This has been a really harsh week for me

I got up Monday Morning and was 5 minutes from getting out the door to school when my phone rang. It was a California number so I instantly knew who it was a why she was calling. My father had passed away a few hours earlier in his sleep. His wife was calling to let me know. He wanted no funeral so there will not be one or a memorial service of any kind. He had been sick from lung cancer for the last ten years and the last three years or so he basically pushed everyone away because he did not want anyone to see him the way he was. I am angry about that  but He was the dying one so I had to comply and just wait. I am struggling with how I should feel. He decided not to participate in my life or in my children's lives so they don't know him. He did not see me get my health back. I would have liked for him to have at least known that I was going to be okay. Maybe he did but I don't know. His wife is less than 2 years older than I am and now that he is gone I think she and I can communicate. He wasn't allowing it for whatever his reasons were. She has a dozen health issues of her own and I hope she will allow my brother and I to help her out. Anyway I just needed to say it in a safe place and this is it. Thanks guys.
I have struggled with eating right this week but I think I am getting it back under control before any damage is done. I did keep up my supplements and protein. I just ate too much other stuff I shouldn't have. And I missed two PE classes where I would have burned a lot of calories. I did get to my yoga classes though and those workouts are getting tougher each time so I at least got some movement done. I will be back to my regular routine this weekend and back to all of my gym classes as of Monday. I know its the only way. I am in the crunch time for my classes now so my weekends are really full of homework but no matter what I will get to both of my support group meetings this month. Sorry for the rambling but I just have to write it out.

((HUGS))  That sounds like a tough thing to deal with emotionally.  If I were you I'd seek a counselor about it, even if it's just for a few sessions.  My dad and I once had a big falling out.  We were never very close anyway, but I'm glad that by the time my dad went we'd healed our relationship.  You never had that opportunity.  That is sad.  Maybe the relationship with your dad's wife will help you heal.  Best wishes.

Thank you for what you have said. I does help. I think after speaking with my Dad's wife it will help to regain our friendship and it might even help her. She is SMO and I would like to see her get her health back. My Dad made life difficult for her over the last few years. He basically did not let het go anywhere. Yeah I know she had a choice but I also know how my Dad could be too and I am sure it was hard for her to find her own identity. I hope she can find a way to change this now and take care of herself. I told her this and she agreed. Is that a start or what? As for counsiling for me I will make an effort to see what my school has for me in that respect. It is a good suggestion. Mostly though I know I have to keep up with my WLS support. Indirect as this is it will make a difference I am sure.

(((Ann))),

I'm so very sorry for your losses and I hope that time, prayer and counseling will help to ease the pain and burden of your loss. I agree with Meredith about checking into some counseling. You may be able to find it through the school, but if it is not available there, check into Catholic Charities, Jewish Family Services or the United Way. These all have counseling services available on a sliding scale that to be honest can go to 0$ if that is what is necessary. You do not have to be 'affiliated' or of the faith to avail yourself of their services. 

I hope and pray for healing for your and yours as you all move forward through this loss. 

I'll see you next weekend my friend.

Warmly,

 Sending you love and light to help you.
Family drama is some tough stuff.
I am thinking about you and miss you and my OH family so much.
                                            Annie

Annie, my prayers are with you. Sorry to hear about your dad and that he had withdrawn himself. I do not have any profound thoughts or advice to share, but I certainly will continue to pray for your comfort and healing.

I totally understand about taking care of yourself with regards to eating and supplement. Try your best to take a few moments to take care of you each day. This is a very weak area for me, so I am glad you recognize the need for watching those areas.

Hang in there and do not hesitate to (yell) if you need anything!

Love ya!