Pre-Surgery Doubts and Nerves

Hi All, Well I'm finally in the month of my surgery - my date is 5/30/06. Up till now, I've not had any nerves or doubts regarding surgery...but now I do. I'm scared that I will screw this up the same way I've done with every diet I've ever tried. I tell myself that I will be successful, but I also know that I always tell myself this and yet I always fail. What if I'm one of those who not only fails at this surgery but gets even bigger? I feel like this is my LAST chance at a normal life, but now I'm really scared that I could fail at this. I think that perhaps a support group might help but I don't know of any. As it is, I'm posting on the North Carolina board because the South Carolina board (I live in Fort Mill, SC) is mainly for the upstate. I don't have an angel and don't even know if I need one because I don't know what their role is. I'm sorry I'm whining, please forgive me for that. If anyone has any words of advice, I'd greatly appreciate it. Thank you and God Bless. Cathy

I think that is normal to fear failure. We have all failed many times or we would not qualify for weight loss. I didn't start to worry about failure until after surgery. Then I kept thinking I will be the only person to screw it up. The hasrdest part is don't compare yourself to others. We are all unique I got over my doubts by taking it one day at a time. I keep record of my protein grams and fluid. I was keeping a notebook, but now that I have gone back to work; I use a dry erase board on the frigde. That helps me to stay on track and to make sure I am doing everything I can for myself. The other thing I did was to start making life changes before the surgery. I took the stairs even when I didn't feel like it, I made healthier food choices. Be positive. Belinda

Hi Cathy, Number one, you have a GREAT surgeon. You're in excellent hands. I think the doubt you're feeling is perfectly normal. I feel the same way even now, but I know it is because of my experiences in the past. My nutritionist told me to 'let my pouch do it's job' because I'm anal...I record every crumb, weigh everyday, obsess, etc. However, after going through my first plateau, I now see that this will work...it might not make me skinny, but I know I'll be at a healthier weight soon...and I know that the surgery is working. On a normal diet, I would have probably gotten frustrated and cheated when I hit my first plateau, but I realized that, as long as I follow the rules (no grazing is a biggy) my pouch will do it's job and it's all good. I've read so many posts from people who felt the same way in the beginning. It helped me to see I'm not the only one holding my breath waiting for the bomb to drop that makes me screw up and quit...you can't quit on this. You just do what you're supposed to...eat protein first, get the quantity your nut/surg. recommend, drink and get the water they recommend, and exercise and this tool will work. It's the miracle we all dreamed about...you're going to be fine...just relax and enjoy the ride. Dr. Melkonian will take great care of you and before you know it you'll be home and losing.

Cathy, what you are feeling is completely normal, I promise. All of us here have spent a lifetime dieting...and failing. It's only natural that we would feel like was are going to fail yet again. All I can tell you is to take one day at a time and keep your eye on the prize...a new and healthier you! I am almost 3 weeks out of surgery now and, whenever I start thinking "bad food" thoughts, I just remind myself how great it's been so far (36 pounds in 19 days) and how wonderful it's going to be when I get to goal. Being scared is normal. You are going to do great. Try to believe that. Lisa L. 380/344/170

Cathy - I have my surgery with DrMelkonian next month. As for support groups... there is one Monday the 15th at Presby Hosp at 6:30 in the "Bobcat" room. I havent been to a meeting yet, but I will be going to this one. If you would like to meet up, let me know! Would love a buddy There is another support group that meets at Earthfair (Johnston rd @ I-485) they meet the 2nd Tuesday of every month at 6:30. Also,Southeast Bariatrics has one on the 2nd monday of each month for general WLS. 6:30 at the Cornwell Center 2001 Selwyn Ave @ 6:30. Those are all Ive come across so far