I hated my body naked fat...Im' not in LOVE with it and never will be. Most ppl hate their bodies (thanks supermodel industry!) but we are what we are. Try to accept your new body. It's hard, and I'm not fully there almost 18 mo. out. You're waking up every day, given another chance to make an impact on your own life and those you touch. :) Look at your glass as half full..a.nd you'll see like I did that it's really over-flowing!

Hugs,
Marie

Hi Mitz,
Welcome to the Mental Health Forum.  I am mainly an alcoholic, and I have always tried to stay above the legal radar, so I have never gotten a DUI, or been arrested.  Hopefully, that will be a permanent state for me.

That said, I have done AA 12th Step service by going to the local county prison and taking an AA meeting to the women there.  I was always grateful to be able to do that service.  With my recent relapses, I will not qualify for that service till I have a year of sobriety.

My younger son was arrested when he was barely 19, charged with possession.  He managed to get off with probation.  A year later, he entered a rehab, and admitted to me that he had been dealing heroin, in order to support his habit.  The terms of his probation were that his charges would be expunged if he did not get arrested again. 

Hang in there.  Trust your God for the outcome of your next court visit.  His grace will get you through whatever happens.

Hugs,
Trish

I'm currently on a triple med anti-depressant combo and one of them is trazadone. I fight taking it as well but honestly it does give a good night sleep (atleast for me)
I'm glad that you have admitted the problem and made the step of going to AA. In the past I spent a lot of time in NA meetings. If you find the right group of people they are definitely a safe haven. I know your struggles just ake it day by day.

Mitzi:
I thought about you last night and one other thing I wanted to suggest was if you can do your CSR at some type of non-profit that interests you. I spent over 10 years working w/ at risk youth - many who were on probation and had to do CSR. They would complain about it all the time - UNLESS they found somewhere to do it that was a service they could relate to and enjoy.
And - when you go to court - ask the judge to set a number of hours per month to be done that are realistic with your full time work and family. Generally, in Texas - it is like 16 hours a month - which amounts to two Saturday's a month!
Hang in there.
Anne

  Today, I have to admit that I am an alchoholic.  I have tried on my own to handle it but I continue to fail.  I've been praying a lot but still last night, I binged.  When I drink, I end up in the arms of men I don't know and can't remember.  I'm so ashamed.  I have a wonderful husband who loves me and if he ever knew, it would kill him.  Even now, I think, what if he reads this somehow.  I should keep my secrets hidden.  I can't lie anymore.  I am planning to attend an aa meeting tonight.  Please pray that I have the courage to go.