3.5 years out and GAINING - HELP PLEASE

I'm 3.5 years out from RNY - i was doing really well - then 20 months after RNY i had a breast lift (no working out for 3 months) -- then april 2007 i had a tummy tuck.  My boobs are that of a teen girl and my stomach is unbelievable - flat like I've never been in my whole life - both surgeries proved fabulous. In my heart and mind I am very VERY grateful for all that I have received since the surgery - but my actions prove otherwise.  The 2 plastic surgeries have put me out of gym commission for 3 months each.  I know most think I'm making excuses - but sitting around - it did nothing but push me back to my old horrible habits. I'm not sure where to start or re-start that is without feeling like i have 150lbs to lose again - that i can accept the fact that i have 25 to lose.  I'm feeling really overwhelmed - i feel like i've disappointed so many friends and family.  I feel like the weight gain is a no-win situation and that I'm only going to keep gaining - all old thoughts - just horrible.     Anyone's been where I am now...and doing better? PLEASE - any assistance would be most welcome. Susan :)

Susan,   Im not in your shoes but can feel your pain. Im planning on having the same surgery's with-in the next 6-8 months. I think you should speak with your doctor again and try to get back on track. You worked so hard to lose it and so easy to gain. STOP and 25, your not a looser you just had a set back.I thin that is normal for many people. Get back to the gym and get on track ASAP....You can do it, I have confidence in you...Best of luck honey....

what is wrong with you. 25 pounds would make you give up the pounds you have lost so far. Get back on track now. don't plan a date do it now. We all need a pick me up sometimes. I know I do. You will be okay. Just a monetary setback. Don't waste all of you time, pain and money on feeling sorry for yourself. Start getting rid of those pounds and hit the gym today. Keep me posted.

I'm 3 years out.  Haven't had any PS yet.  But I have experienced the up and down cycling of weight fluctuation/small gains.  For me, the panic is the WORST part of it all.  It leaves me feeling hopeless and paralyzed.  The only thing that helps to break that feeling is to do something - anything!!! Simply accepting that I'm in a bad phase goes a long way to ending the panic.  It's not the end of the world AND there's STILL SOMETHING I can do - 1) Become aware of and STOP the mindless compulsive eating... 2) GO FOR A WALK.  Get out of the house, and most especially out of the kitchen. Just those 2 simple things will often get me back on track. I'd also encourage you to find and attend a support group meeting - FORCE yourself if needed... It is so important to reconnect with people that are in the same wls boat... Irene

Susan, I don't know in Jersey where you are but there is a fabulous support group for woman in Haddonfield  It is an intensive group of about 6 woman who are at least 9 months post op.  They come from all over South Jersey   I attended the last group that she had and I must say I came away with a lot.  It is great that you have gotten so far in your journey.  It is also great that you are catching yourself before it gets out of hand.  There is also a group on line for people who need to need to get back on track.  Here is the link: http://www.wlscenter.com/NLArchive/sept_1_2007.htm  You have been sucessful and you know what you have to do.  There are a lot of us out here pulling for you as there may come a day we will be in the same boat.   Good luck. Jeanne

Jeanne the group in haddonfield -- does it cost anything? do you have to sign up for it? does it have open attendance??  thanks for any info  hugs to you roberta

Hi Roberta: Yes it is $180.00 if you pre-register.  It is for 6 session usually 2 weeks apart in the early evening.  Jim was the guest nutrionist at one of my sessions.  As I was the only PA hospot grad. I knew he was good.  He blew the others away.  There were so many questions that I wondered if these people had any pre-op lessons or perhaps because most were 15 months or more post op they might have forgotten.  The session was worth every penny.   We discussed everythng from exercise, bad habits, dating, sex.  It all got covered. I recommend it to any one who can afford it.  It is part of the program that is pro-mode by PA hopot. called my self design.  Hope that answers your question.  If you want the phone number I can PM it to you. Jeanne

Susan As someone who has recently gotten my surgery date, I can't claim to know anything about where you're at, but 25 lbs. is a set back, you need to reclaim your dedication to being the healthiest person you want and can be, if you can't do the gym, fine, then walk, ride a bicycle or some such activity as to keep you feeling like you are on track, the rest has been said by others and I'm now experiencing my own anxiety and fears about succeeding and keeping the weight off once I get there (lol), heck, just the process leading up to getting my date has caused me enough stress to gain some weight, though my clothes still fit and I'm hoping to drop it before my PATs.  

I wish you success in getting back on track!

You are not a failure, you are human.  You got this far and made many good decisions in the past regarding your health.  You need to take a fresh start and look at it as a beginning.  You have 25 lbs to lose, not a 150.  Make small changes to your diet.  If you are snacking at night, get rid of those snacks.  If you are drinking soda, dump it, etc.   A few dollars lost is a few pounds lost too.  Write down what you are eating daily so you have a clear picture of what you are eating.  Cutting just 500 cals a day will let you lose 1 to 2lbs a week.  I am not sure where you are at in calories, but any amount would help you.  Take small steps and think positive.  It you overwhelm yourself with the thoughts of dread, failing and having to climb that huge mountain, you will never begin.  You obviously realize your mistakes, now take charge of it and do what you did before - take control.  You can do it, you already have.  No one said this was the easy ticket out, it is a tool to help you.  Go for it.  You can do it!!!!  This post was your first step now keep up the momentum.

Good luck.

Well said!!!