10/4/05 Mehta Bariatric Center Support Group

Confused, alone and overwhelmed at the thought of Weight Loss Surgery? Do you worry that people will think you are taking "the easy way out"? Do you fear weight loss failure.. again? Or do you simply feel you need help, advice, guidance and support from others who understand what it's like to be morbidly obese? Why do I feel "head hunger" even when I know that my stomach is already full? How do I deal with this emotional eating? How should I respond to people who make stupid or mean comments or ask rude questions? Am I losing as much weight as I should be? Why did my weight loss stop or slow? How can I get past plateaus and keep on losing? If you can relate to any of these questions...Please Join Us...Open to everyone ***Mehta Bariatric Center Support Group*** EAST BRUNSWICK HILTON 3 Tower Center Blvd. East Brunswick, NJ Tuesday, October 4, 2005 Tuesday, November 1, 2005 7:00 - 9:00 pm Hope to see you there!!! ~Kristin

Kristin, I cannot join the Mehta Bariatric Center Support Group due to a shoulder injury But I wanted to share something I wrote before my WLS. I don't know if this will help pre-ops at your group...but I did want to share Re: My feelings about those who feel that WLS is the "EASY WAY OUT". ******************************************************** To My WL Family, In reading over all of the posts every morning I can't help to be so proud and blessed to have had the opportunity to be involved with and be supported by, such a courageous, beautiful and compasionate group of people. I become very upset when I hear people say that WLS is the "EASY WAY OUT", or "USE A LITTLE WILL POWER, YOU'LL LOSE THE WEIGHT". Do they not think that we have tried to do this in MANY other ways? It's not as if we have the surgery and then the "WL Fairy" waves a magic wand and the pounds come off while we just sit around doing nothing. Do these people think that one morning we woke up and said, "I THINK THAT I WANT TO BE A FOOD ADDICT" and then we proceeded to to eat and see how much we could gain, because we all love carrying 200 to 400 or more pounds around everyday? That we also enjoy not being able to walk and take part in the activities with our family...husbands, children, grandchildren, parents and friends? Do they also think that we love all of the ailments that come along with obesity??? That we all sat around one day and said, "I will eat more today so I will develope more problems and it will kill me. YEAH, this is fun... This is not a game, it is our lives and I know if there was another way of doing this, I would have done it 50 years ago. Oh, I could lose a little but when I gained it back I weighed more than I did when I started the diet. I did every diet on the planet and some that I made up. I can't help to think about that beautiful and profound Indian saying, before you judge me..."WALK A MILE IN MY SHOES". I want to thank my "Higher Power" for blessing me with a family and some friends that are very supportive of me having this surgery, but some others have not been, they have offered their unsolicited advice. For them, I say, "Don't insult my intelligence, my decision to have surgery has not been made without a great deal of thought, research, education and prayer". I also add that they are entitled to their opinion but please respect my decision...you don't have to agree with it, but respect it. The infamous question I get from some people is..."AREN'T YOU SCARED"? YES, I'M SCARED!!! I was also scared of spinal surgery to remove 4 herniated dics, gallbladder surgery, arm and hand surgery for nerve damage, surgery for endometreosis and 3 heart attacks, and asthmatic attacks. Being morbidly obese is "no day at the beach" either. So yes, some days I am scared! I am trying to keep a positive attitude and hope and pray that when my insurance approves coverage for surgery, (oh yea, jumping through these hoops is a barrell of fun also, I'd really want to do this if I didn't feel the need) that my "Higher Power" will guide the hands of my surgical team and all those caring for me to have a successful, non-eventful surgery and recovery. I ask that for all of you that disagree with your loved ones having surgery, to try and remember how hard it is on those of us living the way we are now, and that the bottom line is that, "DEATH IS NO STRANGER TO THOSE *****MAIN OBESE". WLS needs to be our decision, and for me it was the last resort I can't go on existing rather than living...I have left my house about 10 times in the last 14 months, why? Because I physically can't without great pain. I hope I don't sound like I am complaining, I guess I just needed to vent a bit...please just bear with me and pray for me that I am approved for surgery soon. Thank you all for being there for me. To all that are having surgery, you are in my thoughts and prayers. For those that have already had surgery, keep up the good work, and believe me I know it must be work!! THIS IS NOT "THE EASY WAY OUT"... but for some it is the last hope and the only way. ******************************************************* I have since had RNY Lap Surgery on May 17, 2005 and as of my last visit to my surgeon on August 25th, I have lost 82 pounds. Since then my scale reads another 9 1/2 lbs gone. I feel healthier and I am looking forward to losing more and feeling even healthier. I was 61 Yrs. old at the time of my surgery and an extremely HIGH RISK patient. My only regret is that I did not have this surgery sooner. SURGEON: *DR. ALEXANDER ABKIN (MY HERO...GAVE ME ANOTHER CHANCE FOR A HAPPIER AND HEALTHIER LIFE) *FLORHAM PARK, NEW JERSEY Please feel free to email me at: [email protected] Big Hugs to all, Fran (From Jersey)