Family Involvment

 I am new to this site and new to the thoughts of having gastric bypass. How does one go about getting started? I told my husband, of 20 years, that I was thinking about having it done and his response was "I dont think that's a good idea. That's the easy way out, it's like a cop-out". How do I respond to this?? Also talking to women around work about others that's had the surgery, the problems/re-hospitalizations is always the topic of discussion. I know there are risks on both sides, and I know I have to decide for myself which is better for me but I don't know where to start. I want to have the surgery done so I can be at a healthy weight and look better than what I do now.

Any suggestions for a newbie will be greatly appreciated!!

Thanks
Diana

It depends on where you are located, but most Bariatric programs have a free information session. They are usually required as the first step. As for peoples responses, I would not talk so much about it until you are firm on a decision. People always know someone who died or had lots of complications, no one ever sgares the positive. And there is a lot of positives.
It would also be good for your husband to come to the information session. It is likely after the true facts he would feel better about it.

The response to "it being the easy way out" can go two different ways.
1. If it is the easy way out then you are smarter than most, because why would you not do the easy thing for your health?????

2. There is nothing easy about the gastric bypass. Those who say that have not been through the process. It is long, emotional and life changing. But very worth it in the end.

Hope this helps a little. If you are near the raleigh durham area and you need a surgeon recomendation just let me know

Audra

Hi Diana,

It's not that uncommon to have people question your decision. When  told my mother, she and my sister really had a hard time with it and tried very hard to convince me not to do it. I suggested to my mother than she come with me to an appointment and ask any questions she might have. I respected her concern and judgement, while knowing that ultimately it would be my decision. She did come with me and she did ask questions; ultimately, she left feeling more comfortable about what happens, the risks associated with the surgery, with not doing the surgery, with complications, the expectations of excess weight loss and the expectations of the probability of maintaining the weight loss. 

Generally the issues surrounding problems around surgery and being re-admitted are usually associated with dehydration. Of course, there can be other issues, as with any surgical procedure, but the issue that most often has people re-admitted to the hospital is dehydration. Going with an ASMBS Center of Excellence increases the chances of a successful outcome because they have a rigorous standard to which the program and associated surgeons must meet for certification. This generally means that they have a full faceted program that includes psychological and nutritional support, as well as on going support groups. It also means that surgeon's have had significant experience with the surgery. All of this goes to support your successful outcome. 

I would suggest that you attend informational seminars of at least 2 to 3 programs and hopefully find programs that are ASMBS COE's. If at all possible, I would encourage you to have your husband attend some of them with you. 

When you go to these seminars you will find that WLS is hand's down, the most effective weight loss tool available. You and your husband need to remember that success is not 'just' losing the weight, but it is keeping it off for 2, 3, 5, 10 and more years... With WLS, the success rates are about 80%. With just about every other method, the success rates are 3 to 5%. That's a HUGE difference!

I'm not sure where you are located, but I host monthly peer-to-peer support group meetings in North Raleigh. If you are able to do so and want to, you are welcome to attend. For more information about the  meetings you can go to www.meetup.com/nc-wls. Of course, your husband is welcome to attend with you. 

Wishing you all the best,