PARANOIA....Can you help??

Ok all, So I am paranoid. Everytime I eat, I think I have ruined EVERYTHING! It's like, no matter what I eat, no matter how nutritionally sound...i get up the next morning, or later on, and think all the fat is back! Or somehow it's all going to stop. I know it's from years of disappointment in the weight loss department, but this is really working. I had my surgery on June 13th. Monday was 11 weeks and I am down 61 pounds. I look great, if I do say so myself! HA!! But I keep having these thoughts. Am I alone here? How does anyone combat that? I keep my "eye on the prize" so to speak, so it doesn't get out of hand or anything. But I have to tell you, I feel fat in the morning sometimes. Ugh..I am rambling. I guess a little pepper-upper is what I need..any ideas? Rossana 334/273

I'm 2 years out and my brain is still in fat mode. Every time I get on that scale I peek with one eye closed. So you're not alone . . . You're doing great! Keep it up!!

I know you are not laughing but this topic is to funny. Relax. If you want someone to talk to hit me up via e-mail.

Hi Rossana ! Dont weigh yourself unless you have to.. seriously.. literally lose your scale if you can.. give it to a neighbor and arrainge once a week or every other week **visitations* (but only if your scale behaves itself !!). Focus on Day by day... embrace the changes... when you lose a size in clothing or can do *something* physically (sit in chairs, drive a car easier, whatever**) better.. find something to reward yourself with. Maybe a spa treatment? Or a movie with a gal pal? Something that means something enjoyable for YOU.... you deserve a break today.. : ) Use POSITIVE reinforcement with yourself... you need to remind yourself and your brain the TRUTH of your situation.. that your doing *great* and making fantastic progress !! Rossana.. my comments about losing the scale is because... really.. I know more people who struggle with depression, and despondency that have WLS because they weigh *daily*. Me? I dont have that problem simply because I cannot weigh on a normal scale.. beauty eh? Weighing .. the weight loss itself is an ebb and FLOW.. sometimes its slow or non existant.. other times the weigh just FLOWS off you.. and its an emotional rollercoaster the more a person weighs themselves. Thats my feeling and opinion. Without weighing.. if your doing all you know and doing the best you can.. protein, water, vitamins, exercise.. and staying healthy emotionally by being active (taking walks.. visiting on the phone with friends... getting OUT of the house when you can.. of course lots of social and fun NJ board....posting here).. If your doing good things.. then its easier to focus on ONE day at a time if our not constantly having to weigh yourself : ) Otherwise.. post here *alot*. Help me and others get this board a *hopping** so we have our own daily support and encouragement place? Surround yourself with sincere people, if they can offer you a word of encouragement thats an added plus : ) Your doing EXCELLENT ! Tell yourself good things, and make a point to have a weekly reward for reaching small, daily goals. Each day is a new day, and an adventure. Posting here on the New Jersey board allows people to come along side of you and cheer you up.. (*rah rah* : ) AND other people are encouraged and dont feel so alone when others like yourself post and share their journey. Me? This week has been HELLISH with homework up the wazzoo.. and then finally a Final exam last night.... buzzzzzzzz....(Contrast and Compare the criminal justice and policing of Nazi Germany with the Prussian Regime under King Frederic..... ENOUGH !) AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH ! yabida yabida.... Whew. **Flashback there.. ... Large dogs.. landing.. on.. my.... ** X14 Space Modulators... wwwwwwrrrrrrr *click*. *arches back , snaps head to size.. adusts self... *THERE*> ALLllllllllllllllllllllll better now. Really. Yep. Self correcting Redneck mechanism always kicks in. Im FINE folks... really : ) Seriously, be encouraged. Rossana.. this disease.. obesity is one that causes us to isolate, and not get OUT and among people. I have mild light affective disorder, which gets me down sometimes, in fact I am going to go get in my little Subaru with the sunroof open and drive... just because it seems like something to do. Right now. Friday.. 132pm eastern time. I have to go get my books anyway from Monmouth, and pay for postage for my final original to get to the university.... THEN.. woo woo I get to meet new people Tonight at the Toms River Support group. Rossana.. can you come? Hummmmm? Can you can you? Be there Be square... anyone who is *anyone* (and who lives close enough) is gonna be there... The Jenster... Jenn i fer is gonna be there.. as is Nannette, and Jack.. and Timmy Ray... and probably about 12 other peoples : ))) Tonight Toms River Community Hospital Auditorium A 7pm Have a super day Rossana.. and know your not alone. I just hide *my* paranoia in plain sight in and among my wild redneck rambling : ) Take care Hugs Timmy Ray PS How I combat the paranoia is simple... try to be upbeat.... gregarioius... social and off the wall and try to make people smile... share when I am down... be genuine and true to yourself... and on days when you feel (figuratively speaking) like your dog died, everyone hates you and you just realized you have velcro stuck in your perm.... on THOSE days you come to the board and VENT.. and share about your lousy.. no good mixed up confused unfullfilling screwy LIFE.... and then everyone else goes.. **OH... so Timmy has bad days too.... Im not the only one**. Luckily not too many of my days are like that (but velcro in the hair... tell me short of high voltage electricity or buxom servant girls to remove it.. how does one remove it?) Hope I made you smile or at least wonder what medications IM on : ) Have a good one Timmy Ray : )b (insert innocent "Redneck grin --------> x

Hey there.. Make no mistake about it, I don't weigh myself everyday..not even nearly. I go up the corner to my doctor's office about once a week or so. That is my pc and he is very supportive of this surgery, so he lets me pop in an out as I see fit. I will probably not go this week, since next week is my 3 month anniversary. I'll wait till then to get a good surprise! And listen, I wouldn't ever wonder about your mental state. I have been known to be a little bit off the wall and back again! I am a musician..you know us creative-artistic types walk to the beat of our own drum, so to speak!! I enjoy your humor, and look forward to your postings and your quick wit! I would have loved to come out to the support group meeting out there, but it is a bit out of the way for me. I am in North Jersey, and coming that direction from June to September is a bust on a Friday night. With the traffic going south, I would need to go to the anger management support group instead! So, perhaps as the year unfolds we'll venture on down there. Thanks much for the invite!! Talk again soon, Rossana

Rossana: I get too frustrated weighing myself more than once per week. I don't see enough movement in the scale with daily weigh-ins and I get mad (or depressed) so it isn't worth it. By waiting a week I can see enough of a weight loss to feel successful vs like I'm failing with daily weigh-ins. It's all a "mind game". PS: St. Barnabas runs a great support group at the Ambulatory Care Center in Livingston which I think is fairly close to you. If you are interested, the next meeting (for patients less than 1 year) is on Wed - 10/5 @ 6:00pm. They have a separate meeting for patients over 1 year on the 2nd Wed of the month. Good luck - KATWOMAN

Honestly, I think your feelings are normal and perhaps justified. I know for myself, it was part of the whole process. For years I bargained, begged, pleaded, cried, yelled, screamed and carried on about my weight loss failures. I mostly gave up. For many of us, this is the first time in our lives that we've been able to sustain a weight loss. We start thinking - conciously or subconciously - "can this really be FOR REAL??!?!?!". We can't believe it, and to "shield" ourself from the devastation we "expect" to experience at any minute we start this negativity and paranoia. As morbidly obese people we often condition ourselves to expect failure. Don't worry. It'll pass. Just keep busy with the things that YOU have control over - protein, water, exercise. irene