Reflection

Hi all, I am feeling very reflective this week. I am 2 yr post op and one week shy of 50 yr old. I am so grateful. Grateful for my life, my surgery, my recovery. I could dwell on lost moments, the pain of living in active addiction, lost youth but what a waste of energy. I look at young people and they all look beautiful to me. Youth is it wasted on the young who take it for granted? LOL Nope. We all have our day. I am just glad I can appreciate what I have today. I know I sound sappy but it is heartfelt.Yes, left to my own devices I would eat, drink and be merry and ultimately miserable. Some days I want to do just that but if I think it thru to the end I choose to not do it. For me it requires the support of others. I get lost in my own head. I need others to point out that my ears are falling off because I cannot see them!!! Posting here allows me to read my own thoughts and see what I am thinking. Occassionally someone out there reads it and sees themselves. That's how it works. Wishing you all a wonderful day, Laurie

I sometimes look back and regret all those wasted years being fat. I was the token fat kid in school. The shame, the tears, the wasted time . . but, on the other hand, I look at young people getting WLS today and wonder could I have been mature enough to handle it then. No. I know that in my heart. Hey, I'm 3 years out and 53. You're a mere child!

I was not fat until 10 yr old and honestly I was not fat. Just a *****ubby but in my mind I was FAT. It was what it was. Personally, I can look back and see so many good times spoiled by my self destructive thinking. Being skinny would not have changed that. I had a long fuse. It took me many years to get to the point that I was willing to do whatever it took to be healthy and happy. I am glad I lived long enough to enjoy my golden years. laurie