Seeing it through

Do you know how wonderful it is to wake up this morning not only at goal, but not hungover or bloated from eating and drinking? Maybe what I post is too personal, but being connected helped me ride through a hard couple of days. Pre-wls and getting sober, I NEVER rode anything through; too uncomfortable-must numb out. Not anymore. It may be uncomfortable sometimes, but I have absolute faith I can hang onto my heinie and ride it out, and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Funny thing is, I can go for months with not much conflict, then out of nowhwere, whammo! That's what makes this such a tricky deal. When I had my relapse, I thought I was in a good place; even went to a meeting that am and had lots of giggles. Hmmm. Anyway, I feel great now, and a little proud that I saw it through. Each time it makes me stronger for the next time. And there WILL be a next time! Life happens. Anyway, reaching goal was pretty easy in the sense I knew exactly what I had to do to get where I wanted to be. Developing coping and living skills is a bit of a tougher nut to crack, especially if you've never experienced good examples of it. But, forward ho! I'm NEVER going back! (least I hope not!) I'm glad I have my problems. Almost sorry for normies who never have the impetus to explore themselves, change behaviors and grow. Ignorance may be bliss, but self-exploration and knowledge is the cat's meow! Vicki

You go Girl-Stay Strong for you ! Your in my thoughts and prayers. Thanks you for sharing, I truly can relate. Make it a GREAT day! Linda Sue

Hi Vicki, I appreciate your openess. I have a friend who says I know I have another relapse in me... I am just not sure I have another chance at recovery. It helps me to hear that and know I am always at risk. I never know what is going to trigger my disease. This week I was doing great in many ways but everytime I looked in the mirror I saw a 316# woman. I know I do look different but my brain did not see it that way. I have had great success so far but my self esteam is my weakness today. Somedays it is other things. I have 3 young adult kids and a family friends daughter in my life I struggle to not be co- depndant with. Funny, I have been doing better than ever with that and next thing I know I am obsessed with body image. As another friend says, This disease is baffling, cunning, and wants me dead but will settle for me high. Enjoy your day. I am cleaning house, going to watch my daughter's dance, and to a meeting. Grateful to have all those opportunities! Just for Today, Laurie