In Korea and wants to go to Germany!

We got married because we agreed that we would get out of the army after Korea and now he tells me he wants to go to Germany! I really don't know how i feel about this. I want to get a few more degrees and have a career of my own but if we're off in Korea or Germany and he's deployed ... I'm not the best with stress like that .. i really don't think i could handle it. One of the girls who i met on another support forum just lost her husband recently, she was 8 months pregnant at the time. She was amazingly strong in the way she handled it. I'm just not that strong ..i'd probably die right along with him if something like that happened. I knew when i married him that he loves his job and that he had thought about staying in for the 20 so he could retire. I would hate to impose my wants on him by asking him to leave the army if its what he truly wants to do. My career is important to me to a certain point but i wouldn't risk my marriage by pursing it. So, thats not the issue. What I worry about the most, and the main reason i would like him to get out is his safety. I'm terrified that something will happen to him while he's deployed some where. He's already served his country over 8 years and he's been deployed, pretty much everywhere during that time. I just don't see the purpose in putting his life in danger when we're trying to start a family together. UGGHH.. we'll probably end up in Germany after Korea .. i just needed to vent a little.

Cristy, (((((((((HUGS)))))))) Being a military wife is the hardest job in the world. Right now, with the War going on and what not, it makes being in the military not too safe either. However, we have wonderful men (like your husband & mine) and women who are fighting for our freedom. None of us want to be in the shoes of someone who has lost a loved one due to the conflict at hand. Like you, I had a friend who lost her husband, and although I was sad for her, all I could think of was, "thank god it was not my husband". Also, since we are military wife's, our careers are constantly put on hold. The one thing I hate about moving, is starting over in the workforce. I work as a Medical Coder, and everytime we move to a new base, I have to look for a new job, and usually take a pay cut because of it...While, our husbands already have a job for them and don't have to take a pay cut..........Can't offer too much advice, as my hubby is planning on staying in until retirement. I'd say just continue to get your degrees at the new places that you go to. Most classes from college transfer with you, so you shouldn't have a problem there. And, please vent as needed. That's what we are here for...most of us have been on the very same path. Hugs, Beth

As a retired Navy wife, I understand your feelings all too much. I looked at it this way, I followed him from port to port putting my life second and supporting his career. Now that he is retired, it is the other way around. Just remember being married alone is a job within itself, and both parties have to work at it. Do not put off getting your college degrees. I am currently working on my Bachelors in Business Administration and Finance. I do this all on-line through the University of Phoenix. FYI, there are alot of military people who do classes. The other think, look at it this way you will be able to learn about the different cultures and new ways of cooking. It is an adventure.