be "What is Hell"? Come early and listen to our chior practice. Candy

heheh those are cute! 5.Weigh****chers will meet at 7pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double doors at side entrance. That one was my favorite!

 FUNNY!!!!!