Feeling Conflicted

I had my 6 month check up yesterday.  Things are going very well and I am down 95lbs - no post surgery issues at all, feeling great, and my blood work is looking good, too.  I spoke with the nurse practitioner (who I normally see) and asked her about goal weight.  No one ever mentions it at the doctor's office.  She explained that the medical staff doesn't want me to get "married" to a goal weight/number because there's no real definitive way to know where your body will settle.

She explained that I've lost about 50% of my excess weight and can probably expect to lose 40 - 50 more pounds before my body settles around 180lbs. 

Here's where I'm conflicted...I honestly feel great about my progress and would not dare complain if I didn't lose another pound.  I am THRILLED at my weight loss and am loving life!  However, I'm somwhat disappointed at the idea that I've only got 40lbs to go...I mean, I know that my weight loss has slowed down significantly.  I experienced a 6 week stall and have only lost about 8-10lbs since the stall, but I guess I thought that I'd lose more than 40 more pounds.

I'm honestly not trying to complain. I'm just feeling a little . . . ehhh.  I've been reading so much about people who are gaining all or more of their weight back, too, and I'm scared to be a failure. 

Thanks for letting me share,
Fran

The only advice I can offer is to continue to seek the advice of your nut and do your best to follow the rules and guidelines to do your best to get as much of the weight off as you can. 

I suppose it's good that your surgeon is being realistic, but s/he doesn't really know where you'll end up.  You could blow past those 40 pounds or so you were told you'd lose.

Good luck!

I think the hardest part about this whole journey is the transition into the maintenance phase. Dropping the weight was thrilling and even when it slowed down it was still ok. But something about accepting where my body was and where I wanted it to be has been difficult.

I'm healthier than I have ever been in my entire life. I weigh less than I ever have in my adult life. I can do anything I want and not be limited by my size. So why am I not completely on board this journey/process 1000% mentally? In all probability it's because my head still hasn't caught up with the rest of me.

I still expect to see the "Big Me" when I look in the mirror. Instead of seeing the total picture it's easier for me to focus on an area of my body that I don't like (somedays it's a saggy thigh, a batwing or a deflated belly roll). So much of this is because of years and years and years of being obese and the toll it took on my both mentally and physically. 

I guess what I'm trying to make sure you know is that you're not alone. You are not a failure. You're not complaining. It sounds to me like you're simply facing your fears among friends who completely understand. 

- Iris 

Fran,

When I had my 6 month appointment, I got similar information. I was also concerned that I wouldn't get to where I 'wanted' to be. It's hard to know for sure where you will end up, but I think if you stay with the program, you'll get to a place where you have resolved your health issues, improved your quality of life and how you view your appearance. I used a site that helped me get perspective on how I was doing in relation to people that matched my demographics. It really helped me. When I plugged in my numbers originally, to be honest, I didn't get the 'result' I wanted, but it motivated me to stay with it the program and eventually I got there. The website is thinnerself.com. 

Congratulations on your success!

Hi Fran,

Don't forget, you are stronger and healthier now and capable of much more physical activity.  While your surgery may only give you another 40-50 lb lost, there's absolutely nothing stopping you from losing more.  The pouch will still give you some restriction in quantity.  Couple that with a low fat high protein diet and a little bit of exercise, and the remaining weight will come off.  You can easily blow past that next 50 lbs.  Good luck.  Remember your only limitations are those that you create for yourself.

Dalton